Enough flags, Betsy. I want a tank.

November 12, 2014 8:43 PM

The captioned adventures of George Washington, episode 1: In which General Washington becomes increasingly done with Betsy Ross showing him flags. Further episodes below the fold.

The captioned adventures of George Washington continue.
Yet another installment of the Captioned Adventures of George Washington.
The Captioned Family!Adventures of George Washington.
Even more captioned adventures of George Washington.
More this-is-getting-out-of-hand Captioned Adventures of George Washington
The Never-Ending Captioned Adventures of George Washington
Some more of those Captioned Adventures of George Washington things.
The Wacky Captioned Adventures of George Washington
The thrilling Captioned Adventures of George Washington.
The Etc. Captioned Adventures of George Washington
The Frustrated Captioned Adventures of George Washington
Another helping of the Captioned Adventures of George Washington
The Still Continuing Captioned Adventures of George Washington
The Fun-Filled Captioned Adventures of George Washington
The Sarcastic Captioned Adventures of George Washington
The Return of the Captioned Adventures of George Washington
The Halloween Adventures of George Washington

posted by Lexica (17 comments total)

I am tired and recovering from being nebulously ill and this is exactly what I wanted for tonight and I guess what I'm trying to say is bless you and may your children and/or cats and/or charming collectibles multiply fruitfully.
posted by WidgetAlley at 8:48 PM on November 12, 2014 [4 favorites]

"Dammit Betsy, this is not an acceptable Halloween costume".
-from The Thrilling adventures.
posted by clavdivs at 8:59 PM on November 12, 2014 [2 favorites]

"and screw u in particular, my good sir"
posted by ourt at 9:33 PM on November 12, 2014

asscravats!
posted by Slap*Happy at 10:12 PM on November 12, 2014 [4 favorites]

can we please start referring to mefi as the "diddly damn blue"
posted by en forme de poire at 10:30 PM on November 12, 2014 [3 favorites]

on a horse made of crystal he patrolled the land
with a mason ring and schnauzer in his perfect hands
posted by koeselitz at 10:53 PM on November 12, 2014 [12 favorites]

I just finished a project that involved looking at a lot of founding fathers, and this is exactly what I needed. Now to send it to the team...
posted by buriednexttoyou at 3:12 AM on November 13, 2014

"Here use my damn finder"
posted by Omnomnom at 4:25 AM on November 13, 2014 [2 favorites]

British mefites are advised to only read this in the bathroom, as nothing makes an Englishman shit faster than .... you know the rest.

I particularly like the one where he fails to take the kids to soccer. And internal river dancing.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 5:11 AM on November 13, 2014

I didn't think I'd find anything more hilarious than Drunk J. Crew - or, more accurately, I didn't think I'd find anything so soon - yet here we are. You're a true American hero, George.

*riverdances internally*
posted by Metroid Baby at 5:22 AM on November 13, 2014

Ugh! I've been there.
posted by NoMich at 5:28 AM on November 13, 2014

Stan Freberg did it first!
posted by magstheaxe at 5:39 AM on November 13, 2014 [2 favorites]

The GW pick up lines (from the fun-filled link) are hilarious.
posted by Omnomnom at 6:17 AM on November 13, 2014

Came here to mention Stan Freberg, @magstheaxe!

Nicely done. :-]

"Hey! You're tracking snow all over my early American rug!"
posted by zuhl at 9:51 AM on November 13, 2014

"respect the washingbubble" my favorite.

British mefites are advised to only read this in the bathroom, as nothing makes an Englishman shit faster than .... you know the rest.

Meh. As an Englishman living in the US: you lot really over-estimate how miffed we still are about Independence. Pretty much over it now. It's our various European neighbors that we still hold grudges against.
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 12:04 PM on November 13, 2014

Also, it seems to me that there's great scope for the combined Captioned Adventures of Horatio Nelson and Napoleon Bonaparte. (This one, for example, which is basically Hell Yes I'm Emperor, Admire My Heroic Package.)
posted by We had a deal, Kyle at 12:11 PM on November 13, 2014

We had a deal, Kyle: "As an Englishman living in the US: you lot really over-estimate how miffed we still are about Independence. "

Hey, when I get a chance to make a 200-year-old joke, imma make a 200-year-old joke!
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 6:33 PM on November 13, 2014 [1 favorite]