MetaFilter

Also, you can't think of ANYTHING he can do for you for ninety minutes a week?

That's not really how sex is supposed to work.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by thejoshu at 12:07 PM on August 23, 2010

The New York Times loves certain educational themes:

it's impossible to get into good kindergartens--it's too competitive, too costly, requires too many tutors!

Kids today are useless--either they're lazy, afraid to strike out on their own, or the parents won't turn them loose!

They do these stories about three times a year.
posted to MetaFilter by etaoin at 4:26 AM on August 23, 2010

Patterson considers himself as an entertainer, not a man of letters. Still, he bristles when he hears one of his books described as a guilty pleasure: “Why should anyone feel guilty about reading a book?”

I think that's the most refreshing line in the whole thing.
posted to MetaFilter by phunniemee at 9:51 PM on August 22, 2010

Or is that just steaming video?

It's steaming, alright.
posted to MetaFilter by Blazecock Pileon at 12:18 PM on August 18, 2010

The web is not in decline even according to that graph. I'm confident that 23% of today's bandwidth is greater than 55% of 2000's bandwidth.
posted to MetaFilter by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 12:13 PM on August 18, 2010

What kind of maniac lays out two single-column articles side by side on a web page?
posted to MetaFilter by Faint of Butt at 12:04 PM on August 18, 2010

A Day In The Life

I checked the queue today oh boy...
posted to MetaTalk by The Whelk at 8:50 AM on August 22, 2010

Also, it was your post. I don't know why you got so passive voice all of the sudden.
posted to MetaTalk by jessamyn at 8:01 AM on November 16, 2007

I'm going to go ahead and close this up, then.
posted to MetaTalk by Devils Rancher at 9:47 PM on August 21, 2010

Wired wants the web to be dead so that their for-profit app will be successful. If the world bends in favour of paywalls and apps, that would suck for the average web user but would presumably support the business model of traditional media.

I was really shocked to hear that the web was dead, given how many really awesome web tools there are out there, what with the vastly improved Google docs, gmail and calendar in particular. The cloud is increasingly the better choice... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Hildegarde at 11:40 AM on August 21, 2010

you gotta give more information than that. What city are you going to be in? What do you like to do? When you think back to great birthdays, what sticks out in your mind, either for you, or for other people.

Without any other information, go out to dinner and a movie, or a play.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by TheBones at 7:32 PM on August 22, 2010

Essentially you've asked for everything an iPod is but not at iPod prices? If you use Macs exclusively, it would seem that you are not averse to paying a premium for computing. You bought an iPod in the past... I say just get an iPod. Why complicate the matter? Besides, Apple are notorious for updating iTunes just to break compatibility with some device which may compete with the iPod.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Biru at 3:46 PM on August 22, 2010

Wow
posted to Ask MetaFilter by vitabellosi at 12:25 AM on August 18, 2010

A lot of guys (women may do this just as often, I'm a guy so I'm speaking from my own experience here) will feel trapped in particular kinds of arguments/conversations, and do something stupid in order to get out of the situation. Different people have different unfortunate automatic responses. I, for example, will sometimes feel trapped in an argument and just say what I think the other person wants to hear in order to end the argument. That's a terrible habit. A friend of mine says something... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Ragged Richard at 5:53 PM on August 22, 2010

Why don't you just watch the baby so the husband can go? I would rather watch a baby than go to the wedding of a stranger. In fact, I would rather watch a baby than go to the wedding of most people I know. You don't like these people, why are you going to get dragged into going to their wedding? I vote don't go.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by elpea at 8:32 AM on August 21, 2010

Go digital: since you're learning photography, you will want to iterate quickly: take a shot with combination of shutter speed, aperture, iso, etc., and see the results right after you do it. You learn a lot less quickly if you take the shot, send it to the lab to develop, forget what the light conditions, settings, etc. You also take a lot fewer shots, since the marginal cost of each additional photo is around $0.30 for film, and basically zero for digital. If you're learning, you want to... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by chengjih at 5:22 AM on August 22, 2010

Despite our post-evolutionary attempts to legislate its desirability away in order to quench the raging fire of guilt over our own prurient interest, youth remains a strongly attractive force.
posted to MetaFilter by umberto at 6:43 PM on May 13, 2010

Uh, kind of disappointing that half the comments in this thread are all BOYS ALWAYS WANT SEX SO IF THATS RAPE SIGN ME UP LOL AMIRITE
posted to MetaFilter by threeants at 8:29 PM on May 13, 2010

Uh, kind of disappointing that half the comments in this thread are all BOYS ALWAYS WANT SEX SO IF THATS RAPE SIGN ME UP LOL AMIRITE

It's almost impossible to find support in dealing with issues like these if you are the boy involved. For a young man in a sexual relationship with an older woman, people either say "no way" or "you lucky dog." The nymag article is mostly fluff, but it does sum up the cultural zeitgeist pretty... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by peeedro at 9:27 PM on May 13, 2010

Well, I'm married to Darlingbri so it pains me to say that I think you're both flat-out wrong about whether it's a good idea to say "BBQ!!" to everybody and make the 'Veggie' bit a secret.

You absolutely should do whatever the hell you like at your own event.

But not telling people in advance about your restrictions is squarely in jerky bait-and-switch territory, IMHO, the kind of thing that leads to veggies being stereotyped as...... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by genghis at 8:14 PM on May 29, 2010

What if you just called it a "party" instead of calling it a "barbecue"? That way people wouldn't have to deal with whatever expectations they have.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by amtho at 7:55 PM on May 29, 2010

I would say definitely mention that it's no-meat-- not because holding a vegetarian cookout is a venal sin that everyone should whip you for, but because the responses to this thread make it abundantly clear that a lot of people are incredibly, childishly picky.

Seriously, it almost makes me sad that there are people who apparently can't go one meatless meal without passing out or needing smelling salts or something. I don't usually go too long without eating starches,... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by threeants at 9:46 PM on May 29, 2010

Here's a little experiment you can do. The next time you get a head of lettuce, wash it in a bowl of water.

Remove the lettuce (leaving the water in the bowl), dry the lettuce, and eat it.

Now look at the water you left in the bowl. Ask yourself, "Would I drink that water?" I tend to say no.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by IvyMike at 1:20 AM on August 22, 2010

i am not sure those two questions have been answered. but this thread has made me sit back and significantly think about my position.

I'm not sure if I understand your position at all. Do you want no legal rights for any sort of partnership? Do you want full marriage rights for any group of people? Do you want everything offered piecemeal, so you could have Ray appointed to make decisions about your medical care, but to be able to adopt a child with... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by fermezporte at 9:31 PM on August 21, 2010

Take your own advice.
posted by liketitanic at 12:02 AM on August 22 [+] [!]

I can't the flag doesn't exist yet.
posted to MetaTalk by darkmatter at 9:04 PM on August 21, 2010

ROU_Xenophobe, is a DGS the director of graduate studies?

If so, I agree with ROU_Xenophobe. Look over the application for each program to see how they're asking for the information, and if you are still not clear, contact the program to find out what they want.

In the case of my program, we'd like to see the GPA from each school, and will have your transcripts to check as well, but we are mainly interested in the GPA from your degree-granting... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Squeak Attack at 10:42 AM on August 21, 2010

as someone who is queer, i did not sign on to having the same things as you.

Not only has it demanded the biggest piece of the pie, it continually delegitimatizes the struggles that have connected to queer liberation.

marriage, while viewed as a civil rights issue, is part of a conservative instinct to assimilate a long standing queer culture, and used as a distraction to avoid discussing issues that people find distasteful.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by foxy_hedgehog at 12:53 PM on August 21, 2010

Yeah, I think that is where you depart from a good portion, possibly the majority, of the population. Not that fucking isn't great, but most people seem to be looking for love. And certainly there are plenty of love relationships where fucking has receded but the love continues to hold the relationship strong.

But knowing that about your worldview does help me understand where you're coming from with what you've been writing in this thread.
posted to MetaFilter by hippybear at 11:43 AM on August 21, 2010

Well can they just shut up for a while so that those of us that would like it can at least make the choice.
posted to MetaFilter by Long Way To Go at 4:17 PM on August 20, 2010

Don't negotiate with (emotional) terrorists.

That feeling? Of being compelled to do things that are harmful to you, because someone else demands it? That is something you choose to feel. You can stop your participation in this at any time. It's really that simple. Best of luck.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by danny the boy at 6:54 PM on August 20, 2010

What kind of job is this they're applying for?

The fact that my folks aren't customer-facing might make my situation a little different, but I can't imagine gathering one useful fact about a potential hire from the internet. Anything to do with their skillset should be covered by the time you've confirmed the resume, checked refs and certifications. The candidate's personality, people-skills, judgment...those are pretty subjective, and you're going to end up surprised... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by mittens at 6:32 PM on August 20, 2010

It really does sound like it was a stupid (and mean and inconsiderate) comment made in the heat of the moment. Ask a similar question "would you prefer it if your boyfriend was exactly who he is now, in all ways, but just slightly taller / more hair / less excema / more toned / looked more like Brad Pitt?" and the answer would probably be yes. Which doesn't mean that you don't love him completely! And it sounds like the same is true in reverse. His subsequent comments are actually... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by finding.perdita at 6:01 PM on August 20, 2010

I believe you're hot. That's not what is important. What's important is the lack of self-knowledge and self control you displayed by baiting him that way, ie, I know you don't like my body and wish I were different. You're voicing your fears/feelings rather than your knowledge about what he's actually thinking, unless you read his diary.

A better approach would be, "Hey, I'm feeling crappy and weird. Now pet my head and tell me I'm pretty." Although that's... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Issithe at 5:46 PM on August 20, 2010

Two thoughts. One, if there were no costs other than plane ticket to visit, I would say go through with it, but you and your husband come up with some secret sign to give each other to let each other know this is so painful and as an inside joke between you two. Sort of like you cross your fingers so it doesn't count.

On the other hand, If I were your husband, I would offer (insist?) to be the "bad guy" here. Take whatever heat given but be the reason why... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by JohnnyGunn at 5:48 PM on August 20, 2010

Speaking of "movement," isn't asking the guy out going against the "He's Just Not That In To You" rule?

Rules are for people who don't dare do things.

Don't be one of those.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by IAmBroom at 10:20 AM on August 20, 2010

I co-wrote a blog for a year called Frugal Culture, where I stressed over and over that frugality wasn't not spending money, but paying attention to whether your spending is serving your values and goals.

I'm not looking but if I were, anyone ruling me out for describing myself as frugal would be doing us both a favor.
posted to MetaFilter by Zed at 3:02 PM on August 20, 2010

The mods are not in the habit of encoding passive-aggressive sullenness into the site's mechanisms and templates.

Yeah, might be worth mentioning that everyone is presumed to be a special snowflake, thus no extra snowflake assertion is required.
posted to MetaTalk by jessamyn at 12:27 PM on August 20, 2010

The mods are not in the habit of encoding passive-aggressive sullenness into the site's mechanisms and templates.

Now is a fantastic time to start!
posted to MetaTalk by shakespeherian at 12:27 PM on August 20, 2010

By the way, stay as far from time-travel movies as you can. In my experience, they are the worst offenders. It's gotten that just the mention of time travel sets off warning bells in my mind.

The ones that drive me the most crazy are the ones that acknowledge (but don't REALLY acknowledge) the Butterfly Effect. People go back in time, open all kinds of doors that weren't opened, say things to people that weren't said, etc. And yet worry that "We can't kill Hitler,... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by grumblebee at 11:10 AM on August 20, 2010

<1% Addicts

What else do I have to do?
posted to MetaFilter by yeti at 8:01 AM on August 20, 2010

Oh dear, wrong place! Now I am dreadfully embarrassed. I only came because I thought it said effluvient audience.

*drips away, leaving only stenches and stains behind*
posted to MetaFilter by adipocere at 8:00 AM on August 20, 2010

cortex, you have officially renewed my faith in humanity. I thank you.
posted to MetaTalk by monju_bosatsu at 8:01 PM on March 28, 2006

There's a jangly, wistful guitarpop song somewhere in the phrase 'mathewchen is spamming'....
posted to MetaTalk by stavrosthewonderchicken at 4:27 PM on March 28, 2006

It would make my day. And I think it sucks that it's 2010 and women don't feel completely free to ask men out.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Calloused_Foot at 5:47 AM on August 20, 2010

Guys out there...need advice mostly from you...how do you take being asked out by a cute, bubbly, intelligent, financially independent girl?

Oh jesus god yes please hi now thanks wow hey.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by threeants at 12:03 AM on August 20, 2010

most marriage problems are 50-50 split or close to it. two times in 7 years he was loud to you! get over yourself and go to counselling. you probably need it more than he does. get over yourself. it's not all about you.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by swmobill at 7:16 PM on August 19, 2010

Thanks all for the suggestions thus far--you've given us a lot to think about.

Jaltcoh your response is completely eerie: Zuzu has been the only name we've vaguely considered since the positive pregnancy test, precisely for Zuzu's petals. Shocking that anyone would think of it.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by rabidsegue at 7:48 PM on August 19, 2010

No. Acting on your sexual desire is a choice. Beyond that it is not a choice. You cannot decide who you will be attracted you. Oh sure, you can force yourself to get wet/get it up for someone, you can find something about a given person to be aroused by, but it is not a conscious decision.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by dirtynumbangelboy at 9:08 AM on June 17, 2010

And I'm frankly amazed at how often our "lizard brains" are trotted out in these conversations, usually by men and usually in a way that seeks to justify objectifying or demeaning behavior, on a site that generally has such a high level of discussion.

Are you including me in the list of people you're criticizing, because I'm the person who most recently mentioned lizard brains before your post. I also said, twice, and once in bold, that... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by grumblebee at 8:46 AM on August 19, 2010

should I share them? How much should I soften them, if their strength is actually an important part of the answer?

You should soften them enough so that people who hear them are likely to take it to heart and listen to them. I am in no way saying that people should not have strong emotions or that those emotions are not valid. That said, people need to use good judgement and discretion when explaining those emotions to someone else to help them solve... [more]
posted to MetaTalk by jessamyn at 8:40 AM on August 19, 2010