20 Years of The Rock
November 18, 2016 10:24 AM   Subscribe

Twenty years ago this week, the Rock burst forth onto the nation's television screens in his first wrestling match, and nothing would ever be the same.

Well, no. That's a lie. It's actually a couple of lies. First, Dwayne Johnson wasn't "The Rock" yet -- he took that name months later as part of his transition to a bad guy (and starting a five-year span of referring to himself only in the third person). Johnson initially wrestled in the then-WWF as "Rocky Maivia", after his father (Rocky Johnson) and his mother's father ("High Chief" Peter Maivia). The fans hated his aw-shucks babyface character to the point that he was greeted with "DIE ROCKY DIE" chants, necessitating the heel turn and name change.

Second, it wasn't really his first match. Johnson had "warmed up" in the Memphis territory with legend Jerry "The King" Lawler as Flex Kavana.

But that's professional wrestling, where the truth can change even faster than the Rock can raise the People's Eyebrow. In the slightly more real world of Hollywood, Johnson has become one of the biggest stars in the world, injecting new life into multiple franchises, particularly the Fast & Furious movies.

Johnson has, of course, branched out into other realms, with a partnership with Under Armour to design clothes and workout gear, a Rock Clock alarm app, and telling Vanity Fair that he might just run for President in 2020 (he is a registered Republican but has jealously guarded against at least one Republican using his image in a campaign commercial).

And of course, he is the Sexiest Man Alive.
posted by Etrigan (70 comments total) 22 users marked this as a favorite
 
I was always more of a Mick 'Mankind' Foley guy.
posted by jonmc at 10:31 AM on November 18, 2016 [4 favorites]


telling Vanity Fair that he might just run for President in 2020 [...] he is a registered Republican

No joke, if Dwayne Johnson attempted to primary Trump in 2020, I might be compelled to switch party affiliations.
posted by Strange Interlude at 10:41 AM on November 18, 2016 [18 favorites]


I'm actually looking forward to seeing how he does with the upcoming Moana. (I'm actually looking forward to a lot of things about Moana, to be honest.) Lin-Manuel Miranda did a lot of the music for it, and has said that he prepped for it by watching old videos of Dwayne where he used to do little improvised songs before matches where he trash-talked his opponents, and Lin was apparently watching them and making notes like "okay, so his upper range is about here, and...."

As they would say, You're welcome.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 10:41 AM on November 18, 2016 [8 favorites]


Say what you want about the man, he is hugely electrifying.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 10:45 AM on November 18, 2016 [4 favorites]


Hot dogs. He is cooking hot dogs.
posted by Sys Rq at 10:46 AM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


That was amazing. That was around Attitude Era, the time I started watching "wrasslin" -- I absolutely loved it then.

Going home to hunt down all my Attitude Era wrestling shirts!
posted by Ms. Moonlight at 10:51 AM on November 18, 2016


Say what you want about the man, he is hugely electrifying.

One might even call him the most electrifying man in sports entertainment history!
posted by explosion at 10:55 AM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


It is largely because of Dwayne The Rock Johnson that I am looking forward to Moana despite the fact that the trailer has Baby Moana holding what are pretty obviously Florida Fighting Conch shells. (Full disclosure: not a marine biologist nor a shell collector. I live in Pennsylvania.)
posted by which_chick at 10:55 AM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


injecting new life into multiple franchises, particularly the Fast & Furious movies

Blasphemy! Team Diesel forever!
posted by Beholder at 10:55 AM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


Blasphemy! Team Diesel forever!

Honestly, in a Rock vs. Kevin Nash match I don't see how you can really go with the latter. smh
posted by splen at 10:58 AM on November 18, 2016 [7 favorites]


The Rock is amazing, and a welcome replacement for the now-disgraced Hulk Hogan as my favorite wrestler-turned-actor. Though I still love Suburban Commando.
posted by grumpybear69 at 10:59 AM on November 18, 2016 [2 favorites]


I maintain that The Rundown is hugely underrated.

Okay, maybe not hugely. But it was surprisingly watchable and Dwayne Johnson has great comic chops that I wish were used more.
posted by ODiV at 11:02 AM on November 18, 2016 [11 favorites]




Yeah, finding out that Vin Diesel was a D&D nerd changed my reality.
That and his baffling affection for Riddick.
posted by Damienmce at 11:06 AM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


injecting new life into multiple franchises, particularly the Fast & Furious movies

Blasphemy! Team Diesel forever!


Ugh I just hate that they are not friends because it ruins my daydreams about them Christmas caroling together in bicep-hugging t-shirts and Santa hats.
posted by Mrs. Pterodactyl at 11:07 AM on November 18, 2016 [8 favorites]


hehe, for awhile now my answer to the old question "If you could host a dinner party with 3 people, alive or dead, who would it be?" has been Stanley Kubrick, Stephen King, and The Rock to referee.
posted by mannequito at 11:07 AM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


Yeah, finding out that Vin Diesel was a D&D nerd changed my reality.

In the unending Jock/Nerd wars, Vin Diesel is the Daywalker.
posted by Strange Interlude at 11:10 AM on November 18, 2016 [12 favorites]


Here's The Rock on Splash Mountain.

I feel so bad for the unidentifiable person in the fourth seat.
posted by Strange Interlude at 11:13 AM on November 18, 2016


I don't believe in the concept of "the guilty pleasure", if you enjoy something why feel guilt?

I've had to redefine my stance to allow me to continue watching "Ballers" on HBO. I may lie if asked did I watch it by someone in real life. Every second you spend watching it you hate yourself just a little more. Some terrible acting, worse writing, the most hateful aspirational bro-dude culture is championed.

But it's got The Rock in the lead, and he is generally excellent in it. Even if most everyone else is reprehensible.
posted by Keith Talent at 11:13 AM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


On the one hand, the Rock's nostalgia run in the WWE was an embarrassing trainwreck of dated, and often brazenly offensive, callback "humor." On the other hand, Dwayne seems like a pretty alright guy and is almost unfairly charismatic.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:15 AM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


I can't really say I'm a Rock fan*, but I've come to appreciate him more over the past couple of years. Mainly this is a result of reading the fashion blog Tom and Lorenzo. I can say this, the man certainly puts forth an effort that a lot of other Hollywood guys certainly don't, and I admire his dedication to his job and his attention to detail. He seems as if he really cares about doing a good job and not coming across like a lazy, take-it-for-granted type, which is rare.

*I was going to say I can't remember the last thing I've seen him in but then I remembered that yes, I actually watch Ballers (for shame). But outside of that? I have no clue.
posted by sardonyx at 11:18 AM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


As someone who appreciates the wrasslin' in roughly the same way I appreciate EVE Online — it's fascinating to read about and I'm really glad it's in the world, but actual exposure to the source material bores and confuses me — I didn't really get The Rock's appeal until I saw him in the PKD-inspired-ish flop Southland Tales, wherein he was cast against type as a paranoid nervous wreck1 living in a surprisingly prescient media-damaged-surreal-neo-fascist near-future America, obsessed with a nonsensical baroque sci-fi end of the world scenario which turns out to be "true," insofar as it's possible to tell what counts as "true" at any point in the movie.

Here's a couple of clips of The Rock from the movie:

In which The Rock explains the plot of a sci-fi movie that he's writing/directing/starring in.

In which The Rock confronts the people behind the unexplainable scifi gibberish plot to cause the apocalypse, and also explains why he would never commit suicide.2

Truly, 2016 has taught us that the future is far more futuristic than scientists had originally predicted.

1: one of the things that made Southland Tales so interesting (and so "... interesting... but...") was that everyone in it was cast against type, so Sarah Michelle Gellar plays a deranged porn star, Jon Lovitz plays a fascist cop, The Rock plays a nervous wreck, Justin Timberlake plays a drug-addicted veteran with severe PTSD, and so forth.
2: (he does that weird twitchy finger-tenting thing throughout the movie... I don't quite get why it's so unnerving, but it really is.)

posted by You Can't Tip a Buick at 11:25 AM on November 18, 2016 [6 favorites]


I have a weird love hate relationship with The Rock, where his mere existence makes me happy but also exudes a weird air of neoliberal 'nice' douchebro that makes me think I'd probably really hate him in real life.

That being said, his stint in Pain and Gain as a lolXtians bodybuilder who really hates to hurt people but is horrifyingly good at it is my favorite bonkers part of a movie that is already 400% off the rails and has no idea if it's endorsing or satirizing the worst of American masculinity. Which is basically where I'm at with my opinion on the Rock all the time already, so it's a perfect vehicle for him.
posted by WidgetAlley at 11:30 AM on November 18, 2016 [4 favorites]


My oldest boy was such a fan of the Rock that he spent hours in front of the mirror practicing the People's Eyebrow. It made him the hit of the elementary school lunch room.
posted by maurice at 11:30 AM on November 18, 2016 [2 favorites]


Oh man, Pain and Gain. What a nutso wackfest. I remember liking it.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:33 AM on November 18, 2016


I'm not into wrestling and never thought much about him. I guess it was when he started acting and I started seeing and reading interviews with him that I realized he was smart and funny and just a little charming and well now I'm totally smitten.

On preview, I liked Pain and Gain!
posted by Room 641-A at 11:42 AM on November 18, 2016


I can't really say I'm a Rock fan*, but I've come to appreciate him more over the past couple of years. Mainly this is a result of reading the fashion blog Tom and Lorenzo. I can say this, the man certainly puts forth an effort that a lot of other Hollywood guys certainly don't, and I admire his dedication to his job and his attention to detail. He seems as if he really cares about doing a good job and not coming across like a lazy, take-it-for-granted type, which is rare.

I wonder if part of that is that is being forced to put in effort because of his proportions. He's not really someone who can buy something off the rack. Now, he also strikes me as someone who doesn't half-ass anything, but when you're 6'5"/260 and already have to have your nice clothes tailored if you don't want to look like The Hulk, you're already up to 3/4-assing at a minimum.
posted by Copronymus at 11:45 AM on November 18, 2016


my favorite bonkers part of a movie that is already 400% off the rails and has no idea if it's endorsing or satirizing the worst of American masculinity

how can you choose between that and the glorious costuming though.
posted by poffin boffin at 11:45 AM on November 18, 2016 [2 favorites]


In an alternate universe, Dwayne Johnson is one of the most famous players in CFL history.
posted by stannate at 11:46 AM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


You Ain't Woman Enough (To Take My Man) (YT)

From the otherwise pretty forgettable Be Cool (2005). One of the first times I really encountered the guy---what can I say, I'm not that into wrestling. But any he-man ex-westler man enough can sing the line "...you ain't woman enough to take my man" in a pink sateen cowboysuit has my attention.
posted by bonehead at 11:46 AM on November 18, 2016 [5 favorites]


Oh yes, I was excited to see someone asked for a Dwayne Johnson action figure for MeFi's Winter Wishes Gift Drive. It should arrive today, even!
posted by Room 641-A at 11:46 AM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


My only complaint with the Rock is when he comes back for nostalgia appearances on WWE and he falls back on the dated, sexist, homophobic stuff from his Attitude Era heyday. I mean the man probably has more charisma than just about anyone on earth, plus he is such a huge draw that he can basically call the shots - so why doesn't he write better promos? You can still be a heel without calling Stephanie McMahon a slut.
posted by misskaz at 11:49 AM on November 18, 2016 [2 favorites]


when you're 6'5"/260 and already have to have your nice clothes tailored if you don't want to look like The Hulk

Meet John Cena, the man who wears Italian wool potato sacks.
posted by uncleozzy at 11:50 AM on November 18, 2016 [6 favorites]


I used to like his The Rock Obama bit on SNL, otherwise, not so much.
posted by briank at 11:54 AM on November 18, 2016


Meet John Cena, the man who wears Italian wool potato sacks.

Holy goddamn shit.

He should be ashamed for stealing that suit from Babar.
posted by Copronymus at 11:56 AM on November 18, 2016 [28 favorites]


I remember when the Rock spoke at the 2000 GOP convention. It was much cooler than the gaggle of celebrities that turned the recent Democrat convention into the Kids Choice Awards. Though it's unfortunate he was there to introduce Dennis Hastert. Oy. If Johnson is elected the next president, the WWE will have the track record of an Ivy League school when it comes to putting men in the Oval Office.

On a serious note, I am impressed how he was able to break away from McMahon's push to make him 'The Polynesian wrestler'. The WWE is weird about making minority wrestlers play up their ethnicity in not good ways.
posted by riruro at 12:01 PM on November 18, 2016


Dwayne Johnson for President? 'The Rock' says run for White House 'is alluring' and so too Rapper Kanye West used the MTV Video Music Awards last year to say he would run for the White House in 2020, while in October Mean Girls actress Lindsay Lohan captioned a photo of herself at the 2012 White House Correspondents' Dinner saying she might also run in 2020.
This bundle of awesome candidates sure to keep the GOP in power for some time to come
posted by Postroad at 12:03 PM on November 18, 2016


I met The Rock once, briefly. He was hosting an event at the movie theater where I worked, representing a charity focused on childhood nutrition and exercise programs. It was funny to see him interact with "normal" people. They talk about "star power;" being aware of a person's presence before you see they've entered a room, and it's the only time I've actually experienced it. He was head and shoulders taller than than anyone in the clustered mass of reporters and sponsors who were following him around, and his grin is visible from orbit. This noisy mob drifting around a friendly giant. Surreal and charming.

After the event he made it a point to swing by the snack bars and usher stations and quickly thank (college-aged, minimum-wage) staff members their help individually. He was probably just still in glad-handing mode, but I found extremely gracious on his part. Really made everybody's day.
posted by Phobos the Space Potato at 12:08 PM on November 18, 2016 [7 favorites]


Meet John Cena, the man who wears Italian wool potato sacks.

how can such an immense man be swimming in a suit like that, like a toddler rummaging through his dad's closet. mefite physicists please explain this violation of the laws of the universe.
posted by poffin boffin at 12:09 PM on November 18, 2016 [6 favorites]


No one else has mentioned his greatest battle of all: fighting Seven of Nine on Star Trek: Voyager? Where my Trekkies at?
posted by Halloween Jack at 12:10 PM on November 18, 2016 [7 favorites]


his baffling affection for Riddick
Pitch Black is the best GDW Traveller movie ever made.
posted by fings at 12:11 PM on November 18, 2016 [5 favorites]


neoliberal 'nice' douchebro

I know I used this term myself recently but, um, it may be time to replace it with words that mean one clear thing.
posted by atoxyl at 12:12 PM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


Dwayne Johnson for President?

I feel obligated to point out that Stone Cold Steve Austin defeated Donald Trump in the ring during Trump's short professional wrestling career. [real] If anyone ever deserved a sucker punch and a stunner it's Trump.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 12:12 PM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


how can such an immense man be swimming in a suit like that, like a toddler rummaging through his dad's closet.

John Cena's shoulders have their own zip code. Everything flows downward from that like Niagara Falls, just splashing all over the place until it disappears into a mist.
posted by Etrigan at 12:14 PM on November 18, 2016 [10 favorites]


Obligatory Monster Factory: Failing to clone The Rock in WWE 2K14

The Pebble. I just can't. Dying, even the second or third time.
posted by supercres at 12:15 PM on November 18, 2016 [4 favorites]


I don't believe in the concept of "the guilty pleasure", if you enjoy something why feel guilt?

... and then you gave a pretty quintessential example.

It's when your rational brain tells you, "I know this isn't any good and I'll look back on it in embarrassment in 20 years (or 20 minutes) but I like it right now anyway."

I prefer Goldberg. Just one move. Over and over.
posted by mrgrimm at 12:42 PM on November 18, 2016


i went to monday night raw live a few years ago when the rock was doing his nostalgia run and he was INCREDIBLE. it was the first live wrestling event i'd ever been to and it was fun but man when the rock showed up...you can instantly see how he made the crossover into film so easily. his charisma and his acting skills are incredible. dude knows how to sell it
posted by burgerrr at 12:48 PM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


neoliberal

Sorry, I probably should have said bootstrapper or something like that. He seems to really buy into the myth that if you work really really really hard you'll get what you deserve in a free-market America, etc. Less aggressively and annoyingly and certainly more compassionately than the straight-up Ayn Rand-lovin' gang of dudes in everyone's Intro to Philosophy class, but of that ilk. And it's a shame because he has such great charisma and appeal across such broad lines that I really think he could get a lot of young men to think differently about things.

That being said, I did notice and appreciate how sensitive and appropriate and non-douche-y his character was to his ex-wife and daughter in San Andreas, and how much he talks about his appreciate for his family and women in general on his IG. The Rock is selling a particular version of good-hearted masculinity, which is still not my favorite, but it does seem like he takes care not to push ideas of super aggressive male-ness in his public persona.
posted by WidgetAlley at 12:59 PM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


If you work really really hard you will be tall and charming and good looking.
posted by ian1977 at 1:08 PM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


I maintain that The Rundown is hugely underrated.

I saw it when it first came out and found it overrated. Of course, at the time they were billing it as the passing of the torch to the next great action hero (Schwarzenegger cameo and all). However, the Rock's movie career didn't take off like a rocket despite his bountiful charm, and Jason Statham ended up stealing the next action hero crown.
posted by fairmettle at 1:08 PM on November 18, 2016


I was just clowning you on the overloaded state of the word - no apology necessary.
posted by atoxyl at 2:32 PM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


I should also say that while I love The Rock's movie appearances very much and consider him one of the very best things about our popular culture, he is also responsible for the overfishing crisis in our oceans in a very personal way thanks to his consumption of 821 pounds of cod per year. He's also putting away something like 4000 eggs in a year. I'm not sure I've had 4000 eggs over my entire lifetime.
posted by Copronymus at 2:41 PM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


(Some) cod from the Pacific is sustainable now, and it looks like MSC managed North Atlantic stocks will be in the next year. It's about careful sourcing and good aquaculture. But many stocks, like the Barrents catches are still way over sustainable and should be avoided.
posted by bonehead at 2:49 PM on November 18, 2016 [2 favorites]


dude knows how to sell it

Third generation pro wrestler, inherited it from both sides:

Rocky Johnson [father]
Peter Maivia [maternal grandfather]
posted by lkc at 2:54 PM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


No mention of his formidable lip sync talents?
posted by MsMolly at 3:02 PM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


I should also say that while I love The Rock's movie appearances very much and consider him one of the very best things about our popular culture, he is also responsible for the overfishing crisis in our oceans in a very personal way thanks to his consumption of 821 pounds of cod per year.

If there's anyone in this thread who hasn't read Mallory Ortberg's reaction to this, hie thee to the Toast immediately.
posted by WidgetAlley at 3:02 PM on November 18, 2016 [9 favorites]


Also a NE PA football star
posted by 922257033c4a0f3cecdbd819a46d626999d1af4a at 4:59 PM on November 18, 2016 [1 favorite]


True story. My husband and I, before we were married and were just starting to date seriously, were chatting after dinner one night and he asked me which celebrity I'd like to have over for a dinner party, if it could be anyone. I don't remember if we ever got to his pick, because I immediately responded with an emphatic Dwayne "The Rock"Johnson. Obviously The Rock would be an amazing, gracious and thankful dinner party guest. But in addition, you know The Rock would drop the "Can you smell what the Rock is cooking" line sometime during the night. I explained all of this. My boyfriend-not-yet husband was beyond surprised. I don't watch t.v, I don't go to movies, I'm not current on wrestling or much of anything like that. But I know The Rock and I know the line. I think it helped him see me as someone who appreciates fun and knows how to pick a good dinner guest.
So thanks, The Rock, for helping in your own small way to making two people fall in love. And you're still invited to dinner anytime.
posted by heatherbeth at 5:00 PM on November 18, 2016 [12 favorites]


One of my best friends was once in an elevator with a mother and child, a boy about 10 years old, when suddenly, the mother turned to her son and yelled, seemingly unprovoked, "You may think you are The Rock, but you are NOT The Rock! You are NOT!" The boy, through tears, protested, "I'm The Rock! I'm The Rock!" This went on through the entire elevator ride.

It's one of my favourite memories and I wasn't even there. I fervently hope that boy grows up to be Dwayne Johnson someday.
posted by ilana at 7:29 PM on November 18, 2016 [10 favorites]


He's also putting away something like 4000 eggs in a year.

Now he's roughly the size of a baaaaaaaaaarge!
posted by The otter lady at 10:09 PM on November 18, 2016 [3 favorites]


This one of him singing is also pretty charming.
posted by Harald74 at 11:07 PM on November 18, 2016


prompt and relentless application of the People's Elbow in my personal life has been a godsend tbh
posted by poffin boffin at 11:38 PM on November 18, 2016


Harald74, this related video is pretty damn charming as well.

I am an unabashed "Rock" Dwayne Johnson fan. I don't know him from wrestling, but have seen far too many of his movies. From The Rundown to Southland Tales (Hi 👋 You Can't Tip A Buick). And recently Central Intelligence - which was just way better than it had any right to be. I feel like his character in that is a fictionalized and satirized version of himself. He is incredibly charming in that role. No surprise.

It's not that I've seen every movie he's in; I've missed a number. But he's just always great in his roles. I always get the impression he's just happy to be able to do what he's doing.
posted by [insert clever name here] at 1:21 AM on November 19, 2016 [4 favorites]


His Twitter is one of the few actual-person accounts i've added to my 'everything is terrible, hide here' Twitter list. (AskMe here, if anyone wants to suggest anything or steal some for themselves.)

His relentless cheerfulness and upbeat tweets, combined with Lin-Manuel Miranda's whole Twitter excellence and some puppy accounts have basically stopped me throwing myself off a bridge these last few terrible weeks.

I've also genuinely researched buying a life-size The Rock cutout, and was only stopped by the fact that no-one seems to ship them outside the US for less than $100 shipping. The second that day comes, though, i'ma do it and NO-ONE CAN STOP ME.
posted by pseudonymph at 8:17 AM on November 19, 2016 [2 favorites]


well, that's one thing about the United States that's still good, I guess. We have ready access to affordable life-size The Rock cutouts.
posted by You Can't Tip a Buick at 7:51 PM on November 19, 2016 [2 favorites]


Fun Fact: The Rock lived on the next street from me and his son and my son attended Kindergarten together!
posted by Katjusa Roquette at 10:57 AM on November 20, 2016


That sounds like the setup for a bit part in a terrorist thriller or the lead in a romantic comedy...
posted by tavella at 11:35 AM on November 20, 2016


"Ok, Google: Can you smell what The Rock is cooking?"
beep
"Smells like a successful career to me."
posted by Cosine at 12:34 PM on November 20, 2016


Is this where I post my Dwayne story? This is where I post my Dwayne story.

OK. I'm a 47 year old transguy who lives in a bit of a cultural bubble, and is also a student, paying his way through school. So, I don't have a lot of interest, or time, or money, for watching popular movies in the theaters. So, I knew of 'The Rock' as a wrestler from eons ago, and that was it.

When I decided to actually do something about my gender, I thought of musicians I liked for naming inspiration. I liked Dwayne Goettel of Skinny Puppy (RIP), and I also like Bones Hillman, formerly Dwayne Stevens (though that's up for debate; his real name is apparently 'Wayne') of Midnight Oil. Both are kind of obscure musicians. You can see where this is headed.

I had no idea, on God's green earth, that my new chosen name is also The Rock's, and that he was a fellow Dwayne. And that he had morphed into one of the most popular entertainers in the solar system. So, at a party, when I introduced myself with my new name, people asked me why I had named myself after The Rock.

"Who?"

All of their jaws collectively dropped, and I got a quick schooling in The Rock 101. Even now, complete strangers will hear my name, and will tell me fascinating facts about Dwayne Johnson. It's a surreal aspect of my life now, and now I feel compelled to keep up on The Rock, just to be able to converse with people about it, because it'll come up. And yes, people have told me about his infamous Cod Diet. I'm tempted to try it out - it's a Dwayne thing, see.
posted by spinifex23 at 2:27 PM on November 20, 2016 [8 favorites]


Oh, this is fun - his appearance on The Graham Norton show where he analyzed how to deliver his catchphrases.

And another appearance where he talks about his Instagram and the time he wakes up.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:29 PM on November 20, 2016 [6 favorites]


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