"I see you're using the clever 'not moving' ploy..."
July 26, 2014 6:34 PM   Subscribe

Kitten vs Statue. [slyt | cute]
posted by quin (42 comments total) 33 users marked this as a favorite

 
I started playing it, and one of my cats RAN in from the other room and tried to fight my computer. So thanks.
posted by roomthreeseventeen at 6:49 PM on July 26, 2014 [6 favorites]


Please do not post cute kitten things that make me want to get another kitten.

Every one of my kittens has grown into a cat.

With catatudes.
posted by BlueHorse at 6:52 PM on July 26, 2014 [21 favorites]


GLARE swatswat NINJA-ROLL swat MEW glare NINJA-ROLL swatswat CHOMP
posted by sandettie light vessel automatic at 7:02 PM on July 26, 2014 [5 favorites]


Great video but even greater Inspector Clouseau title. Well done!
posted by Purposeful Grimace at 7:06 PM on July 26, 2014 [3 favorites]


Great. Now I want to get a cat statue. It certainly doesn't help that I have a Ralph that looks like the kitten and a Sunny that looks like the statue.
posted by neilbert at 7:08 PM on July 26, 2014


This one night, my housemate brought a life-size cutout of Jeff Gordon home from the 7-11 he worked at. The next morning, I had pretty much the same reaction.
posted by klarck at 7:08 PM on July 26, 2014 [24 favorites]


I just got kittens a couple weeks ago, but they aren't nearly as bananas as that one.

I think this is a good thing?
posted by aubilenon at 7:17 PM on July 26, 2014


BOTTLEBRUSH TAIL.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 7:20 PM on July 26, 2014 [7 favorites]


You know, some days I think I'm just about done with this whole "cats on the Internet" thing, and then along comes some ridiculous little punk-ass kitten like this one who just UPS THEIR GAME TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL.

Well played, sproingy little fuzzball, well played.
posted by drlith at 7:23 PM on July 26, 2014 [5 favorites]


I have no idea what it was trying to do at the 37 second mark but the result was awesome.
posted by bowmaniac at 7:25 PM on July 26, 2014


This video made me weirdly sad. The kitten is just all alone with this inanimate object. It wants to play and it's kinda scared at the same time and it is squeaking.

SOMEONE PLAY WITH THAT KITTEN IMMEDIATELY.
posted by maryr at 7:27 PM on July 26, 2014 [31 favorites]


thank you. really.
posted by lalunamel at 7:30 PM on July 26, 2014


Zeuxis lives!
posted by le_vert_galant at 7:42 PM on July 26, 2014


It pulls out all the stops, employing every "get the other kitten to play" ploy it knows, all to no avail. Very entertaining.
posted by Mental Wimp at 8:04 PM on July 26, 2014


Later on, he dives from the kitchen table and wrestles it to the floor. So who wins now, statue cat?
posted by arcticseal at 8:54 PM on July 26, 2014


That is one pissed-off kitten. Owners best have checked their pillows that night before they laid their heads down.
posted by Pudhoho at 9:04 PM on July 26, 2014 [2 favorites]


Where can I acquire one of these statues? Just asking for my cats.
posted by jeather at 9:06 PM on July 26, 2014 [2 favorites]


There seem to be some dog characteristics in that kitten.

whats with the swinging of tail and rolling with all feet splayed? Is that normal? as in do kittens do that?
posted by TheLittlePrince at 9:13 PM on July 26, 2014


oh god the little sideways hops
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 9:17 PM on July 26, 2014 [1 favorite]


I love those little corkscrew/somersault ninja rolls! "I'm attacking! But I'm just playing, see, I'm upside-down! Attack!"
posted by blnkfrnk at 9:32 PM on July 26, 2014 [3 favorites]


whats with the swinging of tail and rolling with all feet splayed? Is that normal? as in do kittens do that?

A quickly flipping tail that is puffed out is a display of anger, fear, or aggression in a housecat. A quickly flipping tail that is not puffed out is a display of discontent and demanding. A slowly swaying tail is a sign of content.

The rolling on the back with the feet splayed is an interesting thing because 1) it exposes all the vulnerable bits to the enemy, but 2) it puts all the potentially harmful parts of the cat into play. A cat who can manage to grab its pray with its forelimbs will use its hind legs in a clawing / digging motion that can potentially disembowel its opponent. If it can't get a hold, at least it can do a lot of swiping damage from all four paws.
posted by hippybear at 9:35 PM on July 26, 2014 [5 favorites]


this is like an episode of the twilight zone for kittens
posted by The Whelk at 9:57 PM on July 26, 2014 [10 favorites]


1) it exposes all the vulnerable bits to the enemy, but 2) it puts all the potentially harmful parts of the cat into play.

"I keep forgetting that five of his six ends are pointy when he lies like that." -- Calvin
posted by radwolf76 at 12:16 AM on July 27, 2014 [8 favorites]


My cat uses all of these fighting techniques (especially the sideways hopping) on chicken necks when she gets them for dinner. Which is the main reason we keep feeding her the horrible slimy things.
posted by lollusc at 12:25 AM on July 27, 2014 [3 favorites]


Looks fun, but I worry what biting that statue would do to that poor kitten's teeth.
posted by YAMWAK at 2:13 AM on July 27, 2014


The squeaking! I die.
posted by flyingsquirrel at 5:22 AM on July 27, 2014 [4 favorites]


I worry what biting that statue would do to that poor kitten's teeth.

Probably not, for two reasons; first, kittens, like human children, have baby teeth that grow out, somewhere between six and nine months of age, so on the slim chance that they were damaged, the odds are good that it would be on a tooth that is only temporary.

This leads me to the second reason; kittens rarely bite with full force (the full force you'd see from a full grown cat, that is.) It may not seem like it when you are playing with one and get a handful of mouth razors, but most of the time they are just testing to see if you are soft enough and don't fight back too hard so that they know it is safe to eat you.

Of course, this could be a particularly stupid kitten, so if the second reason wasn't at work, take comfort in the fact that the first one is there to protect it from itself.
posted by quin at 9:14 AM on July 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


Thanks quin, that means I can enjoy the clip a lot more.
posted by YAMWAK at 9:54 AM on July 27, 2014


I still don't understand how human scientists haven't discovered and harnessed whatever it is that powers the feline anti-gravity booster. I'm sure the cat scientists would willingly share their tech if we would quit shooing them off of the laptop keyboards.
posted by billyfleetwood at 10:20 AM on July 27, 2014


The squeaking! I die.

My little black squeaky fuzzball grew into a normal-sized black squeaky fuzzball. She KNOWS her squeak makes me keel over. She deploys it with precisely-calculated maximum squee devastation. "Hello my favorite human! Look, I am flopping on the floor with my tummy in the air right after disemboweling your shoes. Mweep! *squirmsquirm-swattypaws* Mwap! *purrpurr* Ohhh human you're patting my tummy! Chirp chirp!" Slays me every time.

She also deploys ANGRY BOTTLEBRUSH TAIL and ARCHED-BACK FOUR-PAW POUNCE every evening a.k.a. Ritual Cat Battle. Essentially, my big Maine Coon fluffball plays the part of Orange Statue Cat. Except he eventually flips his ears back and smacks her. Then she full-body tackles him. Loads of fun to watch.
posted by fraula at 2:16 PM on July 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


Fraula, video please.
posted by computech_apolloniajames at 2:47 PM on July 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


MetaFilter: this could be a particularly stupid kitten.
posted by XQUZYPHYR at 3:39 PM on July 27, 2014 [1 favorite]


That kitten was too horny for my taste. He wanted to put his butt in another cat's face. Dirty cat.
posted by QueerAngel28 at 5:22 PM on July 27, 2014


Way to make a primate feel like semi-animated sludge, cat.
posted by jamjam at 7:00 PM on July 27, 2014


first, kittens, like human children, have baby teeth that grow out, somewhere between six and nine months of age, so on the slim chance that they were damaged, the odds are good that it would be on a tooth that is only temporary.

Wait wait wait. My cat had teeth fall out and I didn't even notice?
posted by maryr at 10:11 PM on July 27, 2014


Sounds like some tooth fairy is overdue on the salmon-flavored treats under the pillow.
posted by radwolf76 at 11:52 PM on July 27, 2014 [2 favorites]


maryr, I took my kittens to the vet last week where we got to talking about cats' baby teeth, and apparently the baby teeth usually fall out while the cat's eating, and they just swallow them. Which there is no kitty tooth fairy (that also came up with the vet, so I know the tooth fairy part is a medical fact)
posted by aubilenon at 8:10 AM on July 28, 2014 [2 favorites]


I had a foster kittens and they just left tiny little kitten teeth everywhere.
posted by jeather at 8:48 AM on July 28, 2014 [1 favorite]


Mine are leaving tiny bite marks everywhere
posted by aubilenon at 9:13 AM on July 28, 2014


Kittens on carpet are just the most mind-bendingly, inertia-defying things there are. How do you move like that, tiny kitten?
posted by Imperfect at 2:47 PM on July 28, 2014


One theory about why cats sleep so much ( aside from naps being awesome) is having to converse energy for sitting motionless for long periods and then BOUNCING INTO TRIPLE BODY LENGTH GYMNASTIC FEATS
posted by The Whelk at 5:13 PM on July 28, 2014


Tiny little kitten teeth!
posted by lollusc at 10:14 PM on July 31, 2014


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