Planet of the... BASS

August 3, 2023 10:08 AM

Every European Dance Song in the 1990s

From the questionable syntax to the infectious techno groove, this could be the song of the summer — and the full single hasn't even dropped yet

posted by Etrigan (80 comments total)

Oops, unpaywalled RS article
posted by Etrigan at 10:09 AM on August 3, 2023 [1 favorite]

I found this on a Tumblr blog and: 10/10 no notes. Perfection.
posted by Kitteh at 10:09 AM on August 3, 2023 [3 favorites]

Having lived in Germany in the 90s, yes, oh so much yes.
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 10:28 AM on August 3, 2023 [4 favorites]

I like it a lot, but I feel like the grammatical angle is a bit overplayed.
posted by lumensimus at 10:32 AM on August 3, 2023 [4 favorites]

In case anyone thinks this is an exaggeration here, from '93, is Stakka Bo with Here We Go.
I love unapologetically love this stuff.
posted by thatwhichfalls at 10:34 AM on August 3, 2023 [19 favorites]

I think the grammar angle is part of the fun of the song. I look forward to hearing if the rest of it is good.

In spirit and a bit in tone it reminds me a bit of Vocal from Pet Shop Boys, a song that I feel is nearly perfect in every way.
posted by hippybear at 10:35 AM on August 3, 2023 [1 favorite]

The thing I live most about Tumblr is how quickly things mutate. It was maybe two days before there was fan art, and this gem,

SLEEP I want to try
Pillow is my favorite guy
REST I need some more
into bed where I go snore
PHEW I go honk and shoo
have a blanky feel the snooze
Tired system overload
Everybody SLEEEEEEPINGGGG

(By starlightknight@tumblr)
posted by seanmpuckett at 10:39 AM on August 3, 2023 [30 favorites]

for the beanplating: if you're curious to learn more about the background of That European Dance Pop 90s Sound, a potential starting point is Stereogum's The Number Ones (previously, recently), and specifically Breihan's retrospective on Ace of Base's "The Sign" (1994) and how that was a foundation laid by a Swedish DJ named Denniz Pop, who had a protege named Max Martin. Then follow that to the end of the decade where Pop+Max Martin become the driving force behind Britney Spears and N'Sync

This excerpt from the Ace of Base essay also feels particularly relevant

In John Seabrook’s book The Song Machine, Ulf Ekberg describes (Ace of Base)'s linguistic philosophy: “I think it was to our advantage that English is not our mother language because we are able to treat English very respectless and just look for the word that sounded good with the melody.” This would become the Swedish way — the shadowy art of melodic math. Many, many hit songs would adapt that same idea.

“The Sign” shows just how that form of Swedish pop music works. The song has a simple, memorable, endlessly catchy chorus, and it repeats that chorus about a million times. The sounds are all sharp and streamlined, and the song goes down so easily that you almost don’t notice how ridiculous it is. You can dismiss the lyrics, or you can look at them as a confounding poetic prism. That endless-repeat chorus ends with an open-ended question: “No one’s gonna drag you up to get into the light where you belong/ But where do you belong?” I don’t know, Ace Of Base. Where do I belong?

posted by bl1nk at 10:39 AM on August 3, 2023 [10 favorites]

No one’s gonna drag you up to get into the light where you belong

Huh! I'd always heard it as "No one's gonna drag you up 'til you get to the life where you belong", which is just about as catchily cryptic.
posted by lumensimus at 10:46 AM on August 3, 2023

I mean, this is a very accurate parody, but in a world where Scooter have sold tens of millions of albums, no parody of mitteleuropean techno is more ridiculous than the actual thing. For instance, here’s How Much Is the Fish?
posted by Kattullus at 10:47 AM on August 3, 2023 [18 favorites]

10/10 no notes. Perfection.

I love unapologetically love this stuff.

Same and same. So good. I still listen to this sort of thing all the damn time.

Bless you TikTok Euro Martha Wash and Freedom Williams for giving me a laugh and a smile today.
posted by May Kasahara at 10:49 AM on August 3, 2023 [3 favorites]

You could make a mix with this song and "Electronic Supersonik" by Zlad!
posted by stannate at 10:49 AM on August 3, 2023

The Fox says that the tradition continues.
posted by credulous at 10:50 AM on August 3, 2023

Random all-vest-no-shirt guy emphatically dancing eight feet away and whispering in all caps THAT'S RIGHT, THAT'S RIGHT.

That's right.
posted by mochapickle at 11:06 AM on August 3, 2023 [13 favorites]

It's a fun song/riff on the genre, just... don't look too much into the guy's other videos. I don't want to dead-goat things, so I'll leave it there, but if you think "Aha! I wonder what else he's done" you're probably better off sticking with the fun meme riffs.
posted by CrystalDave at 11:06 AM on August 3, 2023 [4 favorites]

The speed with which "Women are my favorite guy" became a Tumblr catchphrase was glorious to behold.
posted by EvaDestruction at 11:07 AM on August 3, 2023 [15 favorites]

Metafilter: I'm blue da ba dee da ba di
posted by alex_skazat at 11:13 AM on August 3, 2023 [6 favorites]

You can dismiss the lyrics, or you can look at them as a confounding poetic prism.

For those of you interested in this particular rabbit hole, I suggest digging up some of the Mountain Goats's live performances of "The Sign," which usually include an extended, endlessly changing patter about "a song by a country full of Protestants."
posted by praemunire at 11:13 AM on August 3, 2023 [5 favorites]

I was always sure it was:

“No one’s gonna drag you up to so get into the light where you belong/ But where do you belong?”

That seemed to make sense. But mostly I enjoyed making melodic mouth sounds along to this track while driving around with the windows down, because it was the 90s and everything was great.
posted by onetime dormouse at 11:30 AM on August 3, 2023 [4 favorites]

It's true, 90's eurodance reminds me of when I was young and healthy and had a sports car and didn't care about the climate or capitalism or really much of anything other than myself and my family, and we had it pretty good. Also, you know, the lack of self-eating irony in every piece of media was pretty great too. I'm not saying greed was good, and the seeds of today's destructive spiral were already planted, but for a lot of Gen-X the 90s were pretty great. And this melodically simple, rhythmically banging, futuristic-sounding music with soaring pads and vocals and throbbing basslines and is easy to dance to was the soundtrack for it.
posted by seanmpuckett at 11:38 AM on August 3, 2023 [11 favorites]

A musical renaissance first hinted at by the bass-forward sounds of Belgian techno anthem “Pump Up The Jam”
posted by Going To Maine at 11:40 AM on August 3, 2023 [24 favorites]

(The 90s: it was the least ironic of times, it was the most ironic of times)
posted by Going To Maine at 11:42 AM on August 3, 2023 [10 favorites]

This brings my list of things I don't hate about the Oculus all the way up to 1
posted by miles per flower at 11:46 AM on August 3, 2023 [3 favorites]

This dumbass clip has absolutely been my groove for the last few days. I don't remember the early 2000s well; they were a stew of studying, depression, and heavy drinking. But I do remember having a fantastic techno/Eurodance CD mix that's God knows where now. I listened to that thing in the car, at the computer, everywhere. Thanks for your comment, bl1nk; maybe I can pick up some other stuff to listen to.

I've been subscribed to Kyle Gordon's Insta for a while now, and he's fuck-off hilarious, although I didn't see this coming. He mostly does parodies of Types of Guy, often historical.
posted by Countess Elena at 12:19 PM on August 3, 2023 [3 favorites]

Everything about this is perfect but for me it's Biljana's facial expressions that top it
posted by windbox at 12:29 PM on August 3, 2023 [3 favorites]

Just makes me want to listen to Another Night by The Real McCoy. C'mon! Talk talk, I talk to you..
posted by fight or flight at 12:32 PM on August 3, 2023 [7 favorites]

credulous: The Fox says that the tradition continues.
Godsdamnit, my cue card says "The Fox was unavailable for comment."
posted by k3ninho at 12:48 PM on August 3, 2023 [2 favorites]

This is technically from the aughts, but: Stop the war.
(Stop your business. I pray for God. Yee, c'mon.)
posted by HeroZero at 1:16 PM on August 3, 2023 [3 favorites]

It wasn't just Europe. "Thats our law!!"
posted by Alison at 1:46 PM on August 3, 2023

Was this from Eurovision 2004, or 2005? It all runs together after a while.
posted by delfin at 1:52 PM on August 3, 2023 [2 favorites]

The guy's dance moves are giving me very specific techno viking vibes.
posted by HeroZero at 2:18 PM on August 3, 2023 [2 favorites]

That guy has fought a long court battle not to be called that.
posted by hippybear at 2:21 PM on August 3, 2023 [1 favorite]

I think I still have CDs containing booklets with the lyrics 'cyber system overload' printed in silver ink on neon backgrounds.
posted by cobaltnine at 2:28 PM on August 3, 2023 [6 favorites]

I want to like this but the video treatment really doesn't fit the genre. It needs crunchy green screen effects, animated psychedelic graphics, a segment in slow motion, a segment in black-and-white, maybe a few Video Toaster effects, and most importantly, terrible lip syncing because the model in the video isn't the singer.
posted by grahamparks at 2:34 PM on August 3, 2023 [4 favorites]

Quick correction to b1ink's post: there's quite a difference between eurodance and euro pop. The roots of eurodance trace back the late 80s, and have strong links to italodisco, hi-nrg, and even reggae (not to mention the U.S. house music that serves as the mothership).

Denniz Pop was involved in eurodance but that was before he founded Cheiron studios, when he was still part of SweMix. Important groups like Technotronic, Black Box, and Snap! had already released key records and laid the groundwork before Cheiron even existed.

By the time Max Martin came around in the middle of the 90s, eurodance was well establish. Martin was influenced by that sound with the pop he produced, not the other way around.

Dance Machine is a decent book, though.
posted by jordantwodelta at 3:03 PM on August 3, 2023 [7 favorites]

When I was in Germany in 1986-1987 I was confronted face on with Jack Your Body, which I think was the very earliest I'd heard anything like that before. I could be misremembering, of course.
posted by hippybear at 3:12 PM on August 3, 2023 [2 favorites]

See, this is why I have a soft spot for gabber. Gabber leaves out the lyrical interpretation parts and jumps straight to the DWOM DWOM DWOM DWOM full cardio workout program.
posted by delfin at 3:26 PM on August 3, 2023 [2 favorites]

Huh. And I'm looking and seeing Exit Planet Dust being 1995 but it's really something aside from all of this, isn't it?
posted by hippybear at 3:30 PM on August 3, 2023

[I really don't know from genres aside from broad strokes. Electronica encompasses Vangelis to Psychedelic Bubble Exploding In Your Mind for me, so I'm sure I'm mixing apples and off-road tires here.]
posted by hippybear at 3:32 PM on August 3, 2023 [1 favorite]

Exit Planet Dust falls under the "big beat" category, if that's helpful.
posted by jordantwodelta at 4:08 PM on August 3, 2023

Winner, 2024 Eurovision Song Contest
posted by lukemeister at 9:42 PM on August 3, 2023 [3 favorites]

In case anyone thinks this is an exaggeration here, from '93, is Stakka Bo with Here We Go .
I love unapologetically love this stuff.

There's a comment on the video along the lines of "this is REAL music, not that rubbish kids today listen to". Dude, I'm the same age as you. We weren't supposed to be like this when we grew up. We specifically talked about it. I remember.
posted by Harald74 at 11:07 PM on August 3, 2023 [12 favorites]

(As an aside, after the Stakka Bo video, YouTube served up this rather lovely rendition of How Deep Is Your Love with PJ Morton feat. Yebba)
posted by Harald74 at 11:12 PM on August 3, 2023 [1 favorite]

An eurocheese parody that does not include the line "wave your hands in the air like you just don't chair"?
posted by Pyrogenesis at 12:47 AM on August 4, 2023

Planet 1999 basically did an entire album of this concept three years ago.
posted by LeRoienJaune at 1:50 AM on August 4, 2023

I must just be too old to think this is funny. When people on Txitter started sharing this clip, I thought, as I so often do, that people younger than me with bad taste must have rediscovered something that sucked, and that their deficient taste buds had forced them to the mistaken conclusion that it was good. But then I realized that the joke must be that it sucked. But it actually sucked the first time. Only now the singers are making funny faces so you know they know it sucks. Okay.
posted by kittens for breakfast at 4:24 AM on August 4, 2023

Also on point in the genre: releasing a repackaging that attempts to remix the vibe of the original to target another marketing segment

(Same audio, downtempo visuals)
posted by persona at 4:39 AM on August 4, 2023

But then I realized that the joke must be that it sucked. But it actually sucked the first time. Only now the singers are making funny faces so you know they know it sucks. Okay.

I think you can be a bit more generous to the people who are enjoying this (I am) -- people contain multitudes, and it's entirely possible to

(a) know intellectually that something was not great in the first place;

(b) hold a nostalgic fondness for it anyway, either because your tastes were developing and you enjoyed it at the time but realize it's not so good now; or just because of its cultural-juggernaut status; or because it was really good at doing what it was supposed to do, and if you think it sucks that's kind of on you, and...

(c) really appreciate somebody's ability to apply a level of talent and analysis to create something that uncannily captures and amplifies its flaws, while being goofy enough to make you feel like you're in on the joke instead of being mocked.
posted by Shepherd at 5:07 AM on August 4, 2023 [18 favorites]

In the words of noted entertainment scholar TV's Frank: it's fun when it's fun!

I promise that there is a world of intense and serious music out there today, and not everything has to be that.

Honestly, I do feel the same way about a lot of 1990s and 2000s nostalgia, the later the worse. But then at that time it's all a smear of sadness to me.
posted by Countess Elena at 5:47 AM on August 4, 2023 [5 favorites]

I want to believe there's something in this that has Secret Value, but I think it's bound to be an ouroboros of irony, where one day people will be embarrassed to admit that they ever liked this thing they were only ever supposed to like ironically to begin with. Just have the courage to make something actually good!
posted by kittens for breakfast at 6:01 AM on August 4, 2023

Just have the courage to make something actually good!

If that was all it took, the world would be filled with wonders.
posted by zamboni at 6:24 AM on August 4, 2023 [4 favorites]

Worth noting that Ace of Base's Ulf Ekberg was (and may still be) a Neo-Nazi, and when you learn this, some of the lyrics in their hits come off a lot more... problematic.

That said, "Planet of the Bass" is a banger, and a spot-on parody of the genre. I lost it at "Everybody moooooovement!"
posted by SansPoint at 8:02 AM on August 4, 2023 [5 favorites]

PLOT TWIST
posted by Etrigan at 8:24 AM on August 4, 2023 [5 favorites]

Someone get Martha Wash for comment!
posted by cmfletcher at 8:28 AM on August 4, 2023 [1 favorite]

CLAPPING THE HANDS
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:38 AM on August 4, 2023 [2 favorites]

I am 100% certain this is part of the bit. There will be even more drama in the days to come, and the single itself will probably be a terrible remix, followed by a back-to-basics version, and then .... well you know.
posted by seanmpuckett at 8:39 AM on August 4, 2023 [5 favorites]

I want to believe there's something in this that has Secret Value, but I think it's bound to be an ouroboros of irony, where one day

I hope poking gentle fun at the excesses of one's youth, in a way that lets you simultaneously remember what was exciting about it to your younger self and yet recognize how silly it all was, never goes out of style.

(P.S. The silly faces are because the singers are lip-syncing badly in a language they don't speak.)
posted by praemunire at 10:18 AM on August 4, 2023 [6 favorites]

JUSTICE FOR BILJANA
posted by We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese at 11:03 AM on August 4, 2023 [8 favorites]

Groove Is In The Heart, baby.
posted by EllaEm at 1:01 PM on August 4, 2023 [4 favorites]

It may be hard to believe, but Lady Miss Kier was born in good ol' Youngstown, Ohio!
posted by praemunire at 1:39 PM on August 4, 2023 [2 favorites]

Wow, only three albums from Deee-Lite? I thought more. Sadness. We could use their happy funk in these dark and unhappy and decidedly unfunky days.
posted by hippybear at 1:42 PM on August 4, 2023 [4 favorites]

But then I realized that the joke must be that it sucked. But it actually sucked the first time. Only now the singers are making funny faces so you know they know it sucks.

I don't know, it kind of seems like you're just describing parody here.
posted by Kutsuwamushi at 4:50 PM on August 4, 2023 [2 favorites]

Pump up the volume, pump up the jam, and then put it in a...
posted by nikoniko at 5:12 PM on August 4, 2023

The world IS filled with wonders.
posted by inexorably_forward at 4:24 AM on August 5, 2023 [2 favorites]

Wait. An unnecessarily-long "club mix" that somehow ruins the essence of the original would actually be a perfect continuation of the joke.
posted by schmod at 8:09 PM on August 5, 2023 [1 favorite]

Wait, no, you have THREE of those useless remixes and ONE utterly brilliant one on a 12" single that costs as much as the full album would cost.

THAT would be the continuation of the joke.
posted by hippybear at 8:45 PM on August 5, 2023 [7 favorites]

So is the J in Biljana pronounced as an English /dj/ or a Continental /y/? I've been assuming for a Eurodance singer it's the latter, but I've not heard anyone actually say her name.
posted by Quasirandom at 7:25 AM on August 7, 2023

I kinda hate that the rich NY kids doing this are moving the sound from north-western Europe (plus italy) to the poorest regions, ex-yugoslavia and such.

Americans export their cultural sensitivities, but they don't seem to care the slightest about the sensitivities of other regions of the world.

I really wish I could enjoy this.

I'm actually a bit pissed that I can't.
posted by svenni at 8:30 AM on August 7, 2023 [1 favorite]

I agree, svenni, especially since his entire musical and sartorial style is yoinked from German techno of the 90s, and yet he situates his parody in the Balkan countries. It’s just kinda weird, honestly, like making up a fake band that sings and dresses like Lynyrd Skynyrd, but is supposed to be from Mexico City.
posted by Kattullus at 9:51 AM on August 7, 2023

So is the J in Biljana pronounced as an English /dj/ or a Continental /y/? I've been assuming for a Eurodance singer it's the latter, but I've not heard anyone actually say her name.

I have a good friend named Biljana, and she pronounces the J as a Y sound. (She's Macedonian/former Yugoslavian.)
posted by DirtyOldTown at 11:05 AM on August 7, 2023 [2 favorites]

I have to agree with lumensimus that the grammatical angle feels overplayed, and feels a bit ungenerous in what is otherwise as much a homage as a parody. It is certainly a bop, and I love the sleep version seanmpuckett has brought to the thread! I have also been mentally appending 'are my favourite guy' to things, for my own amusement, if not anyone else's.

One of the things I felt at the time (early 90's) was that this music reflected the time Lipps Inc were on European TV with a blonde woman lip syncing the lyrics* a decade earlier. This Eurodance is attempting to create music that was created by North American people of colour, but almost always lacking some of the essential ingredients. Sometimes it works, but it is always very, very white. Funkless funk, bassless bass, flowless rapping and soulless soul singing. Kind of cute, but also embarrassing, and and in retrospect giving strong white supremacist vibes, with or without the direct ties seen in Ace of Base. At the time, it made me feel a bit uncomfortable in a way I couldn't express without sounding like I was being a music snob about allegedly unashamedly 'fun' music.

The indie dance from the UK had a strong suit in taking solid breaks and putting some white people crooning on top of it, but at least they refrained from attempting to rap for the most part. Stone Roses - Fools Gold was all breaks, and Happy Mondays had excellent production and backing singers for Pills and Thrills. It always felt like they were standing on the shoulders of giants. Giants who were never afforded the luxury of a compliant media who fawned over them. Notwithstanding Soul II Soul, who were the exception rather than the rule.
When Rhythm is a Dancer came out, I felt that the paint-by-numbers structure and form was so evident and uninspiring that it must signal the end. Obviously, I was very wrong about that, and that song was an international hit, lasting over a month at the top spot of the UK charts, which was a relatively long time for that decade. Now, I mostly resent the pop music of my salad days for using up my limited neurons. I can remember whole chunks of unwanted ditties which will be triggered at by the shortest excerpt, while the songs I am trying to learn struggle to get a toe in the door.

*Funky Town is a stone cold jam.
posted by asok at 3:47 PM on August 7, 2023 [2 favorites]

Annnnnd we now have a THIRD Biljana Electronica.
posted by Quasirandom at 12:30 PM on August 8, 2023 [1 favorite]

The third Biljana came from the grassy knoll.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 2:26 PM on August 8, 2023 [1 favorite]

One of the things I felt at the time (early 90's) was that this music reflected the time Lipps Inc were on European TV with a blonde woman lip syncing the lyrics* a decade earlier.

There were like three videos made for Funky Town and it's the one with the duplicated blonde woman that was the hit video. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I'd like to think the situation today would be different.
posted by hippybear at 2:58 PM on August 8, 2023

We're about a month out from five Ms. Biljana Electronicas forming a supergroup, sweeping to the top of the dance-pop charts and accepting bids from interested Eurovision nations.
posted by delfin at 8:20 AM on August 9, 2023 [5 favorites]

“‘Planet Of The Bass’ And The Viral One Hit Wonder Conundrum,” Ryan Broderick, Garbage Day, 09 Aug 2023
posted by ob1quixote at 12:46 PM on August 9, 2023 [4 favorites]

Thanks for posting that article, ob1quixote. That provided a lot of context I needed for this. Also, interesting strategy reposting the song using different women. Definitely a mind that understand how TikTok works as a medium.
posted by hippybear at 12:25 PM on August 10, 2023

FULL SONG JUST DROPPED
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:04 AM on August 15, 2023 [4 favorites]

It's perfectly within its scope: totally forgettable lyrics only make you think When's the chorus getting here? Why aren't we in the chorus yet?
posted by Etrigan at 8:13 AM on August 15, 2023

FWIW, I think that, despite the title of the original TikTok, the poor English/grammatical gags are meant to reflect Eastern European DJ's of the 90's/00's more than the actual songs of the 90's.

Which is to say YES: they are doing a parody of that style/moment in time, but they're doing it specifically through the lens of the DJ Crazy Times character. And if you've been in an Eastern European club when the DJ begins to speak between songs, I think he's pretty hilariously dead-on. Those dudes so often have this weird overconfidence in their English fluency, their profundity, and their ability to create a catchphrase.
posted by DirtyOldTown at 8:25 AM on August 15, 2023 [1 favorite]