"Wears sandals too much. No one wants to see your dusty feet.”
March 4, 2022 5:47 PM Subscribe
Selected Negative Teacher Evaluations of Jesus Christ. (SLMcSweeney's) "“Not what I expected. They say his area of specialty is carpentry, but we never built anything.”
“Won’t give straight answers. I asked him if something was going to be on the test, and he said, ‘You say that it will be,’ and stared at me with no expression. I mean, come on, bro.”
“Definitely plays favorites. Calls on the same twelve guys over and over. I even heard he took them out to dinner.”
“Won’t give straight answers. I asked him if something was going to be on the test, and he said, ‘You say that it will be,’ and stared at me with no expression. I mean, come on, bro.”
“Definitely plays favorites. Calls on the same twelve guys over and over. I even heard he took them out to dinner.”
OMG my stomach hurts
posted by The Underpants Monster at 6:13 PM on March 4, 2022 [3 favorites]
posted by The Underpants Monster at 6:13 PM on March 4, 2022 [3 favorites]
Keeps trying to give me piggy-back rides at the beach.
posted by zengargoyle at 6:23 PM on March 4, 2022 [49 favorites]
posted by zengargoyle at 6:23 PM on March 4, 2022 [49 favorites]
I immediately sent this to a bunch of people, very funny!
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 6:28 PM on March 4, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by dorothyisunderwood at 6:28 PM on March 4, 2022 [1 favorite]
See also the ratemyprofessors.com ratings of Master Yoda. (Speaking of spiritual leader / teachers who ask for or give piggy-back rides).
Favorite review:
Favorite review:
After Jedi 101 with Prof. Kenobi, I was excited to continue. However, Prof. Yoda is a mixed bag. He's very knowledgeable but his lectures are often confusing, as he speaks with bad syntax. Also, after practicing Force use on small stones, my midterm was lifting a whole starfighter out of a swamp. Final exam is "facing Vader", whatever that is.posted by Schmucko at 6:29 PM on March 4, 2022 [13 favorites]
dude has a 5000 for one special at 'Loaves and Fishes'.
posted by clavdivs at 6:35 PM on March 4, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by clavdivs at 6:35 PM on March 4, 2022 [1 favorite]
The last one! OMG
posted by potrzebie at 7:24 PM on March 4, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by potrzebie at 7:24 PM on March 4, 2022 [1 favorite]
Thank you for this.
posted by fruitslinger at 7:34 PM on March 4, 2022
posted by fruitslinger at 7:34 PM on March 4, 2022
Love these! The "he wasn't in his office" one, and the "took 3 days to get back to me!" one. But the "people pass the class even if they only attend the last session" is absolute gold.
posted by Zumbador at 7:44 PM on March 4, 2022 [19 favorites]
posted by Zumbador at 7:44 PM on March 4, 2022 [19 favorites]
Wears sandals too much. No one wants to see your dusty feet.”
'Except this one woman with really long hair who sits right up front and can’t seem to stop staring at them.
And half the time he acts like he can’t even see the other women in the class.'
posted by jamjam at 7:51 PM on March 4, 2022 [5 favorites]
'Except this one woman with really long hair who sits right up front and can’t seem to stop staring at them.
And half the time he acts like he can’t even see the other women in the class.'
posted by jamjam at 7:51 PM on March 4, 2022 [5 favorites]
Truly, I say to you, this is the best of the web.
posted by Clinging to the Wreckage at 7:59 PM on March 4, 2022 [18 favorites]
posted by Clinging to the Wreckage at 7:59 PM on March 4, 2022 [18 favorites]
"Unconventional & creative instructor! But after spring break, a rotating cast of adjuncts basically wrote-off the syllabus? Felt shortchanged, honestly."
posted by Iris Gambol at 8:32 PM on March 4, 2022 [21 favorites]
posted by Iris Gambol at 8:32 PM on March 4, 2022 [21 favorites]
I know, too soon.
posted by Iris Gambol at 8:32 PM on March 4, 2022 [3 favorites]
posted by Iris Gambol at 8:32 PM on March 4, 2022 [3 favorites]
"Weird format for a discussion class. He put everyone on one side of the table, so we can’t face each other when we talk.”
just imagine: Gary Larson.
posted by clavdivs at 8:55 PM on March 4, 2022 [2 favorites]
just imagine: Gary Larson.
posted by clavdivs at 8:55 PM on March 4, 2022 [2 favorites]
"Again with the bread. How many more lectures is he going to talk about wheat products? Some of us are celiac here."
"A bit temperamental. Saw him chasing people out of the student loans offices."
posted by Hardcore Poser at 9:02 PM on March 4, 2022 [14 favorites]
"A bit temperamental. Saw him chasing people out of the student loans offices."
posted by Hardcore Poser at 9:02 PM on March 4, 2022 [14 favorites]
clavdivs, betrayer of Gary Larson
posted by Iris Gambol at 9:34 PM on March 4, 2022 [10 favorites]
posted by Iris Gambol at 9:34 PM on March 4, 2022 [10 favorites]
Again with the bread.
...and what does he have against goats?
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 11:44 PM on March 4, 2022 [1 favorite]
...and what does he have against goats?
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 11:44 PM on March 4, 2022 [1 favorite]
...and what does he have against goats?
I'm convinced Jesus was headbutted by a goat as a little kid.
posted by clawsoon at 6:10 AM on March 5, 2022 [1 favorite]
I'm convinced Jesus was headbutted by a goat as a little kid.
posted by clawsoon at 6:10 AM on March 5, 2022 [1 favorite]
“ By week one, I was already tired of his anti-rich, pro-Samaritan bullshit. I wanted to take a course in Christianity, not liberalism.”
posted by Thorzdad at 6:46 AM on March 5, 2022 [19 favorites]
posted by Thorzdad at 6:46 AM on March 5, 2022 [19 favorites]
Progressive stack:
"A line of us had been waiting outside his office for over an hour. Finally, he showed up, said, ‘And the last shall be first,’ and started seeing us in reverse order."
posted by doctornemo at 8:30 AM on March 5, 2022 [1 favorite]
"A line of us had been waiting outside his office for over an hour. Finally, he showed up, said, ‘And the last shall be first,’ and started seeing us in reverse order."
posted by doctornemo at 8:30 AM on March 5, 2022 [1 favorite]
Dude tried to yoke me saying it would be NBD.
posted by srboisvert at 11:13 AM on March 5, 2022
posted by srboisvert at 11:13 AM on March 5, 2022
I can see now, but it was still rude.
Reminds me of the ex-leper from Life of Brian.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:41 PM on March 5, 2022 [2 favorites]
Reminds me of the ex-leper from Life of Brian.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:41 PM on March 5, 2022 [2 favorites]
I asked Professor Christ if having holes in his feet meant that he couldn't walk on water any more without sinking, and he facepalmed and asked his dad to forgive me because I knew not what I was doing. Negative attitude toward students plus tattling: 1 star.
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:04 PM on March 5, 2022 [3 favorites]
posted by Halloween Jack at 1:04 PM on March 5, 2022 [3 favorites]
He seems to know his beeswax, but his condescension is off-putting. His TAs are nitwits. I'm dropping this one next semester.
posted by mule98J at 2:30 PM on March 5, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by mule98J at 2:30 PM on March 5, 2022 [1 favorite]
Great lecturer, but the administration is, like, literally out to kill this guy. Not sure if he'll be around next semester.
posted by clawsoon at 5:12 PM on March 5, 2022 [8 favorites]
posted by clawsoon at 5:12 PM on March 5, 2022 [8 favorites]
"took 3 days to get back to me!"
*Chef's kiss*
posted by Paul Slade at 1:02 AM on March 6, 2022 [3 favorites]
*Chef's kiss*
posted by Paul Slade at 1:02 AM on March 6, 2022 [3 favorites]
Funny... I posted the link to Facebook, and it comes with an image. As far as I can tell, the image isn't displayed anywhere on the McSweeney's page; it is a Facebook-only attribute of the page.
posted by clawsoon at 4:43 AM on March 6, 2022
posted by clawsoon at 4:43 AM on March 6, 2022
Says he won't give any of us our grades until we're dead. Super fucking weird.
posted by clawsoon at 5:11 AM on March 6, 2022 [5 favorites]
posted by clawsoon at 5:11 AM on March 6, 2022 [5 favorites]
Funny... I posted the link to Facebook, and it comes with an image. As far as I can tell, the image isn't displayed anywhere on the McSweeney's page; it is a Facebook-only attribute of the page.
The image shows up in your grilled cheese sandwich.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 1:15 PM on March 6, 2022 [11 favorites]
The image shows up in your grilled cheese sandwich.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 1:15 PM on March 6, 2022 [11 favorites]
Claims to walk on water, but really that’s like a one inch deep fountain the administration put in the quad to honor civil rights and shit. And everyone just pisses in it at night on the way back to the dorms. So now he’s just Professor Piss Feet.
posted by inflatablekiwi at 9:07 PM on March 7, 2022 [1 favorite]
posted by inflatablekiwi at 9:07 PM on March 7, 2022 [1 favorite]
Kind of a weeper.
posted by Chitownfats at 1:52 PM on March 8, 2022 [2 favorites]
posted by Chitownfats at 1:52 PM on March 8, 2022 [2 favorites]
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TRUTH
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 5:51 PM on March 4, 2022 [8 favorites]