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What to do with $175,000 in weed found in your back yard
December 6, 2012 7:03 PM   Subscribe

Some evil bastard has stuffed a bag of dope into a hole behind my house and turned my life into the backdrop of a James Ellroy noir.
posted by growabrain (101 comments total) 17 users marked this as a favorite

 
Ain't no lobos.
posted by nathancaswell at 7:07 PM on December 6, 2012 [6 favorites]


You think this boy Reed has got any notion of the sorts of sons of bitches that're huntin' him?
posted by sonic meat machine at 7:12 PM on December 6, 2012 [4 favorites]


He called the police? Damn, what a terribly bad move. Doesn't he know that you can smoke marijuana instead? To get you high?
posted by Greg Nog at 7:13 PM on December 6, 2012 [80 favorites]


geez, I know what's going to be stuffed in a duffel bag next.
posted by boo_radley at 7:14 PM on December 6, 2012 [2 favorites]


A horse's severed head?
posted by indubitable at 7:15 PM on December 6, 2012


66 bags of lsd.
posted by boo_radley at 7:17 PM on December 6, 2012


Exceptional tagging work, sir.
posted by louche mustachio at 7:17 PM on December 6, 2012 [16 favorites]


A smaller duffel bag?
posted by davejay at 7:18 PM on December 6, 2012 [3 favorites]


geez, I know what's going to be stuffed in a duffel bag next.


153 tubes of chocolate chip cookie dough?
posted by louche mustachio at 7:18 PM on December 6, 2012 [7 favorites]


davejay: "A smaller duffel bag?"

Oh man.
posted by boo_radley at 7:20 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


That's definitely a delivery for a (legal) dispensary in Los Angeles. My understanding is that federal agents recently raided and closed all of the dispensaries in that area. I bet that load was probably on the way to the city from up north when the raids happened, and the grower's agent all of a sudden didn't have a storefront to take it directly to and sell. That's probably a really tough spot to be in for them, hence the stash.

Also, that guy's pricing scheme is way off—he's over by a lot. Multiples of the price of 1/8th oz. of medicinal marijuana is a very poor base for calculation.
posted by carsonb at 7:21 PM on December 6, 2012 [11 favorites]


Here's a link to the story about the raids in the area oh, about 2 months ago.
posted by carsonb at 7:22 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


you are missing the chronic tag; for shame, my good sir/madam.
posted by elizardbits at 7:25 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


Horrible situation to be in. Good thing that the officer who showed up had some common sense. He's lucky he wasn't arrested himself.
posted by PareidoliaticBoy at 7:27 PM on December 6, 2012 [3 favorites]


My, what an interesting story in which to plant ads for SUNGEVITY® solar panels and the worldwide mobile photo game SNAPCIOUS™.

/cynic
posted by Sys Rq at 7:29 PM on December 6, 2012 [13 favorites]


"And we’ll keep an eye on the place," means "you're on your own, good luck with all this."
posted by peeedro at 7:29 PM on December 6, 2012 [16 favorites]


You know? In LA that's not an horrible situation to be in. LAPD is not the feds, they know the situation in the city in regards to legal/illegal drugs and the medical marijuana dispensary situation. The chance of them hassling this guy was really low. He had to go to significant effort just to get the cops to show up!

Really the person in trouble is the one who just lost a big load of (again, legal!) merchandise that they're probably in the hole for with their employer. Who may or may not be the most savory of types.
posted by carsonb at 7:31 PM on December 6, 2012 [2 favorites]


Yeah, some crazy shit goes down in LA. Sometime I'll have to tell you about the time someone dropped off a pile of about 50 full auto Uzis and Mac 10s in my living room, asked me to babysit them, and I stupidly agreed.
posted by charlie don't surf at 7:37 PM on December 6, 2012 [9 favorites]


Like right now?
posted by carsonb at 7:38 PM on December 6, 2012 [16 favorites]


Hmm, I bet someone is going to recognize their vacuum packaging and be quite annoyed with their courier. Even if the (likely)dispensary paid in advance.
posted by oneirodynia at 7:41 PM on December 6, 2012


Damnit charlie dont surf, tell us about that story. You're like that uncle who says "back in the war when I was stuck in a single tank without any ammunition, bleeding profusely out of a flesh wound, and had to defend all of Okinawa against hordes of Imperial soldiers...i'll tell you next time." and never comes back.
posted by kurosawa's pal at 7:42 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


He had to go to significant effort just to get the cops to show up!

Sure, in this specific case. But it's not clear that it was Federal authorities who were involved in the case I linked to, either. But America is so messed up about drugs that nothing, and I mean nothing, would surprise me. It's certainly not a decision I'd want to have to make, given that catching some power-tripping jerk with a badge in a bad mood could ruin your life forever. It probably helps to be white and relatively affluent.
posted by PareidoliaticBoy at 7:42 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


charlie don't surf: "Yeah, some crazy shit goes down in LA. Sometime I'll have to tell you about the time someone dropped off a pile of about 50 full auto Uzis and Mac 10s in my living room, asked me to babysit them, and I stupidly agreed."

I'm not sure how to threaten a man who has 50 uzis, but imagine me doing that if I don't read about this story, like, pronto.
posted by boo_radley at 7:45 PM on December 6, 2012 [2 favorites]


Some evil bastard has not stuffed a bag of dope into a hole behind my house and turned my life into the backdrop of a GODDAMN IT THERE WAS HASH TOO! I HAVEN'T SEEN HASH SINCE 1998! Um, at a party I went to. That I left because someone had drugs.
posted by Cookiebastard at 7:52 PM on December 6, 2012 [9 favorites]


Hey this reminds me of the time someone left a bunch of liquor in my back yard and it was a huge deal that I thought I might be in danger over. OH WAIT NO ALCOHOL IS TOTALLY LEGAL UNLIKE THAT SCARY HORRIBLE STUFF CALLED MARIJUANA.

(abusing edit window to fist-pump WA and CO)
posted by eurypteris at 7:53 PM on December 6, 2012 [6 favorites]


I am standing chest-deep in a dank, muddy concrete-lined hole in Silver Lake

He found dank in the dank?
posted by PeterMcDermott at 7:57 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


Personally, I like the taste.
posted by angerbot at 7:59 PM on December 6, 2012


Are we certain this is real?
posted by ambulocetus at 8:01 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


Yeah, some crazy shit goes down in LA. Sometime I'll have to tell you about the time someone dropped off a pile of about 50 full auto Uzis and Mac 10s in my living room, asked me to babysit them, and I stupidly agreed

A story for every occasion.
posted by sevenyearlurk at 8:02 PM on December 6, 2012


Are we certain this is real?

there's only one way to find out...
posted by facetious at 8:02 PM on December 6, 2012


Really the person in trouble is the one who just lost a big load of (again, legal!) merchandise.

Why would you bury your valuable legal merchandise in a hole on somebody else's property?
posted by PeterMcDermott at 8:08 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


Are we certain this is real?

Was there something fishy-seeming to you about the police officer's uniform? Their cruiser? I've seen my share of LAPD cruisers, and if that was a fake one I'm impressed.

And yeah, I've been the lucky sot sitting for half an hour in the waiting room while a dispensary bought their merchandise. The bag was rolling luggage not a duffel, and the courier was actually several people and a dog, all piled into a tow truck. Even with everything being on the up-and-up (presumably) the people who'd likely been effecting similar transactions when they weren't on the up-and-up remained twitchy and nervous throughout.

This situation is totally plausible, and I see no reason to suspect it's fake. Anyway, so what if it is a fictional account? What's your point, ambulocetus?
posted by carsonb at 8:10 PM on December 6, 2012


> Multiples of the price of 1/8th oz. of medicinal marijuana is a very poor base for calculation.

Doesn't stop law enforcement; that's how "street value" is calculated for sentencing.
posted by scruss at 8:10 PM on December 6, 2012


geez, I know what's going to be stuffed in a duffel bag next.

Eight heads?
posted by Mezentian at 8:14 PM on December 6, 2012


Oh alright, I thought I'd keep you in suspense for a bit.

I once rented out my artist's loft on Traction Avenue for a film shoot. They put us up in a hotel overnight. When I came back, there are about 50 real machine guns sitting in my living room, jumbled together in a huge pile. I walk in and I'm like WTF IS THIS?!? The production assistant is the last man on the set, he hands me my house keys, and says they just finished the big shootout scene, but they can't reach the armorer to pick up the weapons, could I watch them for a while? He'll pick them up in about an hour I promise ok bye.

I saw some of the scenes they were shooting, yeah, these are real full auto weapons, even if they were only shooting blanks. An hour passes, more hours, it is getting late in the evening, and nobody comes to pick up the guns. My girlfriend and I are sitting there, staring at this huge pile of weapons, and we realize we are fucked. Lots of people saw these guns go to into my apartment and not come back out. My loft is poorly secured, anyone could break into this loft easily, and there are lots of people who would kill for this weapons cache.

So, what do you do with 50 automatic weapons? I considered calling the LAPD and asking them to take the guns away, but my loft is in the notorious LAPD Central Division, the call would be handled by real hardnosed cops dispatched from their precinct house on Skid Row. And what would I tell them? "Occifer, I have a bunch of automatic weapons in my house, could you please come and take them away? I promise they're not loaded." Yeah, that could be a problem.

So my girlfriend and I sit there and stare at the weapons. We are sure as hell not going to touch them, in case something happens and then our fingerprints are on them. We can't even move them, and they're sitting right in our living room, visible through our picture window, where they are in plain view of the residents of the apartment building across the street (where incidentally, Frank Miller lived). I am envisioning a scene like this.

My girlfriend and I cannot sleep. We just sat there and stared at the goddam pile of guns all night long, terrified that someone would break in, so we had to be there to guard them. I don't think we took our eyes off of them.

So about 9AM the next morning, we are just exhausted from no sleep and nervous tension when I get a phone call from the armorer. He asks if I'm there and can he pick up the guns now? I said where the FUCK have you been? You were supposed to pick these up last night. I've been sitting here all night, on guard duty over your fucking guns. You get the fuck over here right NOW or in about 1 hour I'm going to throw them out my window into the street.

The armorer comes over. He has no credentials whatsoever to show that he really is the owner of these guns, but hey, they have two guys taking away the guns and putting them in their truck. My gf and I are about ready to explode, we want to scream at them, but hey, they have lots of guns.

We decided to never ever rent out our loft for a film shoot again.
posted by charlie don't surf at 8:14 PM on December 6, 2012 [74 favorites]


turned my life into the backdrop of a James Ellroy noir.

He became obsessed with the spirit of his dead mother?

Sometime I'll have to tell you about the time someone dropped off a pile of about 50 full auto Uzis and Mac 10s in my living room

Yeah, that reminds me of the time someone dropped off about a dozen crates of 9th century Chinese porcelains and asked me to help hide them. #sameshitdifferentday
posted by octobersurprise at 8:16 PM on December 6, 2012


(where incidentally, Frank Miller lived).

Is there a story attached to this?
Please?
posted by Mezentian at 8:17 PM on December 6, 2012


Not real.
Evidence: "Supervisor" isn't wearing any gloves and looks like a porn star.
Verdict: Viral (ewww) advertising for a porno.

Porno Blue.
posted by Big_B at 8:19 PM on December 6, 2012


I think this is a viral ad for cheesy male rings.
posted by nathancaswell at 8:22 PM on December 6, 2012


Yes, of course, Mezentian. I have told that story too many times.
posted by charlie don't surf at 8:28 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


Evidence: "Supervisor" isn't wearing any gloves and looks like a porn star.

He should have hired "Hot Cops." And that's why you never hide your pot in the backyard of a guy with a tumblr.
posted by artychoke at 8:30 PM on December 6, 2012 [5 favorites]


Why does this never happen to me?
posted by Veritron at 8:31 PM on December 6, 2012


"Officer, I found this duffel bag filled wi...half-filled with weed"
posted by stifford at 8:42 PM on December 6, 2012 [37 favorites]


turned my life into the backdrop of a James Ellroy noir.

He became obsessed with the spirit of his dead mother?


Or started breaking into women's apartments to sniff their panties?

"It's not my fault, Your Honour! I was trying to track down the perps who left a bag of weed on my property and I couldn't afford a proper sniffer dog!"
posted by PeterMcDermott at 8:48 PM on December 6, 2012


Officer looks like a well groomed policewoman to me.
posted by maryr at 8:56 PM on December 6, 2012


"Supervisor" isn't wearing any gloves and looks like a porn star.

Uh, I'm not sure why you would say this but boy does it read rather misogynistic to me.
posted by WinnipegDragon at 9:08 PM on December 6, 2012 [14 favorites]


...but they can't reach the armorer to pick up the weapons...

I know what I want to be when I grow up.
posted by griphus at 9:16 PM on December 6, 2012


So I wasn't sure if I'd ever mentioned here before how I dealt with my own unexpected windfall in this category. Turns out I have told this tale.
posted by PareidoliaticBoy at 9:28 PM on December 6, 2012


we realize we are fucked. Lots of people saw these guns go to into my apartment and not come back out.

Waaaaait a minute. So.... you have an enormous cache of weaponry. People know that you have this enormous cache of weaponry. They know you are home. They know you are home with fifty goddamn machine guns. And you are worried they are going to break in?

Somebody, somewhere, has this whole "home defense" thing calculated completely wrong.
posted by Mars Saxman at 9:31 PM on December 6, 2012 [23 favorites]


Let us go rob the man with fifty machineguns.

An excellent plan.
posted by adamdschneider at 10:17 PM on December 6, 2012 [14 favorites]


God damn you Santa, you missed my house again!
posted by LarryC at 10:17 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


you are missing the chronic tag; for shame, my good sir/madam.


Though this is a glaring oversight, I believe the HomeImprovement tag makes up for it.
posted by louche mustachio at 10:26 PM on December 6, 2012


Brucey! Someone stole my purse!
posted by Goofyy at 10:26 PM on December 6, 2012


Why would you bury your valuable legal merchandise in a hole on somebody else's property?

Whoever it is, Jabba's through with them. He has no time for smugglers who drop their shipments at the first sign of an Imperial cruiser.
posted by 7segment at 10:29 PM on December 6, 2012 [15 favorites]


11 comments till a comment on that valuation.

Not sure if I should be surprised that it took so long or disappointed that someone hasn't dissected the supposed price more thoroughly.
posted by fragmede at 10:30 PM on December 6, 2012


LOL. Well, there weren't any bullets. The actors were out in public shooting thousands of rounds of blanks, everyone knows it's a movie shoot. Anyone with a real gun could have gone right into the live action and stolen everyone's guns. That's why they're supposed to have real police with real guns around the location. But the rentacops all went home and I was stuck with guns and no ammo, and everyone knew it.

I know what I want to be when I grow up.

The Armorer is a longstanding Hollywood backstage role and a legal requirement. Actually the armorer is never supposed to let the weapons out of his sight, that is like a federal crime when you're dealing with full auto machine guns. I still have no idea what happened, did the armorer just forget he left behind 50 guns?
posted by charlie don't surf at 10:31 PM on December 6, 2012 [2 favorites]


Just reading this makes makes me super anxious. Some combination of the frenetic tone of the writing and the actual story. Just, augh. Poor dude.
posted by NoraReed at 10:36 PM on December 6, 2012


One wonders if the story might have been different had the solar panel guy not been standing right there...
posted by Scram at 10:53 PM on December 6, 2012 [1 favorite]


Probably not too different. "Oops I found your hiding spot" and "Oops we found your hiding spot" both have the same second act: "What do I/we do when you come back?" I guess one is a stoner flick (Pinapple Express II anyone?) and the other a straight up action movie?
posted by carsonb at 10:57 PM on December 6, 2012


But the rentacops all went home and I was stuck with guns and no ammo, and everyone knew it.

Unlike the movies, though, the worst that would have happened is that Thug X would have tapped on your door and simply taken them. I'd think that they'd not want to cause more trouble for themselves when they knew you were a dude who'd rented his apartment for a movie shoot. Why would splattering it with your brains make any sense?
posted by jimmythefish at 11:01 PM on December 6, 2012


I was waiting for the bit where the dealer comes back and get locked in the basement and then no one knows how to make things safe for anyone again so they accidentally wire him up to a home-made electroshock machine and test him on trivia questions.
posted by lollusc at 11:04 PM on December 6, 2012


So wouldn't the rightful owner of the weed, assuming that he could prove that the bag and its contents were his, be able to retrieve them from the LAPD?
posted by Kraftmatic Adjustable Cheese at 11:10 PM on December 6, 2012


Hmm, that's a lot of good cannabis.

I personally might bury it somewhere else - then go on vacation for a few weeks.
posted by lupus_yonderboy at 11:27 PM on December 6, 2012


So wouldn't the rightful owner of the weed, assuming that he could prove that the bag and its contents were his, be able to retrieve them from the LAPD?

This stuff is only legal in a very specific context...I think that federally-controlled substances being found stashed on private property and now in the custody of the LAPD on account of DEA raids is likely outside of that context. The DA's office would likely cite the common law precedent of 'finders keepers losers weepers' if pressed.
posted by jimmythefish at 11:29 PM on December 6, 2012


I'm for this being fake. This happened today? He's on a deadline and doesn't have time for this and yet writes a digest-form blog post about it? The photos are done with professional equipment and are a little too casually good. I also suppose that while there's nothing wrong with a gloveless supervisor with red high-gloss fake nails it doesn't exactly scream authentic. That, and the immediate question of her being in the photos in the first place.

It doesn't add up.
posted by jimmythefish at 11:39 PM on December 6, 2012


If I was the solar guy I would have apologized profusely. "Ah, shucks, OK, you got me. Sorry, I will put it back in my truck now."
posted by Meatbomb at 12:19 AM on December 7, 2012 [6 favorites]


I'm for this being fake. This happened today? He's on a deadline and doesn't have time for this and yet writes a digest-form blog post about it? The photos are done with professional equipment and are a little too casually good. I also suppose that while there's nothing wrong with a gloveless supervisor with red high-gloss fake nails it doesn't exactly scream authentic. That, and the immediate question of her being in the photos in the first place.

I don't know enough about photography to know if these are taken with professional equipment, but considering how cheap you can get a decent point and shoot these days it's quite likely that he was just using what was around to attempt to document the whole experience so that he had as much evidence as to what actually happened as he could get in case it backfired on him.

A google image search for "female lapd officer" (there's a lot of potential triggers for violence in that results-- lots of news articles, repeat the search with care) finds a fair few officers wearing nail polish. (Also, most nail polish is high gloss, or at least glossy, and would show up like that on a camera lens. Nitpicky detail, I know, but it's not like high gloss nail polish is something that it even takes a manicure to get-- you can have nails that long naturally, and you can apply the fake ones yourself.)
posted by NoraReed at 12:30 AM on December 7, 2012


Is the price inclusive of VAT over there yet?
posted by infini at 12:36 AM on December 7, 2012


Not sure if I should be surprised that it took so long or disappointed that someone hasn't dissected the supposed price more thoroughly.

Sure, why not.

I count six mason jars and a full bag. And he says there's an additional 55 'items', which it seems is the bags of hash and the duffel the bag itself.

A gram at a quality dispensary in LA is around 20 bucks. Price break for a full ounce usually comes out to around $300. Hash is around 25 a gram. Here's the menu at a dispensary in West Hollywood for reference. And another one in LA.

Out of the 49 non mason jar 'items,' I'd guess it's about 20 bags of hash and 29 bags of dope, to go along with the 6 mason jars. Those hash bags look like around a quarter ounce apiece, maybe a half ounce with some of them. Let's split the difference, and say 7 1/2 ounces (around a quarter pound) of hash. By the gram that comes to $5,250 for the 7 1/2 ounces of hash. That's without any kind of break for amount, that's by the gram.

The thing with the bags of pot is high quality pot like that is deceptively fluffy. What looks like SO MUCH DOPE really isn't. Well, it's still a lot, but not crazytown marijuana Scarface or anything.

I'd hazard each bag is half a pound. And the mason jars maybe a quarter pound apiece. That would be 16 pounds. If we give the benefit of the doubt on the bag being around 20 pounds total (including the weight of the jars and the bag itself) and round up to 17 pounds of dope to be safe, we get 272 ounces. And let's just say it's real nice pot and it's around $325 an ounce. So that's $88,400 retail in a dispensary.

Combining those totals gets right under $93,650 retail at your local pot shop. But again, buying in bulk makes it cheaper than measuring by the ounce or gram. It's around $3,000 a pound of weed from the grower, (source) and $400 an ounce for hash, making it around $40,000 right above retail: the dispensary supplier. Almost certainly what this was.

Still something a guy would miss, but I'd guess it's what a busy dispensary turns in a week.
posted by joechip at 12:51 AM on December 7, 2012 [2 favorites]


Some of you guys are way too skeptical about things. If you really think this is fake, you're welcome to call Sergeant Adrienne Legaspi at the LAPD Office of Operations yourself and check. But I probably wouldn't waste her time if I were you.
posted by Justinian at 12:56 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


Kind of ironic to be reading this in the state of Washington today. I don't really have a back yard, but if I found a big bag of weed on my porch, I'd spark up and wait for the owner to come back.....
posted by lumpenprole at 1:13 AM on December 7, 2012


If it's fake, then the L.A. Times has been taken in. By one of their former reporters.
posted by drjimmy11 at 1:26 AM on December 7, 2012


I think the main reason for this being fake is that he links to his startup 'photo game' app in the body of the post. In the words of Elaine: Faaake. Fake. Fake. Faaaaake. It's a viral ad.
posted by jimmythefish at 1:27 AM on December 7, 2012


Not real.
Evidence: "Supervisor" isn't wearing any gloves and looks like a porn star.
Verdict: Viral (ewww) advertising for a porno.


So you think a porn movie producer would be dumb enough to use the name of a real LAPD sergeant (pdf)?
posted by gingerest at 1:32 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


Well, it's fairly easy to confirm that LAPD does have a Sgt Adrienne Legaspi (and in previous years has had Adrienne Legaspis of lower rank). Five minutes didn't turn up a photo of her I could compare to the blogger's photo, or information on her nail polish habits, but if I were faking up a fakey fake blog post I probably wouldn't invite trouble by using real officers' names.

I'd guess the links are just there because he's a blogger and startup game writer, he links to his stuff as a form of self-promotion, that's a habit and not one he's going to suppress if he's writing something that will probably get lots of hits.
posted by hattifattener at 1:35 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


It seems that self linking is not an issue on most sites, but this aspect does tend to raise the quality bar at Metafilter.
posted by infini at 2:03 AM on December 7, 2012


Does no one realise the porn thing was a joke, or am I missing some over-thinking joke?

Also, I thought "medical" pot in the US was a watered down variety, with much of the THC stripped out. Did I understand wrong?
posted by Mezentian at 2:28 AM on December 7, 2012


Also, I thought "medical" pot in the US was a watered down variety, with much of the THC stripped out. Did I understand wrong?

You did. Medical marijuana from dispensaries is very potent and quite good. It is produced by independent growers. There were previous attempts to make THC pills by pharmaceutical companies, and supposedly there was pot grown by he federal govt for medicinal purposes and research, but those are different things.
posted by OmieWise at 3:12 AM on December 7, 2012


I hope by now we all agree that this isn't fake, but just in case you're holding out, explain to me where the author got 175,000$-ish worth of marijuana (legal or otherwise) for these photos. Dem buds be real.
posted by sixohsix at 3:20 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


and supposedly there was pot grown by he federal govt for medicinal purposes and research,

That might be where I got the wrong end of the stick.
Fancy that.

Bizarre to think the US has gone from "I did not inhale" to legalisation/decriminalisation in about 20 years. I believe we had a small period of decriminalisation, but it ended when a new govt came in.

Nasty stuff. Call me when acid legal though.
posted by Mezentian at 3:49 AM on December 7, 2012


louche mustachio: "Exceptional tagging work, sir"

I don't know how weed came to be known as "trees", but it's kind of annoying if you're looking for information about actual trees, or if you go to reddit and r/trees thinking for some reason there would be links about actual trees there. Though I suppose the same frustration goes for people searching for information about "weeds" or "herbs" or "chronic cough".
posted by Red Loop at 4:34 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


Though I suppose the same frustration goes for people searching for information about "weeds" or "herbs" or "chronic cough".

I was just looking to get "blazed out of my mind" on Capri-Sun and GoGurt; what are all these drug links?
posted by Greg Nog at 4:53 AM on December 7, 2012 [6 favorites]


There were previous attempts to make THC pills by pharmaceutical companies

That's called Marinol. Been on the market for at least a decade. Apparently if it's expensive and cultivated in a lab it's a safe Schedule III, but if it grows in a plant for free it's dangerous Schedule I.
posted by ook at 7:08 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


abusing edit window to

Do not abuse the edit window. Thank you.
posted by cortex at 8:03 AM on December 7, 2012 [2 favorites]


* offers edit window a cookie*
posted by infini at 8:21 AM on December 7, 2012 [4 favorites]



So you think a porn movie producer would be dumb enough to use the name of a real LAPD sergeant?


While known for their keen sense of verisimilitude, I do agree the producers of Hot Pot Cop Bangers 7: Backyard Hole-Hiders would be wise enough to to do their due diligence and avoid unintentionally slandering a law officer.
posted by Cookiebastard at 8:43 AM on December 7, 2012 [2 favorites]


Dope dope dope dope
posted by growabrain at 8:44 AM on December 7, 2012


Ka-ching
posted by growabrain at 8:47 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


Big_B: "Evidence: "Supervisor" isn't wearing any gloves and looks like a porn star."

(Quoting myself)

Yeah sorry, did not mean or even see my comment as misogynist, so sorry if it was taken that way. It was just immediately striking to me that this supervisor has very nice nails (which seems odd for any police/fire/other service type of person) and was not wearing gloves which is pretty standard procedure. And then I went for the cheap porno joke.

My apologies.
posted by Big_B at 8:58 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


I feel like the ticktockman.
posted by infini at 9:00 AM on December 7, 2012


Let us go rob the man with fifty machineguns.

An excellent plan.


Yeah, it is not like there are close to half a million gun thefts a year.
posted by srboisvert at 9:12 AM on December 7, 2012


When no one was looking, some asshole
took fifty machine guns. He took 50 machine guns.
That’s as many as five tens.
And that’s terrible.

posted by griphus at 9:26 AM on December 7, 2012


Let us go rob the man with fifty machineguns.

An excellent plan.


I have taken
the guns
that were on
the table

and which
you were probably
saving
for movie props

Forgive me
they were unloaded
so automated
and so cold
posted by xchmp at 9:59 AM on December 7, 2012 [13 favorites]


I hope by now we all agree that this isn't fake

I remain unconvinced, mostly by the look of it. I am the Karl Rove of this thread.
posted by jimmythefish at 10:13 AM on December 7, 2012


joechip: "Those hash bags look like around a quarter ounce apiece, maybe a half ounce with some of them."

Well, in the close-up the bag of hash on top (the White Russian Super Lemon Haze Bubble Mix) is marked "33.6 g" which, if signifying weight, would put it at just over one ounce. There's another bag below that which is clearly marked 0.735 oz in red pen. So you may want to consider your estimate to be a bit low, if anything.
posted by caution live frogs at 10:34 AM on December 7, 2012


Meanwhile, in Birmingham, England...
posted by Wordshore at 11:01 AM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


jimmythefish: But the rentacops all went home and I was stuck with guns and no ammo, and everyone knew it.

Unlike the movies, though, the worst that would have happened is that Thug X would have tapped on your door and simply taken them. I'd think that they'd not want to cause more trouble for themselves when they knew you were a dude who'd rented his apartment for a movie shoot. Why would splattering it with your brains make any sense?
I think I see the flaw in your logic.

In my extraordinarily limited knowledge of armed robbery of weapons caches, ... I wouldn't have even stayed there. Paper over the window quickly and leave.
posted by IAmBroom at 1:27 PM on December 7, 2012


That supervisor didn't tally the count right...how much did she really miss, and what happened to it all afterwards? That LAPD Holiday Party is going to be AWESOME this year!
posted by Chuffy at 2:21 PM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


And the mason jars maybe a quarter pound apiece.

Two of them are quart jars but the other four are only pint jars. I know a guy who has a freezer full of jars like that and he puts an ounce in each pint jar. The jars in the picture don't look like they're packed any tighter than his, so I'd guess that all six mason jars in the article's stash added up to no more than half a pound.
posted by Mars Saxman at 2:22 PM on December 7, 2012


A co-worker once threw me ten baggies "of a white substance" under the counter just before a bounty hunter came in to arrest her for jumping bail. As she was being hauled-off she told me to call her mother. The bounty hunter told me to call no one.

I called her mother. She arrived and I handed over the baggies and the knot. Crazy.
posted by TangerineGurl at 6:52 PM on December 7, 2012


She arrived and I handed over the baggies and the knot.

The knot?
posted by Kraftmatic Adjustable Cheese at 11:57 PM on December 7, 2012 [1 favorite]


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