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WE MUST PROTECT THIS HOUES!!!!11!eleven
August 16, 2006 4:55 PM   Subscribe

Extremists are trying to kill our beloved Caps Lock! Mefites unite! CAPS LOCK DAY IS UNDER ATTACK! (via)
posted by spiderwire (74 comments total)

 
OH NOES!
posted by Sailor Martin at 4:58 PM on August 16, 2006 [1 favorite]


good
posted by jimmy at 5:00 PM on August 16, 2006


please kill "talk like a pirate day" while you're at it

thx
posted by jimmy at 5:00 PM on August 16, 2006


wgat
posted by boo_radley at 5:00 PM on August 16, 2006


THESE PEOPLE ARE BASTARDS.
posted by furiousthought at 5:09 PM on August 16, 2006


please kill "talk like a pirate day" while you're at it

are you lookin' to get keelhauled?^

i was gonna explain here what keelhauling is but then decided that this thread needs more meta...also wikipedia is the first google result for "keelhauling"
posted by spiderwire at 5:10 PM on August 16, 2006


I followed these instructions to disable caps lock in XP. BEST MOVE EVER>!@!@!
posted by null terminated at 5:11 PM on August 16, 2006 [1 favorite]


"I'll never grow up!" - Dee Snider
posted by mischief at 5:13 PM on August 16, 2006


How to change Caps Lock to Control in Linux console, X, Windows, and OS X: Because it's old-school, it's better for your hand, and you never use Caps Lock anyway.
posted by zerolucid at 5:15 PM on August 16, 2006


Why caps lock? Get rid of Scroll Lock, SysRq, and Break first you ninnies!
posted by blue_beetle at 5:16 PM on August 16, 2006


*blink*

I LIKE PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SAMMICHES!

*smile*
posted by ZachsMind at 5:17 PM on August 16, 2006


UNDER ATTACK? I CAN'T IMAGINE WHY!
posted by clevershark at 5:18 PM on August 16, 2006


TOKEN CAPITAL LETTERS IN REPLY TO POST.

EXCLAMATION MARK.
posted by Wataki at 5:19 PM on August 16, 2006


My keyboard has a key marked "Alt Gr".

I don't trust it.
posted by Jimbob at 5:21 PM on August 16, 2006 [1 favorite]


What will be the first move in the great War Against Caps-Lock? Firebombing AOL headquarters?
posted by clevershark at 5:21 PM on August 16, 2006


How to change Caps Lock to Control in Linux console, X, Windows, and OS X

You don't need a separate program in OSX 10.4; you can do this in the Keyboard & Mouse Preference Pane. Just choose the Keyboard tab, click the Modifier Keys button, and choose the desired action from the Caps Lock popup menu. I switched my Caps Lock and Control keys, which after the inevitable adjustment period works great.
posted by boaz at 5:21 PM on August 16, 2006


token lower case reply sans punctuation
posted by caddis at 5:21 PM on August 16, 2006


While we are at it:
Get rid of MSWord, all you need is vi.

Windows are evil, user interfaces should imitate Ratpoison.

Oh, and everyone should be using lisp.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 5:23 PM on August 16, 2006


Mock serious response about how these detached replies are becoming altogether too meta and causing confusion in new users.
posted by clevershark at 5:26 PM on August 16, 2006


LeT's CoMpRoMiSe
posted by Bighappyfunhouse at 5:28 PM on August 16, 2006


CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL, FOOLS.
posted by mullingitover at 5:29 PM on August 16, 2006


OK, here is my woe.

I have a UK keyboard and I'm running Windows XP.

WHEN I TYPE THE ¦ KEY IT MAKES |
WHEN I TYPE THE | KET IT MAKES ¦
WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK

SERIOUSLY
posted by riotgrrl69 at 5:31 PM on August 16, 2006


"I'll never grow up!" - Dee Snider

Many years ago, some postgrad friends of mine dropped some acid while on a road trip at a hotel, and one of them wandered off to get food and never came back. They were somewhat worried, but no one was exactly new to psychedelics, so they let it lie. Sure enough, they found him the next day in his room, asleep in bed, and asked what the hell had happened.

He replied, "I dropped acid and played basketball with Dee Snider." Everyone cracked up, and figured that he must have had a good trip.

He then proceeded to explain that what had happened is that he'd gone down to the hotel bar to have a drink, and sat down next to some guy who looked almost exactly like Dee Snider. The friend remarked, "man, you look almost exactly like Dee Snider."

To which the guy explained that he, in fact, was Dee Snider from Twisted Sister, and produced his driver's license to prove it. After some chatting, the friend offered Dee some of his stash, and consequently they spent a few hours hanging out tripping, most of which were spent playing Nerf basketball in their hotel room. Eventually, Dee left, and the friend came down and went to sleep.

There is no moral to this story. But I think of it whenever I hear anyone mention Dee Snider.
posted by spiderwire at 5:32 PM on August 16, 2006 [5 favorites]


1: Come up with some dumb-as-shit and trivial suggestion, such as "eliminate the caps-lock key."
2: Make a blog and discussion group.
3: Get your blog and group mentioned on reddit, slashdot and mefi.
4: ????
5: Profit.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 5:39 PM on August 16, 2006


IN SOVIET UNION CAPS LOCK YOU!
posted by oxford blue at 5:40 PM on August 16, 2006


YOUR LIFE IS TIRED AND JADED
BORING AND CONFISCATED
IF THAT'S YOUR BEST, YOUR BEST WON'T DO



posted by freebird at 5:42 PM on August 16, 2006


I rEpRoGrAmMeD mY aLt KeY tO rEaLlY mAkE tHiNgS aLt & sO tHaT i CoUlD mIx ThInGs Up _ tRy It YoUrSeLf _ iT rOcKs!1!1!

hErE'S mY pLaN iF wE lOsE cApSlOcK dAy _ wE cAn StArT aLt DaY1!1!
posted by madamjujujive at 5:56 PM on August 16, 2006


My keyboard has a key marked "Alt Gr".

Astro Zombie 3 can help you with that.
posted by hangashore at 6:05 PM on August 16, 2006


if with a regular keyboard on a (insert whatever)nix machine, use:

#!/bin/sh
xmodmap -e "clear lock"
xmodmap -e "keycode 66 = Return"

or (if you're on a sun type 7 keyboard like I am, use this):


#!/bin/sh
xmodmap -e "clear lock"
xmodmap -e "keycode 37 = Return"
xmodmap -e "keycode 66 = Control_L"
xmodmap -e "add Control = Control_L"
posted by oonh at 6:07 PM on August 16, 2006


LEFTIST MEDIA CONSPIRACY IS DECLARING AN ASSAULT ON CAPS LOCK DAY

ALL THIS REMAPPING KEYBOARDS CRAP AND SHIFT KEY PROPAGANDA IS A SECULAR COVER
posted by spiderwire at 6:12 PM on August 16, 2006


CAP EXIST GAS PIPE AT RISER AND RELOC RANGE

Architects use their caps lock quite a bit actually.
posted by yeti at 6:22 PM on August 16, 2006


Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
posted by liquorice at 6:23 PM on August 16, 2006


is jack saturn behind this?
posted by shoepal at 6:26 PM on August 16, 2006


WHEN I TYPE THE ¦ KEY IT MAKES |
WHEN I TYPE THE | KET IT MAKES ¦
WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK

SERIOUSLY

THE FUCK I CAN ONLY MAKE ||||||||||||||||||||||||| EVEN THO THE KEY I HAVE HAS ¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦
I HAD TO COPY AND PASTE THAT ¦¦¦ TO MAKE IT COME
posted by TheOnlyCoolTim at 6:26 PM on August 16, 2006


YOU USE CTRL-ALT-| TO MAKE ¦ OBVIOUSLY
IT'S LIKE €
posted by riotgrrl69 at 6:32 PM on August 16, 2006


Just flip the damn capslock keycap out with a screwdriver.
Do it to those wierdball windows keys too.

It makes it lots easier to shake the crumbs & hairs out of the keyboard.

Maybe you can sell the keycaps on ebay. As jewelry or something.
posted by hexatron at 6:32 PM on August 16, 2006


EXCEPT
posted by riotgrrl69 at 6:32 PM on August 16, 2006


EVIL
posted by riotgrrl69 at 6:32 PM on August 16, 2006


Finally, the salmon and toast tags get their due.
posted by emelenjr at 6:39 PM on August 16, 2006


SPEAK UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU
posted by brain_drain at 6:41 PM on August 16, 2006


ACCCCHHHH NOOOOOOOO
posted by killdevil at 6:45 PM on August 16, 2006


Finally, the salmon and toast tags get their due.

If I had a sockpuppet, I would use it to say that this is a horrible FPP and point everyone to crunchland's profile, which has an excellent writeup of how to write FPPs, and, ironically, a list of sockpuppets. (Ironic in the Alanis kind of way.)

Since I don't, I will say I'm glad that someone noticed the tags, and also that I had a lot of caffeine today and felt like injecting some levity. Which might explain the Dee Snider stuff. His website has a latin phrase on the front page.




I MEAN THANKS YOU
posted by spiderwire at 6:47 PM on August 16, 2006


ALSO IF YOU INJECT LEVITY USE A CLEAN NEEDLE

at vassar they have a non sequitur society, whose motto is "we don't make sense, but we do like pizza."

matt is gonna kill me

posted by spiderwire at 6:50 PM on August 16, 2006


Some people really hate the Caps Lock key, at least since 1989:

"I don't know why it hasn't made it to alt.peeves yet, but one of my most cherished and encouraged pet-peeves is the existence of such a useless, stupid, nasty, treacherous and evil menace to the progress of humankind is the CAPS LOCK KEY.

In my estimation, the only sensible place for a Caps Lock key would be in a fairly deeply recessed hole in the back of the monitor, or, preferably, in another room altogether."
[continued]


The solution that's implemented for the Colemak keyboard layout is to map Caps Lock to Backspace. This change alone saves about 15%-20% of total finger movement.
posted by Sharcho at 6:53 PM on August 16, 2006


Sharcho! alt.peeves is awesome! too bad it's so hard to read with google's crappy groups interface. i already hate pitbulls.

clearly this demonstrates the need for MaliceFilter.


also, that's an interesting keyboard layout. i hadn't thought much about the remapping of the function keys like backspace, but it's an interesting question since theoretically your use of it should decrease as you become a better typist. :)

this is the capewell layout, which is supposedly faster than dvorak. and, eminently germane to this thread, here's a web-based method of making custom OSX keyboard layouts.
posted by spiderwire at 7:05 PM on August 16, 2006


Stupid lamers.

All they have to do is go buy a Happy Hacking Keyboard, then they can be rid of their pussy dedicated arrow keys, function keys and a bunch of other crap, sparing them the temptation of non-l33t keys and allowing the rest of us an easy way to continue to get honked off with n00bs who insist on gluing their capslocks down and partying like it's Black September all year 'round.
posted by mph at 7:12 PM on August 16, 2006



posted by ericb at 7:19 PM on August 16, 2006


I HAVE NOTHING TO ADD SO I AM SHOUTING VERY QUIETLY.
posted by arto at 7:32 PM on August 16, 2006


die, caps lock. die. die. die.
posted by bshort at 7:32 PM on August 16, 2006


IS THIS THE CAPS DAY REHEARSAL?
posted by TwelveTwo at 8:04 PM on August 16, 2006


forget caps lock, i want to get rid of the shift key too.
posted by joeblough at 8:06 PM on August 16, 2006


IS THIS THE CAPS DAY REHEARSAL?

THE HOLIDAYS COEM EARLIER EVERY YEAR
posted by spiderwire at 8:09 PM on August 16, 2006


Caps-Lock-Day, like Talk-Like-A-Pirate-Day and Lent, is just another made up Hallmark holiday.
posted by Slack-a-gogo at 8:26 PM on August 16, 2006


CAPS-LOCK-DAY CARDS SHOULD BE DISCONTINUED TO CONSERVE INK.
posted by TwelveTwo at 8:33 PM on August 16, 2006


Ok, so my original thought was, "Wait... what will happen to the FPS games where I use the Caps Lock key?" Then I realized that any critical action that is mapped to the Caps Lock key I'm going to re-map to the Shift key anyway (just like I always re-map the Enter key for "Use" to the space bar and Mouse Button 2 to "Jump." I have no idea what game ingrained that sequence in my brain, BTW.)

so, yeah. fuck caps lock.
posted by Cyrano at 8:33 PM on August 16, 2006


As a screenwriter, I use my caps lock key regularly. It is odd, however, that the writing on the caps lock key is all lowercase. What I don't understand on many PC keyboards is why the light for caps lock is on the opposite side of the keyboard.
posted by strangeleftydoublethink at 8:46 PM on August 16, 2006


I SAY WE GENOCIDE THEM WITH OUR SCIENCE PENIS.
posted by Football Bat at 8:55 PM on August 16, 2006


Wait, am I the only one who uses the capslock key to type things like FBI, ASCII or CIA?

No, seriously. When typing the previous sentence, I hit the capslock, typed FBI, hit capslock, typed the comma, then hit the capslock again, typed ASCII, hit capslock, etc... and did it again in this small-small postscript? Perhaps my youth as a typesetter was in fact wasted.

God why don't keyboards include word-delete anymore?

posted by bigbigdog at 9:05 PM on August 16, 2006


I suppose that no one of the software developer bent uses an all-caps naming convention for constants anymore? Because typing things like MAX_NUM_ITERATIONS without the caps lock key is, well, irritating.

I saw this topic posted on Slashdot earlier, and about the only person I could agree with is the one who said that it's not about the key, but where it lives. I could see that. I'd just as soon move it out of the way somewhere, and replace it with the History Eraser Button^.
posted by Brak at 9:50 PM on August 16, 2006


I really wish there was a "LET'S USE HTML MARKUP AS IT'S INTENDED WITH ANCHOR'S AND HREF'S TO AVOID THE SILLY CARET LINKS TO WIKIPEDIA" key.

That would be mighty handy.
posted by purephase at 11:20 PM on August 16, 2006


Oh, and for MeFi's sake.. we could make it's symbol a kitten.
posted by purephase at 11:21 PM on August 16, 2006


All your base are belong to us.
It's peanut butter jelly time.

Dunno. That lacks.

And caps lock does not work on this bilingual keyboard for some reason, and MAN, DOES MY LITTLE FINGER HURT.
posted by dreamsign at 12:20 AM on August 17, 2006


CAPS LOCKS KEY DYING?
WORTH A FRONT PAGE POST ON META?
STILL BEST THREAD THIS WEEK.
posted by MiltonRandKalman at 1:33 AM on August 17, 2006


fuck caps lock. you can still have your caps lock day without it. And I feel deeply honored purephase.

I can imagine many useful buttons, even some useful locks, but caps lock isn't one. Keyboards need little LCD screens one each key so you can reprogram them instantly.
posted by jeffburdges at 5:11 AM on August 17, 2006


My keyboard doesn't have a caplock key. I ripped the SOB out one day after a 12 hour tequila binge.

I kept it though, and I carefully and ceremoniously put it back into the keyboard for CAPS LOCK DAY.

The day after, it comes out.

I work on too many computers to learn a swap, which is why I haven't modmapped it to CTRL, though, since I live by vi, the idea of modmapping it to escape has come to mind, esp. on the Powerbook, who's keyboard was obviously laid out by some emacs whore.

I want all keyboard to IBM Model M layout, with the exception of swapping ctrl and capslock.

Having SysRq shutdown the system would be cool.
posted by eriko at 5:34 AM on August 17, 2006


I might be new to this whole thing but. . . why don't you just not use it? I hardly ever use delete and insert, but there they starring at me in wait until I'm ready.

I just don't understand the anti-CAPS lock sentiment.
posted by Lord Chancellor at 5:51 AM on August 17, 2006



posted by elmwood at 6:42 AM on August 17, 2006


fuck caps lock.

YOUR AN ANTICAPSITE
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 7:17 AM on August 17, 2006


You can enable Windows to beep whenever you press the Caps Lock, Num Lock, and Scroll Lock:

Start > Control Panel > Accessibility Options > Keyboard > ToggleKeys, and check the "Use ToggleKeys" box.

Slightly safer and easier than adding items to your registry.
posted by Lord Kinbote at 7:29 AM on August 17, 2006


I might be new to this whole thing but. . . why don't you just not use it? I hardly ever use delete and insert, but there they starring at me in wait until I'm ready.

I just don't understand the anti-CAPS lock sentiment.
posted by Lord Chancellor at 5:51 AM PST on August 17 [+] [!]


The primary reason I dislike it is that I use the vi text editor. It has a command mode in which the alphanumeric characters perform diferent commands rather than enter text for that character. For example, typing escape to enter command mode and then dd deletes the current line. If you accidently hit the caps lock, you wind up typing DD, which deletes to the end of the line, twice.

What this means, is that accidently hitting caps lock and then spewing a rapid string of commands has the effect of randomly executing editing commands in whatever you were working on. It tends to make a pretty big mess.

I suspect this is where most of the sentiment against the caps lock key comes from. That said, only freaks like me use vi any more.:wq
posted by Bugg at 9:03 AM on August 17, 2006


Well on the other hand, there are quite a few data entry tasks where caps-lock is used often enough to justify it's position on the home row. Which is why these movements are kind of silly. They always depend on extrapolating from one person's personal preferences to a universal claim about user needs.
posted by KirkJobSluder at 9:38 AM on August 17, 2006


STOP TRYING TO WHITEWASH THE HORROR KIRK
posted by spiderwire at 12:37 PM on August 17, 2006


SAVE THE LOCH CAPS MONSTER !
posted by sgt.serenity at 2:30 PM on August 17, 2006


WHOA. I LOOKED DOWN AT MY KEYBOARD AND CAPSLOCK WAS MAGICALLY ON! I never turn it on, except that time just now.
posted by Clamwacker at 8:00 PM on August 17, 2006


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