Everyone needs to snug
May 27, 2017 7:51 PM   Subscribe

 
(last link h/t monkeytoes)
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:52 PM on May 27, 2017


I was snickering at the Dogs Afraid Of Ridiculous Things.

Until I got to the pug.

Dear gods. I'm afraid of that too.
posted by egypturnash at 7:55 PM on May 27, 2017 [7 favorites]


Because this has been such a week why the hell not: 19 Beautifully Wholesome Tweets (CW some have dogs)
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 8:06 PM on May 27, 2017 [4 favorites]


Especially love the "Resistance Dogs" (second link).

But this must be one of the most confused dogs ever.
posted by oneswellfoop at 8:11 PM on May 27, 2017


Johnny Wallflower: my hero. <3
posted by ZakDaddy at 8:26 PM on May 27, 2017 [5 favorites]


roombas are legit terrofying
posted by PinkMoose at 8:35 PM on May 27, 2017


The bending human rules was a bit weird. I'm puzzled by people who have dogs but don't allow them on the couch or in the bedroom. I mean, why do you even have a dog?
posted by bonobothegreat at 8:55 PM on May 27, 2017 [22 favorites]


Right? Mfw I saw "is not allowed on the rug".
posted by notquitemaryann at 9:56 PM on May 27, 2017 [1 favorite]


My dog is scared of the usual things: The vacuum, people in hats, people in sunglasses, loud thunderstorms. She is suspicious of horses. She is not afraid of porcupines or skunks, but she should be.

One thing that's weird is she's afraid of skulls. A car with a skull sticker on the fender used to park out front of our house and she'd stop, brace herself, and bark and bay at the sticker until I'd drag her across the street. Not sure what that's about.

We used to live near Miramont Castle, which is famously haunted, and she'd bark and bark at one of the upper windows in particular anytime we'd walk by.
posted by mochapickle at 9:56 PM on May 27, 2017 [3 favorites]


My superpower is untraining dogs. When I was really ill but (happily) obligated to dog sit a friend's wonderful dog, I spent hours with him on the couch. Guess where he isn't allowed normally?

Dude, the battle of Having Nice Furniture is lost the second you bring home a pet. Embrace it! Nothing is better than cuddling with pupper on the couch.*

* Some humans are almost as good, in same role. They shed less, though farting is about even.
posted by maxwelton at 10:08 PM on May 27, 2017 [15 favorites]


The bending human rules was a bit weird. I'm puzzled by people who have dogs but don't allow them on the couch or in the bedroom. I mean, why do you even have a dog?

Dude. My dogs aren't allowed on the couch, they're covered in mud most of the time. They're allowed in the bedroom but not on the bed. The female has responded to this rule by refusing to get on the couch even when invited and pretending like she hates soft furnishings and wouldn't get up there anyway. I know damn well she sleeps on the bed while I'm at work (dirty pawprints) but she pretends like it's hot lava if you invite her up- what is this? It's so ~soft~. I feel uncomfortable... I'm leaving.

I did come home the other day to find both dogs cowering in my bed together, refusing to come to the door. They finally came and wrapped themselves around my legs in a dramatic furry panting tangle before escaping into the yard and safety. Turns out the battery had run out in the fire alarm and it was periodically chirping. Chirps of doom.
posted by fshgrl at 10:28 PM on May 27, 2017 [16 favorites]


The aussie is afraid of gunshots (not uncommon nor worrisome in my rural area), thunder, sudden bangs caused by things dropped accidentally, popping bubble wrap, and she's developed a fear of the little dog's sneezes. Seriously. Little dog sneezes or coughs, and the aussie will head for the hills or for the dark side of my partner's desk. Whichever is closer. However, she's great with vacuum cleaners to the point of not getting out of the way when needed.

The newfie is brave with everything that terrifies the aussie. Or she was. She gets nervous about thunder now, even though she used to be fine with it. My favorite theory is that she is not the smartest dog, and she knows she isn't very smart. However, the aussie is very smart, and the newfie knows that too. Therefore, if the aussie is afraid, then there's probably some good reason why she (the newfie) should be afraid too.

Despite the newfie's bravery in many things, she's still terrified of anything large-ish which folds from one shape into another shape. Ladders & card tables are her chief nemesis. And, this isn't exactly fear, but she does a big concern when something big is out of place. She spent half a day staring and barking at a neighbor's brand new prefab shed.

Little dog isn't afraid of much. Anything worrisome is to be either growled at, or acknowledged as a higher power by flopping on her back and showing her belly.
posted by honestcoyote at 12:42 AM on May 28, 2017 [9 favorites]


dogs, dogs, dogs, dogs
posted by idiopath at 12:59 AM on May 28, 2017 [1 favorite]


Not allowing on the couch I can get. But not allowing on the rug? That's doggone cruel.
posted by ian1977 at 3:39 AM on May 28, 2017 [1 favorite]


Reading the many adorable comments about your dogs, I feel there needs to be a new mefi semi-rule that you post links of photos of said dogs in comments. It could only make these wonderful Johnny Wallflower posts better, folks.
posted by not that mimi at 4:59 AM on May 28, 2017 [1 favorite]


Oh! Here's mine.
posted by mochapickle at 7:54 AM on May 28, 2017 [5 favorites]


I'm on vacation right now, and miss my dogs/cat v much. They're in good hands with my little brother, though. Thanks as always for the fantastic post, JW!
posted by Fig at 8:34 AM on May 28, 2017


The newfie is brave with everything that terrifies the aussie. Or she was. She gets nervous about thunder now, even though she used to be fine with it. My favorite theory is that she is not the smartest dog, and she knows she isn't very smart. However, the aussie is very smart, and the newfie knows that too. Therefore, if the aussie is afraid, then there's probably some good reason why she (the newfie) should be afraid too.

Not as far-fetched (LOL) as you might think. Dogs that live together will certainly take cues from each other.
posted by Splunge at 10:17 AM on May 28, 2017


I have considered starting a blog entitled, "Things Stringer is Afraid Of." Because in spite of being a giant, white, Alaskan Husky, he is a fraidy cat. The other day there was a box in the road where there has not a been a box in the road and he Would. Not. walk down the sidewalk past it, until I went over and kicked it out of the way, and even then he hid behind me and visibly started when I kicked it. Then he smelled it, and sure he had defended me against unknown horrors, we went on our way. There is something like this that happens every day. The other day a rabbit started off while he was peeing on a bunch of weeds that needed to be claimed and he managed to wheel around and pee in a circle like a crazed lawn sprinkler.

This morning a freak thunderstorm rolled up about 7am, and I had two dogs trying to hide underneath the sheets with me and my wife. This is my life. I am okay with it, really.
posted by 1f2frfbf at 10:29 AM on May 28, 2017 [14 favorites]


This is Stringer in all his flat, attempting to cope with the world, glory.
posted by 1f2frfbf at 10:34 AM on May 28, 2017 [13 favorites]


Not allowing on the couch I can get. But not allowing on the rug? That's doggone cruel.

My parents old female dog doesn't allow the other dogs on the living room rug. This means they have to go behind the couch or up on the fireplace and pick their way over. It's extra funny as they live in a big open plan house and the dog just drew these invisible boundaries and has enforced them with Mega Stinkeye for years now. Just one dog fucking with the others for no reason other than it amuses her.
posted by fshgrl at 1:09 AM on May 29, 2017 [5 favorites]


My dog inexplicably mistrusts people who do not ambulate in a conventional manner. This means that if you're on a skateboard or hoverboard, you're getting barked at, which has sent many a kid hightailing it in he park. But more embarrassingly, this also extends to people who limp or are on crutches. This gets pretty awkward when you live opposite a fracture clinic.
posted by Buck Alec at 6:34 AM on May 29, 2017 [7 favorites]


Mine is afraid of nothing. She galumphs through life as though it were her oyster. Her only fear is that I may not ever come home again, judging by the insistent vocalizations when I get home and the ceremonial wrapping of self around my legs. Bu then all aussies are slightly neurotic. It's a good thing she's cute
posted by LuckyMonkey21 at 1:17 PM on May 29, 2017 [3 favorites]


Our dog isn't allowed on the furniture. She used to allowed on one specific couch but she tore up a cushion so that was the end of that. She's about 90Lbs so there isn't really room for her on the bed and she wouldn't like it any way. She prefers the hardwood floor because it's cooler. She lays next to the A/C vent any time it's running.

She wasn't allowed in our basement but we recently finished it so now we let her down there now but it takes coaxing. It's surprising to me since it's so much cooler down there.
posted by VTX at 5:05 PM on May 29, 2017 [1 favorite]


My dog is pretty much allowed anywhere she wants to be. The couch, the bed, my face, anywhere except inside the chicken coop. I'm afraid she just enjoys chicken poop a little too much. Fireworks and Smoke Alarms are the scariest things in the whole wide world.
posted by Sophie1 at 8:07 AM on May 30, 2017 [3 favorites]


Some Brood X cicadas have emerged four years early, and D.C.-area residents are having interesting encounters. This comment on the story is why I love dogs:
During the last cicada outing our family dog started looking distressed as he sat in the family room. A buzzing sound became louder until our dog's mouth opened and out popped a cicada that had crawled out of his stomach. Of course unphased [sic] our dog scooped the cicada right back up and made sure to chew the second time.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 8:11 PM on May 30, 2017 [4 favorites]


I don't know if it was the socializing we did, her breed/lineage, or we just got lucky (probably a combination of all of those) but she just doesn't care about fireworks or thunder.

She'll react to them if they're really close or especially loud but even that is like, just a little ear twitch. We were at my in-laws lake place for her 1st 4th of July and I brought her out to hang out with us before the fireworks and I was planning to take her inside if she didn't like the fireworks when they started. I had prepped everyone and warned them about the ways she might react and what I would do to calm her down and reminded everyone not to worry about it as she'll worry that we're all worried so just relax and act natural. So I was all outward calm but I was ready for that dog to freak out.

So it was a little anti-climactic when she ignored them entirely. She DID really enjoy laying on the nice cool sand on the beach with almost all of her favorite people around her.
posted by VTX at 3:47 PM on May 31, 2017 [2 favorites]


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