Is this how Tasha and Data did it?
October 31, 2016 3:47 PM Subscribe
Look, next time aliens demand sex for helping you escape, remember that they probably don't know a damn thing about how humans actually do it (SFW).
So the wiki has it that Noonian Soong's wife was killed, and he himself was presumed dead, after the colony on Omicron Theta was attacked by the Crystalline Entity.
But in fact he retreated to some remote location, where he set about making fully-functional and anatomically correct androids that looked like him.
Noonian Soong, in short, was a guy who knew how to have a good time.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 4:17 PM on October 31, 2016 [5 favorites]
But in fact he retreated to some remote location, where he set about making fully-functional and anatomically correct androids that looked like him.
Noonian Soong, in short, was a guy who knew how to have a good time.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 4:17 PM on October 31, 2016 [5 favorites]
Tags: yesThatsLilithFromFrasier
Ha! I didn't see that until after I'd watched the first clip and thought to myself, "hey, weird, she has facial and speech mannerisms a lot like Lilith's. I wonder who the actress is."
(also, technically she was a character in Cheers, just made a cameo in Frasier, but we'll let that pass)
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:20 PM on October 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
Ha! I didn't see that until after I'd watched the first clip and thought to myself, "hey, weird, she has facial and speech mannerisms a lot like Lilith's. I wonder who the actress is."
(also, technically she was a character in Cheers, just made a cameo in Frasier, but we'll let that pass)
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:20 PM on October 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
The Ryker alien sex episode was so deliciously meta in that scene. The one that comes closest is the Voyager episode where the crew compete to create self-insert fanfic of themselves.
posted by CBrachyrhynchos at 4:32 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by CBrachyrhynchos at 4:32 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
This is missing the rishathra tag.
posted by EndsOfInvention at 4:51 PM on October 31, 2016 [6 favorites]
posted by EndsOfInvention at 4:51 PM on October 31, 2016 [6 favorites]
(also, technically she was a character in Cheers, just made a cameo in Frasier, but we'll let that pass)
Bebe Neuwith as 'Dr. Lilith Sternin' appeared in 80 episodes of 'Cheers' over its last 8 seasons and 12 episodes of 'Frasier' in its 10 seasons. The producers of Frasier were reluctant to have her on the show at all and her first appearance was "a very special episode", but when your show runs 10 years you have to go back to old tropes from time to time. Still, as 'Frasier's ex-wife', she is inevitably more associated with the show's title character than the show where he was part of an ensemble cast. But I digress. I still would've preferred a Cliff Claven spin-off after the original series ended, but the less said about "The Tortellis" the better. But I digress.
posted by oneswellfoop at 5:11 PM on October 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
Bebe Neuwith as 'Dr. Lilith Sternin' appeared in 80 episodes of 'Cheers' over its last 8 seasons and 12 episodes of 'Frasier' in its 10 seasons. The producers of Frasier were reluctant to have her on the show at all and her first appearance was "a very special episode", but when your show runs 10 years you have to go back to old tropes from time to time. Still, as 'Frasier's ex-wife', she is inevitably more associated with the show's title character than the show where he was part of an ensemble cast. But I digress. I still would've preferred a Cliff Claven spin-off after the original series ended, but the less said about "The Tortellis" the better. But I digress.
posted by oneswellfoop at 5:11 PM on October 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
Does Data actually shoot his bolt during coitus? If so, what is he shooting and how does he replenish following emission?
posted by biffa at 5:14 PM on October 31, 2016
posted by biffa at 5:14 PM on October 31, 2016
Nanites
posted by wabbittwax at 5:22 PM on October 31, 2016 [5 favorites]
posted by wabbittwax at 5:22 PM on October 31, 2016 [5 favorites]
Tasha Yar survived a planet with rape gangs and then ended up having sex with Data while unable to give consent, so I am really hoping it was the Susan Ivanova version.
posted by dinty_moore at 5:23 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by dinty_moore at 5:23 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
Does Data actually shoot his bolt during coitus?
Androids are really tired of this sort of insensitive joke.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:43 PM on October 31, 2016 [4 favorites]
Androids are really tired of this sort of insensitive joke.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:43 PM on October 31, 2016 [4 favorites]
(also, technically she was a character in Cheers, just made a cameo in Frasier, but we'll let that pass)
Bebe Neuwith as 'Dr. Lilith Sternin' appeared in 80 episodes of 'Cheers' over its last 8 seasons and 12 episodes of 'Frasier'
Okay, so she made 12 cameos. :)
posted by Greg_Ace at 5:49 PM on October 31, 2016
Bebe Neuwith as 'Dr. Lilith Sternin' appeared in 80 episodes of 'Cheers' over its last 8 seasons and 12 episodes of 'Frasier'
Okay, so she made 12 cameos. :)
posted by Greg_Ace at 5:49 PM on October 31, 2016
>what is he shooting and how does he replenish following emission?
Hope this helps:
"The first Baby Alive doll was introduced by Kenner in 1973. It could be fed food packets mixed with water... this version did not speak, so you had to check the diaper a few moments after feeding. It also produced droppings and threw up regularly."
"In 1992 the first talking Baby Alive doll was produced. There were sensors located inside the doll to detect what stage the food was at, and trigger its voice to say "I have to go potty" or "All done now." These dolls did not sell well due to the loud gear noises and her 'deep adult voice.' "
tl;dr: threw up regularly, deep adult voice. I'm dyin'.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 5:50 PM on October 31, 2016 [13 favorites]
Hope this helps:
"The first Baby Alive doll was introduced by Kenner in 1973. It could be fed food packets mixed with water... this version did not speak, so you had to check the diaper a few moments after feeding. It also produced droppings and threw up regularly."
"In 1992 the first talking Baby Alive doll was produced. There were sensors located inside the doll to detect what stage the food was at, and trigger its voice to say "I have to go potty" or "All done now." These dolls did not sell well due to the loud gear noises and her 'deep adult voice.' "
tl;dr: threw up regularly, deep adult voice. I'm dyin'.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 5:50 PM on October 31, 2016 [13 favorites]
Q: What do you like?posted by audi alteram partem at 6:21 PM on October 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
Lt. Cmdr. Data: Although I do not require sustenance, I occasionally ingest a semi-organic nutrient suspension in a silicone-based liquid medium.
Q: Is it good?
Lt. Cmdr. Data: It would be more accurate to say it is good for me, as it lubricates my bio-functions.
Sing Or Swim: "So the wiki has it that Noonian Soong's wife was killed, and he himself was presumed dead, after the colony on Omicron Theta was attacked by the Crystalline Entity.
But in fact he retreated to some remote location, where he set about making fully-functional and anatomically correct androids that looked like him.
Noonian Soong, in short, was a guy who knew how to have a good time."
Man, I wouldn't do me...
Greg_Ace: "Tags: yesThatsLilithFromFrasier
Ha! I didn't see that until after I'd watched the first clip and thought to myself, "hey, weird, she has facial and speech mannerisms a lot like Lilith's. I wonder who the actress is."
(also, technically she was a character in Cheers, just made a cameo in Frasier, but we'll let that pass)"
The voice jumped right out at me. I am a bad, bad MeFi and frequently never get around at looking at the tags.
posted by Samizdata at 6:39 PM on October 31, 2016
But in fact he retreated to some remote location, where he set about making fully-functional and anatomically correct androids that looked like him.
Noonian Soong, in short, was a guy who knew how to have a good time."
Man, I wouldn't do me...
Greg_Ace: "Tags: yesThatsLilithFromFrasier
Ha! I didn't see that until after I'd watched the first clip and thought to myself, "hey, weird, she has facial and speech mannerisms a lot like Lilith's. I wonder who the actress is."
(also, technically she was a character in Cheers, just made a cameo in Frasier, but we'll let that pass)"
The voice jumped right out at me. I am a bad, bad MeFi and frequently never get around at looking at the tags.
posted by Samizdata at 6:39 PM on October 31, 2016
The best part about Babylon 5 was that it was mostly about the Membari having a philosophical and spiritual crisis amongst themselves that they tried to hash out using Humans as "Noble Savages", while the Centauri and the Narn needed to use the helpless little humans as living shields against one another while reconciling between them, and the Vorlons and the Shadows saw the humans as game pieces to leverage against the other powers in their own Great Game, and the Humans go and do shit like this. Humans always go and do shit like this, constantly. It is no goddamn accident Garibaldi is a Looney Tunes fan.
It's the second most important reason the Vulcans put up with our shit.
I find it satisfying that we are Coyote and Spider and Monkey in our visions of ourselves as a star-faring species.
posted by Slap*Happy at 7:38 PM on October 31, 2016 [10 favorites]
It's the second most important reason the Vulcans put up with our shit.
I find it satisfying that we are Coyote and Spider and Monkey in our visions of ourselves as a star-faring species.
posted by Slap*Happy at 7:38 PM on October 31, 2016 [10 favorites]
(This is in response to the second link, where Commander Ivanova out of uniform with her hair down is the perfect anti-fan-service.)
posted by Slap*Happy at 7:50 PM on October 31, 2016
posted by Slap*Happy at 7:50 PM on October 31, 2016
I still would've preferred a Cliff Claven spin-off after the original series ended, but the less said about "The Tortellis" the better. But I digress.
After it was announced that there was going to be spin off with one of the characters from Cheers, but before it was announced to be Fraiser someone (Letterman?) suggested the new show would be called, "Hi, my name is Norm and I'm an alcoholic."
posted by ActingTheGoat at 7:54 PM on October 31, 2016 [3 favorites]
After it was announced that there was going to be spin off with one of the characters from Cheers, but before it was announced to be Fraiser someone (Letterman?) suggested the new show would be called, "Hi, my name is Norm and I'm an alcoholic."
posted by ActingTheGoat at 7:54 PM on October 31, 2016 [3 favorites]
The first clip is what made me a Bebe Neuwith fan for life - and branded the line "I've always wanted to make love with an alien" on my brain.
(where it competes with "You are smart, you will make us go," and "If there's nothing wrong with me, there must be something wrong with the universe!" for most quoted, but is sadly losing as it's never quite as universally applicable as those two.)
posted by jb at 9:08 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
(where it competes with "You are smart, you will make us go," and "If there's nothing wrong with me, there must be something wrong with the universe!" for most quoted, but is sadly losing as it's never quite as universally applicable as those two.)
posted by jb at 9:08 PM on October 31, 2016 [1 favorite]
>Man, I wouldn't do me...
Well, when he appears on the show he's about four hundred years old and crinkly. But Soong was making simulacra of himself (Soongulacra?) in his prime. Surely everybody would do themselves in their prime.
...I mean, I wouldn't if you wouldn't. Oh, hey, look at the time.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 9:20 PM on October 31, 2016
Well, when he appears on the show he's about four hundred years old and crinkly. But Soong was making simulacra of himself (Soongulacra?) in his prime. Surely everybody would do themselves in their prime.
...I mean, I wouldn't if you wouldn't. Oh, hey, look at the time.
posted by Sing Or Swim at 9:20 PM on October 31, 2016
Having sex with aliens can give you weird dreams.
As long as both parties are eager and willing, different types of body parts isn't a hindrance, but is something you can take advantage of.
posted by eye of newt at 11:32 PM on October 31, 2016 [3 favorites]
As long as both parties are eager and willing, different types of body parts isn't a hindrance, but is something you can take advantage of.
posted by eye of newt at 11:32 PM on October 31, 2016 [3 favorites]
This is William T. "I'll be on Holodeck Four" Riker. This is not a man afraid of innovation.
posted by mobunited at 11:58 PM on October 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by mobunited at 11:58 PM on October 31, 2016 [2 favorites]
And, once again, because it's relevant...
Q: Worst job on the Enterprise?
A: Mop duty on the holodecks.
posted by Thorzdad at 4:15 AM on November 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
Q: Worst job on the Enterprise?
A: Mop duty on the holodecks.
posted by Thorzdad at 4:15 AM on November 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
SomethingAwful's "Life and Times of a Holodeck Janitor" (probably NSFW).
posted by EndsOfInvention at 5:04 AM on November 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by EndsOfInvention at 5:04 AM on November 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
The later Trek series don't get nearly as much love on the blue as TNG and DS9--and that's somewhat justified, as Voyager and Enterprise could be described as one missed opportunity after another--but there was one interesting episode of ENT, "Unexpected", in which Trip Tucker (ship's engineer) plays some sort of game with an alien woman that involved sticking his hands in a pile of glowing pebbles, after which he finds that he's pregnant. There's also this hot hot scene of Q sex from VOY [NSFTAQ (not safe for the Alpha Quadrant)].
And then there's oo-mox, but I don't think that you hew-mons are ready for that.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:37 AM on November 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
And then there's oo-mox, but I don't think that you hew-mons are ready for that.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:37 AM on November 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
Goofy calisthenics aside, I kinda like the Crusher/Troi conversation for frank talk about short-term flings and sex outside of long-term relationships. Of course, then there's The Game which can be read as a metaphor for adolescent Wesley's worst nightmare, being confronted with the reality that everyone else, including his mother, has a sex life.
posted by CBrachyrhynchos at 8:55 AM on November 1, 2016
posted by CBrachyrhynchos at 8:55 AM on November 1, 2016
tl;dr [about "Baby Alive"]: threw up regularly, deep adult voice. I'm dyin'.
One of the funniest discussion threads I ever read was over in Livejournal, when someone posted a story about a malfunctioning Furby that was prone to speaking at unexpected moments, and the resultant yelps of surprise that it would inspire among unsuspecting listeners. A whole lot of other people chimed in with their own stories of malfunctioning Furbys, Elmos, Teddy Ruxpins...
I swear one of the responses I read was that someone's mother was so startled by a Talking Winnie the Pooh that she threw it out a window.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:16 AM on November 1, 2016
One of the funniest discussion threads I ever read was over in Livejournal, when someone posted a story about a malfunctioning Furby that was prone to speaking at unexpected moments, and the resultant yelps of surprise that it would inspire among unsuspecting listeners. A whole lot of other people chimed in with their own stories of malfunctioning Furbys, Elmos, Teddy Ruxpins...
I swear one of the responses I read was that someone's mother was so startled by a Talking Winnie the Pooh that she threw it out a window.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:16 AM on November 1, 2016
Dammit, now I gotta go find that thread...
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:16 AM on November 1, 2016
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:16 AM on November 1, 2016
I'm partial to Futurama's Snu Snu for depictions of alien sex. Partly because it features Bea Arthur sentencing our heroes to death by snu-snu, and partly because it has the most perfect animation loop ever.
posted by Nelson at 9:30 AM on November 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by Nelson at 9:30 AM on November 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
If you only know Bebe Neuwith from Frasier, you're missing a lot.
posted by CheeseDigestsAll at 11:14 AM on November 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
posted by CheeseDigestsAll at 11:14 AM on November 1, 2016 [2 favorites]
there was one interesting episode of ENT, "Unexpected", in which Trip Tucker (ship's engineer) plays some sort of game with an alien woman that involved sticking his hands in a pile of glowing pebbles, after which he finds that he's pregnant.
Somehow I saw this one about three times even while Enterprise was on the air, and it became kind of emblematic of bad Star Trek episodes (and Enterprise not being very good in general) to me. But I was a kid then - is it... actually better than I remember?
posted by atoxyl at 1:00 PM on November 1, 2016
Somehow I saw this one about three times even while Enterprise was on the air, and it became kind of emblematic of bad Star Trek episodes (and Enterprise not being very good in general) to me. But I was a kid then - is it... actually better than I remember?
posted by atoxyl at 1:00 PM on November 1, 2016
Not really, IMO. Despite the show being set a century before the original series, in an effort to avoid boldly going where other Trek shows had gone before, that basic plot could have been done in about any Trek series, or just about any other syndicated space opera, and the same was true for a lot of the episodes in the first two seasons. It was a little better in the third season, which had a season-long story arc, and a lot better in the fourth, which tied in a lot closer to TOS, but got cancelled just when it was really starting to pick up steam.
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:31 PM on November 1, 2016
posted by Halloween Jack at 2:31 PM on November 1, 2016
Unfortunately many of the Enterprise story arcs were tied up in Temporal Cold War material, which is the sort of time travel narrative that makes one want to go back and kill Hitler so that we don't get two generations of sloppy TV science fiction about killing Hitler paradoxes. The structure of Trek makes time travel stories especially annoying due to the mandatory reset at the end of the episode to the status quo. The Kelvin Timeline Reboot is one of the few violations of that principle.
The big story arcs also suffered from the curse of the traditional U.S. 26-episode season format. The story involved a ticking clock, but didn't have enough material to keep tension between the ticks.
posted by CBrachyrhynchos at 3:33 PM on November 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
The big story arcs also suffered from the curse of the traditional U.S. 26-episode season format. The story involved a ticking clock, but didn't have enough material to keep tension between the ticks.
posted by CBrachyrhynchos at 3:33 PM on November 1, 2016 [3 favorites]
MetaFilter: the sort of time travel narrative that makes one want to go back and kill Hitler so that we don't get two generations of sloppy TV science fiction about killing Hitler paradoxes
posted by oheso at 7:24 AM on November 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
posted by oheso at 7:24 AM on November 2, 2016 [1 favorite]
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This thread has been archived and is closed to new comments
Take a tip from a security chief, love that phat slut Tasha Yar
She discovered the pleasures of Data, he became her sexual pet
'Cause he's fully functional and anatomically correct
He's fully functional and anatomically correct
posted by SansPoint at 4:08 PM on October 31, 2016 [5 favorites]