the most intense reactions so far have been books being vomited on
September 2, 2018 6:34 PM Subscribe
Playwright and podcast writer Mac Rogers asked his Twitter followers, "Has anyone actually *literally* thrown a book they disliked across a room? So far, there are more than 2,500 replies, with a lot of Chuck Palahniuk, Donna Tartt, Outlander, and The Awakening.
Oooh easy answer to this “Magicial Thinking” by Augustan Boroughs and “How To Lose Friends And Alienate People” by that toff
Both times felt like I was trapped at a party by the most obnoxious person in the room
posted by The Whelk at 6:36 PM on September 2, 2018 [8 favorites]
Both times felt like I was trapped at a party by the most obnoxious person in the room
posted by The Whelk at 6:36 PM on September 2, 2018 [8 favorites]
The first Thomas Covenant book. I didn't pick it back up.
posted by Fizz at 6:37 PM on September 2, 2018 [20 favorites]
posted by Fizz at 6:37 PM on September 2, 2018 [20 favorites]
I know 2 people who admitted to doing so. One was someone who got to the dramatic reveal of Drizzt’s bad-ass sword’s name as “Twinkle” and just threw the book across the room in fury.
The other person was reading a different Stephen R. Donaldson book. But I think it telling that his books have now come up in this thread twice in 3 comments.
posted by greermahoney at 6:41 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
The other person was reading a different Stephen R. Donaldson book. But I think it telling that his books have now come up in this thread twice in 3 comments.
posted by greermahoney at 6:41 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
Also, I probably would have done so myself, if it weren’t for the fact that I’ve been reading ebooks for like 18 years now? I may hate a book, but I’m not smashing a device over it.
posted by greermahoney at 6:43 PM on September 2, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by greermahoney at 6:43 PM on September 2, 2018 [3 favorites]
The first Thomas Covenant book. I didn't pick it back up.
I placed it down and so don't qualify here, but I also did not re-open it to continue.
posted by deadwax at 6:45 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
I placed it down and so don't qualify here, but I also did not re-open it to continue.
posted by deadwax at 6:45 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
I know I threw Anne Rice's Tale of the Body Thief at the wall when I was oh, probably fifteen, but I honestly can't remember now which of the terrible plot points was the last straw.
(I picked it back up, and finished it, and continued to read most of the rest of the series that existed back then, so I can't even claim it reflects well on my taste.)
posted by goblin-bee at 6:48 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
(I picked it back up, and finished it, and continued to read most of the rest of the series that existed back then, so I can't even claim it reflects well on my taste.)
posted by goblin-bee at 6:48 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Yeah, the books I've wanted to do that were on my Kindle, but I'm not going to be out $90 because Camille Pagán is boring.
posted by riruro at 6:48 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by riruro at 6:48 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
From that Twitter thread:
I once sneezed while I had a horrible bloody nose, and it got all over the Agatha Christie murder mystery I was reading. Pages were splattered. So very dramatic!
(Worst part: book did not belong to me)
I had to return a copy of Colson Whitehead's The Underground Railroad to the library and, rather than depositing it in the return bin, drew a librarian's attention to my return.
Because a bunch of the pages - dozens - were gnarly with dried blood when I first got it home and opened it.
Apologetically I said "I think this needs to be...withdrawn?" while half-cracking it open for the librarian, using the plastic freezer bag I had put it in to manipulate it. She thanked me for returning in a bag because it was pretty gross.
But book throwing? I once had a book thrown across a room for me. It was in grade 2, and we had a silent reading period that lasted for 15 minutes after morning recess. I got way into a Babar book and hadn't noticed that time was up and the class had moved on to a lesson of some kind.
What I did notice was when my teacher ripped the book out of my hands and hurled it across the classroom and screamed at me to pay attention.
Fuck you, Ms. Cook.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 6:48 PM on September 2, 2018 [56 favorites]
I once sneezed while I had a horrible bloody nose, and it got all over the Agatha Christie murder mystery I was reading. Pages were splattered. So very dramatic!
(Worst part: book did not belong to me)
I had to return a copy of Colson Whitehead's The Underground Railroad to the library and, rather than depositing it in the return bin, drew a librarian's attention to my return.
Because a bunch of the pages - dozens - were gnarly with dried blood when I first got it home and opened it.
Apologetically I said "I think this needs to be...withdrawn?" while half-cracking it open for the librarian, using the plastic freezer bag I had put it in to manipulate it. She thanked me for returning in a bag because it was pretty gross.
But book throwing? I once had a book thrown across a room for me. It was in grade 2, and we had a silent reading period that lasted for 15 minutes after morning recess. I got way into a Babar book and hadn't noticed that time was up and the class had moved on to a lesson of some kind.
What I did notice was when my teacher ripped the book out of my hands and hurled it across the classroom and screamed at me to pay attention.
Fuck you, Ms. Cook.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 6:48 PM on September 2, 2018 [56 favorites]
The Giving Tree.
I was a teenager.
I still find it appalling.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 6:50 PM on September 2, 2018 [33 favorites]
I was a teenager.
I still find it appalling.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 6:50 PM on September 2, 2018 [33 favorites]
The first one I remember throwing was by Camille Paglia. I was about fifteen. I don't remember which it was, only that it was new in the nineties and had looked to me like an exciting and fresh perspective when I was in the bookstore. I remember hearing the spine crack as it hit the wall, and felt suddenly terrible, as if I had broken an animal's bone. I was raised to believe that every book was important and valuable in its own way. But then I remembered why I was mad, and decided it was my book, after all, to throw if I wanted. (Now, of course, I can't remember exactly what it was. It was probably "if women were in charge of civilization, we would still be living in grass huts," or similar.)
Funny you should bring this up when I have just Logged On to figure out who to tell about A World Lit Only By Fire by William Manchester. I bought a $1 copy of this because I thought the title was great, and all I knew about it was that it might contain some hot takes which are now dated. Come to find out it is the world's laziest heap of misconceptions about the Middle Ages. I began to realize I was basically listening to cocktail-party chatter when he talked about the dreaded iron maiden (not an actual thing) and the monstrous pedophile called the Pied Piper of Hamelin (what? no). On rare occasions, I throw a book directly into the recycling to protect people from the bad information in it. I am going to do the same with this one.
posted by Countess Elena at 6:50 PM on September 2, 2018 [13 favorites]
Funny you should bring this up when I have just Logged On to figure out who to tell about A World Lit Only By Fire by William Manchester. I bought a $1 copy of this because I thought the title was great, and all I knew about it was that it might contain some hot takes which are now dated. Come to find out it is the world's laziest heap of misconceptions about the Middle Ages. I began to realize I was basically listening to cocktail-party chatter when he talked about the dreaded iron maiden (not an actual thing) and the monstrous pedophile called the Pied Piper of Hamelin (what? no). On rare occasions, I throw a book directly into the recycling to protect people from the bad information in it. I am going to do the same with this one.
posted by Countess Elena at 6:50 PM on September 2, 2018 [13 favorites]
I was so disgusted at A Million Little Pieces that I put it through the shredder at work when I was done. Very satisfying, A+++++ would shred again.
posted by holborne at 6:51 PM on September 2, 2018 [36 favorites]
posted by holborne at 6:51 PM on September 2, 2018 [36 favorites]
The first one I remember throwing was by Camille Paglia.
TBH projectiles are the only real use for books written by Camille Paglia.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 6:52 PM on September 2, 2018 [7 favorites]
TBH projectiles are the only real use for books written by Camille Paglia.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 6:52 PM on September 2, 2018 [7 favorites]
Omg holborne you are my freaking hero!!!
posted by greermahoney at 6:52 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by greermahoney at 6:52 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
Oh god I can’t believe I forgot What to Expect When You’re Expecting. I used it to start fires in the fireplace.
I was so mad about that book.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 6:54 PM on September 2, 2018 [8 favorites]
I was so mad about that book.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 6:54 PM on September 2, 2018 [8 favorites]
I also had a teacher rip a book out of my hands and throw it across the room, Mandolin Conspiracy. Just thinking about it makes my blood boil to this day.
I am a Certified Wimp and, when reading Stephen Kings the Mist at one point I just gently set the book on the ground and walked away for a few days. I like his non-horror books, but I just can't do suspense.
I had to read The Dogs of Babel for a class and I threw that book into a campfire when I was done reading it. I'm a librarian and I don't even feel bad about incinerating it. There were descriptions of animal abuse and mutilation in that book that I considered beyond the pale. It was unnecessary, gratuitous, and it was mingled into a book that was being promoted to the Jodi Picoult/Barbara Kingsolver reader type crowd. All of us in my genre fiction class were appalled.
God I hated that book. Fuck. I haven't thought about it in years.
posted by Elly Vortex at 6:57 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
I am a Certified Wimp and, when reading Stephen Kings the Mist at one point I just gently set the book on the ground and walked away for a few days. I like his non-horror books, but I just can't do suspense.
I had to read The Dogs of Babel for a class and I threw that book into a campfire when I was done reading it. I'm a librarian and I don't even feel bad about incinerating it. There were descriptions of animal abuse and mutilation in that book that I considered beyond the pale. It was unnecessary, gratuitous, and it was mingled into a book that was being promoted to the Jodi Picoult/Barbara Kingsolver reader type crowd. All of us in my genre fiction class were appalled.
God I hated that book. Fuck. I haven't thought about it in years.
posted by Elly Vortex at 6:57 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
I was so disgusted at A Million Little Pieces that I put it through the shredder at work when I was done. Very satisfying, A+++++ would shred again.
Please tell me you stood over the shredder while shouting "Now THIS is a million little pieces, YOU HACK! More like a million little pieces OF SHIT! HA HA HA," and coworkers gathered just outside the door, looking on in concern.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 6:58 PM on September 2, 2018 [33 favorites]
Please tell me you stood over the shredder while shouting "Now THIS is a million little pieces, YOU HACK! More like a million little pieces OF SHIT! HA HA HA," and coworkers gathered just outside the door, looking on in concern.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 6:58 PM on September 2, 2018 [33 favorites]
I threw the first Game of Thrones book at my boyfriend. About 100 pages from the end, I started to worry about the characters and since he’d read it before me I thought I’d ask him.
“Love,” I said, “Does it work out? Is everyone okay?”
He looked me dead in the eye and said, “Yeah, it’s cool baby. Everything is okay in the end.”
I put a dent in the wall with the book. It’s a good thing he had good reflexes.
posted by teleri025 at 6:58 PM on September 2, 2018 [30 favorites]
“Love,” I said, “Does it work out? Is everyone okay?”
He looked me dead in the eye and said, “Yeah, it’s cool baby. Everything is okay in the end.”
I put a dent in the wall with the book. It’s a good thing he had good reflexes.
posted by teleri025 at 6:58 PM on September 2, 2018 [30 favorites]
Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code just disgusted me and I did throw it when I finished reading it. Then later I actually read Angels & Demons.
posted by fuse theorem at 7:06 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
posted by fuse theorem at 7:06 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
I did whatever the audiobook equivalent is about halfway through Peter F Hamilton's The Reality Disfunction. It was right around the time you find out the 'hero' of the story has sex with (and impregnates) the underaged daughter of one of his business associates.
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 7:06 PM on September 2, 2018
posted by Mr.Encyclopedia at 7:06 PM on September 2, 2018
I don’t think that I ever threw a book, but when I got to the very poorly considered reveal about the origins of the antagonist in The Magicians I held the book under my butt and forced myself to fart on it.
I probably would have done the same during the last twenty pages of Kafka on the Shore but it was on loan from a good friend.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 7:10 PM on September 2, 2018 [10 favorites]
I probably would have done the same during the last twenty pages of Kafka on the Shore but it was on loan from a good friend.
posted by Parasite Unseen at 7:10 PM on September 2, 2018 [10 favorites]
Countess Elena and I share the same book, A World Lit Only By Fire. I abandoned it an hour into a flight to Rome and would have thrown it if I hadn’t been on a plane. Manchester apparently did good modern history but that book was a travesty.
posted by PussKillian at 7:14 PM on September 2, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by PussKillian at 7:14 PM on September 2, 2018 [3 favorites]
Without being too specific, I wrote my thesis on a specific incident involving late 19th century Black activists defying white authorities, and being punished unjustly. One of the books I got for background research mentioned that event, but basically described it as an unruly mob being skillfully defused by authorities.
I threw the book across the room (although I aimed for a pillow since it was a library book -- but I just needed to chuck it).
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 7:16 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
I threw the book across the room (although I aimed for a pillow since it was a library book -- but I just needed to chuck it).
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 7:16 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Friday. Fuck Robert A. Heinlein, and fuck that book in particular.
posted by duffell at 7:17 PM on September 2, 2018 [21 favorites]
posted by duffell at 7:17 PM on September 2, 2018 [21 favorites]
I am so happy to see A World Lit Only By Fire in this thread. I didn’t do anything dramatic to it, but I should have.
posted by LizardBreath at 7:17 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by LizardBreath at 7:17 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Atlas Shrugged, I was 18. The only time I ever actually hurled a book, but also the first time I gave myself permission just to stop reading books that weren't worth finishing. Probably added five years to my life.
posted by ProtoStar at 7:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [9 favorites]
posted by ProtoStar at 7:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [9 favorites]
I rarely throw books because they're so heavy and my living spaces are so small BUT I throw magazines, like, all the time. The incident is usually preceded by some statement like "I wonder what I'll think of this article in the Atlantic." I've also chucked my phone at a pillow after reading something online (this site, among others, has elicited that reaction from me).
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 7:19 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 7:19 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
The Giving Tree ... I still find it appalling.
What? The Giving Tree is an exceptional cautionary tale against narcissists and codependency.
posted by sysinfo at 7:26 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
What? The Giving Tree is an exceptional cautionary tale against narcissists and codependency.
posted by sysinfo at 7:26 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
Dennis McKiernan's Iron Tower trilogy. The very first chapter is a blatant plagiarism of The Fellowship of the Ring. Thrown in the middle of chapter one and never re-opened. I memorized McKiernan's name, however, so that I would never give this man one more cent of my money.
posted by SPrintF at 7:27 PM on September 2, 2018
posted by SPrintF at 7:27 PM on September 2, 2018
We had to read The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People for work. I never had a more wasted evening.
posted by Chrysostom at 7:28 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Chrysostom at 7:28 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
Atlas Shrugged, I was 18
Same, a year later. Surprised there’s not more Ayn Rand here
posted by not_the_water at 7:29 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Same, a year later. Surprised there’s not more Ayn Rand here
posted by not_the_water at 7:29 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Please tell me you stood over the shredder while shouting "Now THIS is a million little pieces, YOU HACK! More like a million little pieces OF SHIT! HA HA HA," and coworkers gathered just outside the door, looking on in concern.
Sadly, I did not, and now I’m really disappointed in myself for missing the opportunity.
posted by holborne at 7:32 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
Sadly, I did not, and now I’m really disappointed in myself for missing the opportunity.
posted by holborne at 7:32 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
Le Carré's The Looking Glass War. He fucked over the character of Fred Leiser so gratuitously.
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:32 PM on September 2, 2018
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 7:32 PM on September 2, 2018
I threw The Peacock Spring across the room the first time I read it as a teen, because it had broken my heart.
It's a brilliant book, and it's broken my heart so many times since then, but after (like the main character) I am stronger for it.
posted by jb at 7:34 PM on September 2, 2018
It's a brilliant book, and it's broken my heart so many times since then, but after (like the main character) I am stronger for it.
posted by jb at 7:34 PM on September 2, 2018
some nonfiction book recommended on mefi about the history of dueling was so egregiously and smugly misogynistic in the very first chapter that i dropped it in a sink full of water before throwing it away so that no one else would have to suffer its horrible existence.
most of the books/series i've hated extremely (twilight, the wretched and godawful anita blake series, etc) i have actually read carefully and more than once so that i could hate them as accurately as possible.
posted by poffin boffin at 7:37 PM on September 2, 2018 [17 favorites]
most of the books/series i've hated extremely (twilight, the wretched and godawful anita blake series, etc) i have actually read carefully and more than once so that i could hate them as accurately as possible.
posted by poffin boffin at 7:37 PM on September 2, 2018 [17 favorites]
I've hated a lot of books, I've been livid about a lot of books, but I'm surprised by how many people have thrown them. Especially the people who've done actual damage to walls/furnishings.
Like if I was going to throw a book, I have had similar insta-hate experiences with the first Thomas Covenant book and with Game of Thrones, probably more so the first because I was lent the book by a *pastor* who was like "oh I heard you like fantasy novels" and I was... thirteen? And he did say he'd read it? I still haven't been figure out what to make of that. I don't think I ever even gave it back to him, because I couldn't figure out how to face a conversation about "what did you think".
posted by Sequence at 7:38 PM on September 2, 2018
Like if I was going to throw a book, I have had similar insta-hate experiences with the first Thomas Covenant book and with Game of Thrones, probably more so the first because I was lent the book by a *pastor* who was like "oh I heard you like fantasy novels" and I was... thirteen? And he did say he'd read it? I still haven't been figure out what to make of that. I don't think I ever even gave it back to him, because I couldn't figure out how to face a conversation about "what did you think".
posted by Sequence at 7:38 PM on September 2, 2018
“Love,” I said, “Does it work out? Is everyone okay?”
He looked me dead in the eye and said, “Yeah, it’s cool baby. Everything is okay in the end.”
I assume you married him in a color-themed wedding.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 7:38 PM on September 2, 2018 [17 favorites]
He looked me dead in the eye and said, “Yeah, it’s cool baby. Everything is okay in the end.”
I assume you married him in a color-themed wedding.
posted by justsomebodythatyouusedtoknow at 7:38 PM on September 2, 2018 [17 favorites]
Fuck Robert A. Heinlein, and fuck that book in particular.
Now that I recall, I also wound up to throw Stranger In a Strange Land across the room when one of the bubbly interchangeable ladies explains to Valentine that rape is usually women's fault. But it was a borrowed copy, and I had to pull my punch and let it drop instead.
posted by Countess Elena at 7:38 PM on September 2, 2018 [7 favorites]
Now that I recall, I also wound up to throw Stranger In a Strange Land across the room when one of the bubbly interchangeable ladies explains to Valentine that rape is usually women's fault. But it was a borrowed copy, and I had to pull my punch and let it drop instead.
posted by Countess Elena at 7:38 PM on September 2, 2018 [7 favorites]
I know I have done this, but I cannot remember what book it was as I evidently blocked it from memory.
Well, actually, now that I think about it, I've thrown hundreds of books but almost all of them were clearing out the storage space of the library where I worked. We just didn't have the space for them any more, the librarians withdrew them, so they were all going to be pulped.
I eventually got over my distaste for damaging books after watching a bunch of hardbacks thrown like frisbees.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 7:39 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
Well, actually, now that I think about it, I've thrown hundreds of books but almost all of them were clearing out the storage space of the library where I worked. We just didn't have the space for them any more, the librarians withdrew them, so they were all going to be pulped.
I eventually got over my distaste for damaging books after watching a bunch of hardbacks thrown like frisbees.
posted by fifteen schnitzengruben is my limit at 7:39 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
I'll just say "The Red Wedding" (although at this point it's out of the bag pop-culture-wise.)
It was more my being upset with myself than the book (fool me twice...)--and I aimed at a pillow--but it was the only time I needed to express my displeasure to the actual book.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 7:39 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
It was more my being upset with myself than the book (fool me twice...)--and I aimed at a pillow--but it was the only time I needed to express my displeasure to the actual book.
posted by ChurchHatesTucker at 7:39 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
(I was giving Stranger a try because a male friend explained that it was deeply important to him as a person. Later, I felt lesser and small for getting hung up on that point, but I was stubborn enough to stick to it. I don't feel small for it now.)
posted by Countess Elena at 7:40 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
posted by Countess Elena at 7:40 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
Angela’s Ashes. I don’t remember what disgusted me but I remember being shocked that I’d thrown it and then shocked to realize I’d never done that before.
posted by annathea at 7:44 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by annathea at 7:44 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
I’m so loving this thread because you’re all doing the lord’s work by telling us what books never to read. Life is too short to read shitty books.
posted by greermahoney at 7:47 PM on September 2, 2018 [17 favorites]
posted by greermahoney at 7:47 PM on September 2, 2018 [17 favorites]
Life is too short to read shitty books.
I've finished way too many terrible books out of pure stubbornness. These days I'm much faster to drop a book early if it clearly isn't to my liking.
posted by Dip Flash at 7:55 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
I've finished way too many terrible books out of pure stubbornness. These days I'm much faster to drop a book early if it clearly isn't to my liking.
posted by Dip Flash at 7:55 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Cloud Atlas, but it was a library book and assigned for a class so I only threw it on the bed where I was reading it. But, like, aggressively.
This was about a year and a half ago, and I am finally at the point where I pace in circles having a conversation with myself about how awful that book and the people who praise it are only about, oh, once every two weeks, instead of every other day.
posted by brook horse at 8:05 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
This was about a year and a half ago, and I am finally at the point where I pace in circles having a conversation with myself about how awful that book and the people who praise it are only about, oh, once every two weeks, instead of every other day.
posted by brook horse at 8:05 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
My first quarter at UC Santa Barbara I took a history class for general ed requirements. One of the texts was a book entitled A History of Colonial America from 1492 to (some date I don’t remember). It was a big thick paperback and written in a turgid serious Marxist style that was just plain awful. The professor loved it. My roommate was also in the class. After the final, we threw our books over the cliff down to the beach. On the beach over a small BBQ pit we burned our books page by page. It was most satisfying. This was the only book I ever threw or burned. I have an apartment filled with thousands of books. I’m in bookstores all the time. Obviously. But for whatever reason, this dire tome got thrown. And cremated. RIP.
posted by njohnson23 at 8:06 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by njohnson23 at 8:06 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
I drilled a hole through Elizabeth Wurtzel's face on the cover of "Prozac Nation" with a drill press at the behest of my now-wife, who absolutely hated the book.
posted by Mr.Krotpong at 8:07 PM on September 2, 2018 [18 favorites]
posted by Mr.Krotpong at 8:07 PM on September 2, 2018 [18 favorites]
Mr.Krotpong, I had forgotten, but now that I think about it I believe I also threw Prozac Nation at my bed (also a library book for a class).
posted by brook horse at 8:10 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by brook horse at 8:10 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
Crime and Punishment. The protagonist was infuriatingly idiotic. I assume that "The Idiot" was a sequel, starring the same protagonist, but I've never read it.
posted by smcameron at 8:12 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by smcameron at 8:12 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
I hurled Tess of the d’Urbervilles and Jude the Obscure right across the room, and haven’t bothered with Thomas Hardy since. You can’t say I didn’t try.
Also I WOULD have hurled Laurell K. Hamilton’s Danse Macabre across the room had it belonged to me, but alas was constrained to returning it to the friend I had borrowed it from with a strong recommendation that it be set on fire.
posted by angeline at 8:14 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Also I WOULD have hurled Laurell K. Hamilton’s Danse Macabre across the room had it belonged to me, but alas was constrained to returning it to the friend I had borrowed it from with a strong recommendation that it be set on fire.
posted by angeline at 8:14 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Thomas Hardy's Jude the Obscure. To avoid spoilers, I will only say the misery kept piling up and up, and then came the words "Done because we are too menny". If Hardy had only spelled it "many", the book would not have been hurled.
Jinx, angeline!
posted by dannyboybell at 8:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
Jinx, angeline!
posted by dannyboybell at 8:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
Infinite Jest, the moment I reached the end and discovered there was no ending. It's still one of my favorites and I've reread it multiple times. But man, you have to love the journey because there is absolutely no destination to be found. The book just stops, which is infuriating if you're expecting some narrative closure.
The point I bailed on Stranger in a Strange Land was the sudden, inexplicable scene involving two angels talking to each other in heaven. If memory serves, there had been zero references to God or Christianity up to that point. The scene just landed out of nowhere like a turd in a punch bowl.
posted by dephlogisticated at 8:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
The point I bailed on Stranger in a Strange Land was the sudden, inexplicable scene involving two angels talking to each other in heaven. If memory serves, there had been zero references to God or Christianity up to that point. The scene just landed out of nowhere like a turd in a punch bowl.
posted by dephlogisticated at 8:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Gem from @Pinboard
> I would have done the same with Infinite Jest except I lacked the upper body strength. So I just angrily dropped it.
posted by idiopath at 8:20 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
> I would have done the same with Infinite Jest except I lacked the upper body strength. So I just angrily dropped it.
posted by idiopath at 8:20 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
I hate Ayn Rand with the fire of a thousand suns, and Atlas Shrugged is also the book I threw, after only a couple of chapters, when I was about 16.
Since my husband is in the book business, we wind up with a variety of free books, and I regularly distribute them around our local little free libraries. There are 6 little free libraries around in my neighborhood that I go to regularly. There are some execrable books that wind up in them (and way too many copies of the Book of Mormon). I usually try to restrain myself from censorship, no matter how tempting, but I admit that I throw away any Ayn Rand books I come across in them.
posted by gudrun at 8:25 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
Since my husband is in the book business, we wind up with a variety of free books, and I regularly distribute them around our local little free libraries. There are 6 little free libraries around in my neighborhood that I go to regularly. There are some execrable books that wind up in them (and way too many copies of the Book of Mormon). I usually try to restrain myself from censorship, no matter how tempting, but I admit that I throw away any Ayn Rand books I come across in them.
posted by gudrun at 8:25 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
I threw “Black House”, the sequel to The Talisman by King and Straub. 600 pages of exposition and 50 pages of plot. The end! Although it’s been long enough, maybe I’m not remembering correctly about its contents.
I didn’t throw the book, but I gleefully dismembered and literally lit on fire my assigned copy of “The Sand County Almanac”, some unbelievably boring piece of shit that every incoming freshman had to read when I went to college. I only singed a few pages since I was still on campus at the time, so it was mostly symbolic, but still.
posted by Autumnheart at 8:29 PM on September 2, 2018
I didn’t throw the book, but I gleefully dismembered and literally lit on fire my assigned copy of “The Sand County Almanac”, some unbelievably boring piece of shit that every incoming freshman had to read when I went to college. I only singed a few pages since I was still on campus at the time, so it was mostly symbolic, but still.
posted by Autumnheart at 8:29 PM on September 2, 2018
I love books and have always treated them with respect. One exception comes to mind.
An in-law unwilling to accept my anti-religious views gave me a book last Christmas that was written by a popular Christian writer. She made me promise to give it a read. Its ideological inconsistencies and meaningless pop aphorisms were bad enough, but to make matters worse it was poorly written. I lasted maybe ten pages before hurling it across the room where it fell behind a sofa. Later when she asked about it I told her it had gone missing. I think it’s still there.
posted by kinnakeet at 8:30 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
An in-law unwilling to accept my anti-religious views gave me a book last Christmas that was written by a popular Christian writer. She made me promise to give it a read. Its ideological inconsistencies and meaningless pop aphorisms were bad enough, but to make matters worse it was poorly written. I lasted maybe ten pages before hurling it across the room where it fell behind a sofa. Later when she asked about it I told her it had gone missing. I think it’s still there.
posted by kinnakeet at 8:30 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
Twilight. Ugh, and I was so happy when I first found it in my hotel room (this was before e-readers and I was out of books), but what a load of vampiric shit.
posted by The Toad at 8:34 PM on September 2, 2018
posted by The Toad at 8:34 PM on September 2, 2018
My Cousin, My Gastroenterologist, thrown into a fireplace.
posted by nicwolff at 8:37 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by nicwolff at 8:37 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
Clive Barker's Imajica. Like, 900 pages into it and another 200 to go.
posted by Cookiebastard at 8:37 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Cookiebastard at 8:37 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
Do textbooks count? Because I'm pretty sure I threw my Finite Math textbook on the floor a few times when I was a freshman in college.
posted by SisterHavana at 8:39 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by SisterHavana at 8:39 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
Many years ago, I used to go to this lecture series at the local university that brought in big-name writers to talk about their work. One of the best lectures I ever went to was by John Irving, although I am not a fan of his work (I tried to re-read A Prayer for Owen Meany a couple years ago and was so repulsed by the blame-the-victim sex abuse of the female cousin in the opening chapters that I had to forcefully remind myself about how important the free press is). A Widow for One Year was just about to come out, and for his lecture, Irving read the first draft of a chapter, and we were all like, wow, pretty good. And then he read the revision of that chapter. It was a terrific writing lesson.
He told a story about being on a plane back in the day, before he was really well-established. He was thrilled to see another passenger reading The World According to Garp. Until the passenger huffed in disgust, tore the paperback in half along the spine, and stuffed it derisively into the seat-back pocket.
It was a very long flight. The passenger eventually fished it out again, having nothing else to do.
Also, I totally get throwing The Awakening. "So, Kate Chopin, you're saying that a woman only has two ways out of a bad marriage: his death, or hers?" "Yes."
I have a question similar to this one that I've been meaning to post at AskMe: Has anybody ever actually been so shocked they just dropped whatever they were holding ("the glass dropped from her nerveless fingers, shattering on the slate floor")?
posted by Orlop at 8:44 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
He told a story about being on a plane back in the day, before he was really well-established. He was thrilled to see another passenger reading The World According to Garp. Until the passenger huffed in disgust, tore the paperback in half along the spine, and stuffed it derisively into the seat-back pocket.
It was a very long flight. The passenger eventually fished it out again, having nothing else to do.
Also, I totally get throwing The Awakening. "So, Kate Chopin, you're saying that a woman only has two ways out of a bad marriage: his death, or hers?" "Yes."
I have a question similar to this one that I've been meaning to post at AskMe: Has anybody ever actually been so shocked they just dropped whatever they were holding ("the glass dropped from her nerveless fingers, shattering on the slate floor")?
posted by Orlop at 8:44 PM on September 2, 2018 [6 favorites]
It was a library book so I didn't throw it but I remember slamming it shut and announcing loudly "it's the fucking French Revolution with fairies!"
And then there was the library book I DNFed in the first chapter at "Hate swam visibly through her veins." Oh really? Was it doing the backstroke?
Life is too short. Somewhat counterintuitively, realizing that I can and often should put a book down if I'm not getting anything out of it has made me more willing to explore stuff I might not have tried.
posted by Lexica at 8:46 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
And then there was the library book I DNFed in the first chapter at "Hate swam visibly through her veins." Oh really? Was it doing the backstroke?
Life is too short. Somewhat counterintuitively, realizing that I can and often should put a book down if I'm not getting anything out of it has made me more willing to explore stuff I might not have tried.
posted by Lexica at 8:46 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
It was a library book so I didn't throw it but I remember slamming it shut and announcing loudly "it's the fucking French Revolution with fairies!"
really? qu'est-ce que c'est? I want to rubberneck at it.
posted by Countess Elena at 8:52 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
really? qu'est-ce que c'est? I want to rubberneck at it.
posted by Countess Elena at 8:52 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
"Hate swam visibly through her veins."
Unless the character had transparent flesh, I have another issue with that line, as well. Yeesh.
posted by greermahoney at 8:52 PM on September 2, 2018
Unless the character had transparent flesh, I have another issue with that line, as well. Yeesh.
posted by greermahoney at 8:52 PM on September 2, 2018
I was forced to read The Way Of The Peaceful Warrior as a freshman in college. At the end of the quarter I burned it rather than selling it because I couldn’t let myself be responsible for someone else reading the thing.
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 8:55 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Tell Me No Lies at 8:55 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
I couldn't bring myself to harm a library book, but I really wanted to throw Zorba the Greek.
posted by aws17576 at 8:57 PM on September 2, 2018
posted by aws17576 at 8:57 PM on September 2, 2018
One of the Game of Thrones books, possibly the third, when I realized that he wasn't going to progress any of the earlier character arcs, he was gonna just keep introducing new characters.
Threw it at the wall and it made a more satisfying thump that any of the stories within.
posted by Sphinx at 9:00 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
Threw it at the wall and it made a more satisfying thump that any of the stories within.
posted by Sphinx at 9:00 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
It was already beat up, my town library's copy of The Stand, so I didn't feel bad about throwing it across the room when he killed my favorite character.
I mean, I finished it, I've read it a few more times since, but I was 12, and I was so mad!
posted by Mister Moofoo at 9:03 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
I mean, I finished it, I've read it a few more times since, but I was 12, and I was so mad!
posted by Mister Moofoo at 9:03 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
Wicked, by Gregory Maguire. It's just, "What if someone read a bunch of Tolkien in undergrad, and then took one literary theory class, and then wrote a book that was dull and pretentious and weirdly smutty at the same time?" The whole book I was waiting for Dorothy to show up and the plot to kick in... and then Dorothy douses the witch, she melts, the end. And I hucked it across the room and never bothered with the rest of the series.
I read it after watching and loving the musical, though, and have met plenty of people who read the book first and loved it, then hated the musical. IMO, the musical actually hits the points the book was trying to make.
posted by skullhead at 9:06 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
I read it after watching and loving the musical, though, and have met plenty of people who read the book first and loved it, then hated the musical. IMO, the musical actually hits the points the book was trying to make.
posted by skullhead at 9:06 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
Does it count to toss it lazily on the floor, and then later kick it under the bed, and then keep kicking it back under the bed every time it had the nerve to poke its bloated, unfocused red cover back out into the the daylight? Because that's what I did with Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell. A friend recommended it with the note that it has all the things I like in a book. What he failed to mention is that it will talk around all the things I like in a book without focusing on or describing any of them, and then revert back to page after page of understated and boring as f*ck tension between characters.
posted by ga$money at 9:09 PM on September 2, 2018 [13 favorites]
posted by ga$money at 9:09 PM on September 2, 2018 [13 favorites]
This question was asked previously, in the green. (But that was almost ten years ago.)
posted by Rash at 9:10 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Rash at 9:10 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
Consciously thrown? A few, The Princess Bride being thrown with particular vim as the author’s contempt for the characters and the reader became too much to take.
For me more interesting is the time my arm threw a Dan Brown book across the room without any conscious intervention. It just straightened and off the book flew after 2 pages. I can only assume this was some kind of hardwired protection mechanism more usually invoked in the face of the Necronomicon or other such unspeakable books.
posted by fallingbadgers at 9:14 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
For me more interesting is the time my arm threw a Dan Brown book across the room without any conscious intervention. It just straightened and off the book flew after 2 pages. I can only assume this was some kind of hardwired protection mechanism more usually invoked in the face of the Necronomicon or other such unspeakable books.
posted by fallingbadgers at 9:14 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
Infinite Jest, the moment I reached the end and discovered there was no ending.
Exactly what I did, and it was not a pretty scene, since I was reading in the bathtub. Splash, squish, smoosh. In my case it was realizing that yes, of course I missed something; I knew I would. Which meant I would have to start over and read it again immediately, which of course led to the aforementioned and on-topic hurling. (It does sort of have an ending, of course, though since it happens many chapters before the last, and it's hard to recognize it as such the first time through.)
Despite the fact he's not exactly the most beloved writer on MeFi anymore for unrelated reasons, that book remains a mind-abducting masterpiece. I haven't done a full read for many years now, but I still flip it open to random pages now and then and marvel at the craft.
posted by rokusan at 9:16 PM on September 2, 2018 [3 favorites]
Exactly what I did, and it was not a pretty scene, since I was reading in the bathtub. Splash, squish, smoosh. In my case it was realizing that yes, of course I missed something; I knew I would. Which meant I would have to start over and read it again immediately, which of course led to the aforementioned and on-topic hurling. (It does sort of have an ending, of course, though since it happens many chapters before the last, and it's hard to recognize it as such the first time through.)
Despite the fact he's not exactly the most beloved writer on MeFi anymore for unrelated reasons, that book remains a mind-abducting masterpiece. I haven't done a full read for many years now, but I still flip it open to random pages now and then and marvel at the craft.
posted by rokusan at 9:16 PM on September 2, 2018 [3 favorites]
The Tale of Genji. Was taking Japanese Lit in Translation after three years of Japanese, and while reading it on the steps of the East Mall at the foot of the UT Tower, I thought to myself "this Genji is a total zero. You know what? I'm never going to Japan." I skipped the book like a stone across the lake of Texas limestone and went to Milto's for a slice of pizza.
I never went to Japan.
posted by lefty lucky cat at 9:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
I never went to Japan.
posted by lefty lucky cat at 9:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [4 favorites]
I remember slamming it shut and announcing loudly "it's the fucking French Revolution with fairies!"
Jesus, Mary and Jor-El, don't leave us hanging like this!
posted by rokusan at 9:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [12 favorites]
Jesus, Mary and Jor-El, don't leave us hanging like this!
posted by rokusan at 9:18 PM on September 2, 2018 [12 favorites]
Dan Brown's been mentioned twice already, so I'll go with the only other book I actually threw...The Lovely Bones. I struggled through that book thinking eventually I'd get to the end and it would justify the accolades I'd kept hearing. Then I got to the scene where Susie gets her "second chance." Pretty sure the mark is still on the wall of the place I was living at the time.
posted by Preserver at 9:25 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
posted by Preserver at 9:25 PM on September 2, 2018 [5 favorites]
I had to teach Fire on the Mountain, by Anita Desai. My apologies to those of you who have read it, but that book was required reading for all English Composition students that year at Iona College (New Rochelle, NY), and I did not but should have thrown that book as far as possible. After that, I should have thrown whoever recommended it. It was the most mean-spirited bit of writing, and a principal character was given a miserable fate thoroughly undeserved.
And as for The Giving Tree--even Shel Silverstein wished he hadn't written it. That should give you an idea...
posted by datawrangler at 9:54 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
And as for The Giving Tree--even Shel Silverstein wished he hadn't written it. That should give you an idea...
posted by datawrangler at 9:54 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
I'm happy that time has erased from my memory the name and author of the book I once threw. In college, when I couldn't return a textbook because a new edition was coming out, I charred my copy of the old edition and left the remains in a bag on the prof's door with a note wishing him a Merry Christmas. That piss-poor excuse for a teacher had ruined what had previously been a subject of interest for me.
As for Heinlein's Friday, I simply closed it after three pages and returned it whence it came. Thus ended the reading of his words.
posted by bryon at 9:59 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
As for Heinlein's Friday, I simply closed it after three pages and returned it whence it came. Thus ended the reading of his words.
posted by bryon at 9:59 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
A story I've heard was that Stanley Kubrick was looking for a book to turn into his next movie, so he takes a stack of paper backs into his office. For the next hour, Kubrick's secretary hears a loud THUD every five minutes as Kubrick picks up a book, reads a few pages, decides he doesn't like it and then chucks it at the wall. The thuds finally stopped and the secretary pops her head in to see what he's reading, and it's "The Shining".
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI at 10:23 PM on September 2, 2018 [7 favorites]
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI at 10:23 PM on September 2, 2018 [7 favorites]
The Native Tongue Trilogy, vol. 3, by Suzette Hayden Elgin. My rage was incandescent when I read volume three, which totally subverted the plot and characters of vols. one and two. I read the whole thing, thinking surely it will tie back into the first two neatly. It did not. I tossed it across the room (but it was only a small paperback so the visceral satisfaction was low). I was so pissed. And I still am.
posted by MovableBookLady at 10:23 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by MovableBookLady at 10:23 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
Once picked up an Ayn Rand paperback for a quarter at a garage sale (before I realized what her ideology was), never got around to reading it, and pitched it into a recycling bin instead of donating it to a thrift store or whatnot. Does that count?
Tried to read "Rock and the Pop Narcotic" since some folks had recommended it, but it was so pretentious and high-school-provocateurish (oh, he keeps saying "fag", how edgy) that I gave up after a couple of chapters and flipped it onto the couch with a disinterested shrug. Fortunately I picked it up for pretty cheap so I was able to make my money back selling it to the local used bookstore.
posted by gtrwolf at 10:44 PM on September 2, 2018
Tried to read "Rock and the Pop Narcotic" since some folks had recommended it, but it was so pretentious and high-school-provocateurish (oh, he keeps saying "fag", how edgy) that I gave up after a couple of chapters and flipped it onto the couch with a disinterested shrug. Fortunately I picked it up for pretty cheap so I was able to make my money back selling it to the local used bookstore.
posted by gtrwolf at 10:44 PM on September 2, 2018
(Worst part: book did not belong to me)
Best part: You picked the perfect book to mark in this way.
posted by Paul Slade at 10:44 PM on September 2, 2018
Best part: You picked the perfect book to mark in this way.
posted by Paul Slade at 10:44 PM on September 2, 2018
Throwing textbooks definitely counts. In grade school, we did that a lot, hurling a textbook over the classroom in contempt, excitement, or boredom. I can't remember clearly whether I did it, but probably yes. The books were paperbacks, without hard corners, and I don't remember anyone got hurt.
posted by runcifex at 10:49 PM on September 2, 2018
posted by runcifex at 10:49 PM on September 2, 2018
It was a copy of Asimov's. There was a two-part story by Rudy Rucker and Bruce Sterling, and I was so excited about it until I read it. I don't remember the story, but I remember my disappointment and anger as I read it, then stewed for a month until part two came in the next edition. That was the one I took to my boss's office (he was also a writer, and it was his copy of Asimov's), knocked on the door, then threw it at his wall. He laughed and agreed it was a let-down.
Also, I burned the relationship book my then-girlfriend had given me after she broke up with me. Petty, yes, but fuck you, John Gray, and fuck your book.
posted by RakDaddy at 10:50 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
Also, I burned the relationship book my then-girlfriend had given me after she broke up with me. Petty, yes, but fuck you, John Gray, and fuck your book.
posted by RakDaddy at 10:50 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
This question was asked previously, in the green. (But that was almost ten years ago.)
Looking back on that thread, I have to ask in all seriousness: is there anyone out there that actually LIKED The DaVinci Code?
posted by gtrwolf at 10:59 PM on September 2, 2018
Looking back on that thread, I have to ask in all seriousness: is there anyone out there that actually LIKED The DaVinci Code?
posted by gtrwolf at 10:59 PM on September 2, 2018
is there anyone out there that actually LIKED The DaVinci Code?
I did not hate it at the time and that’s as far as I’ll go. It was, at least, a quick read that kept moving.
posted by greermahoney at 11:10 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
I did not hate it at the time and that’s as far as I’ll go. It was, at least, a quick read that kept moving.
posted by greermahoney at 11:10 PM on September 2, 2018 [2 favorites]
Also I WOULD have hurled Laurell K. Hamilton’s Danse Macabre across the room had it belonged to me
again, i cannot stress enough to everyone here how fucking dreadful laurell k hamilton's writing is. it is so bad. it is the worst. every moment of reading that drivel is spent being angry about all past reading moments that led to that moment and all future reading moments you already hate yourself for which are going to happen anyway so you can discuss its endless and inexcusable failings repeatedly and at length.
i also had a totally different book in mind to mention as i scrolled down to the comment box and i have forgotten it completely, so consumed am i by hate for Laurell fucKing Hamilton
posted by poffin boffin at 11:20 PM on September 2, 2018 [11 favorites]
again, i cannot stress enough to everyone here how fucking dreadful laurell k hamilton's writing is. it is so bad. it is the worst. every moment of reading that drivel is spent being angry about all past reading moments that led to that moment and all future reading moments you already hate yourself for which are going to happen anyway so you can discuss its endless and inexcusable failings repeatedly and at length.
i also had a totally different book in mind to mention as i scrolled down to the comment box and i have forgotten it completely, so consumed am i by hate for Laurell fucKing Hamilton
posted by poffin boffin at 11:20 PM on September 2, 2018 [11 favorites]
OH RIGHT it was the humiliating tale i am certain i have recounted here before of deliberately abandoning a rubbishy but satisfyingly long book under my business class seat on a cathay pacific flight to beijing; my connection out of narita (maybe hong kong? idk) was 8 hours later and i'd had a lovely nap and shower in one of the lovely nap and shower rooms and was on my way to the departure gate when i heard someone -- horribly as this is a nightmare scenario to me -- calling my name, loudly, in public. it was a smiling uniformed cathay pacific flight attendant who was extremely delighted to have found me at last, and handed over in public view of god and everyone my large and terrible book, for which i was forced in return to express similar extreme delight and thank him profusely.
i later threw it away in a bathroom of the beijing airport and have since been afraid to return lest someone brandish it excitedly upon seeing my passport at customs.
posted by poffin boffin at 11:26 PM on September 2, 2018 [28 favorites]
i later threw it away in a bathroom of the beijing airport and have since been afraid to return lest someone brandish it excitedly upon seeing my passport at customs.
posted by poffin boffin at 11:26 PM on September 2, 2018 [28 favorites]
The only book I have ever literally thrown across the room was a copy of Australia's Most Dangerous which my (now ex, then partner) had given me for my birthday. I unwrapped it excitedly, knowing it was going to be a book, and then the GIANT FUNNELWEB SPIDER OF TERROR was revealed and completely without thinking, I launched it across the room.
It was not an actual funnelweb, it was a picture of one. Larger than life. Because that's what you need on the front cover of a book to induce people to pick it up.
Prior to working in a lending public library, there were two books I threw into the recycling bin so that no one else would ever ever be subjected to them again. One was a copy of Carolyn Keene's The clue in the crossword cipher (The one where Nancy Drew goes to Peru and encounters the Nazca lines; I had found it in a secondhand shop as an adult and bought it for the princely sum of $0.50, thinking it might be a nice nostalgic revisiting of the series I loved as a child. It was not.) and the other I cannot actually remember the title, except that it had my actual name in it, and again had bought secondhand for a small sum just because it had my name in the title. It was a crappy romance and I thoroughly enjoyed recycling it.
Since working at a public library where we are constantly having to get rid of books to make room for new books, I have lost track of how many books I have placed, tossed or otherwise put in the bin, but it's a lot. I do occasionally rescue them and take them home, but I have to really really like it. I have even brought some of mine from home to do the same thing with. Nothing inures you to discarding books like working in a library.
posted by Athanassiel at 11:35 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
It was not an actual funnelweb, it was a picture of one. Larger than life. Because that's what you need on the front cover of a book to induce people to pick it up.
Prior to working in a lending public library, there were two books I threw into the recycling bin so that no one else would ever ever be subjected to them again. One was a copy of Carolyn Keene's The clue in the crossword cipher (The one where Nancy Drew goes to Peru and encounters the Nazca lines; I had found it in a secondhand shop as an adult and bought it for the princely sum of $0.50, thinking it might be a nice nostalgic revisiting of the series I loved as a child. It was not.) and the other I cannot actually remember the title, except that it had my actual name in it, and again had bought secondhand for a small sum just because it had my name in the title. It was a crappy romance and I thoroughly enjoyed recycling it.
Since working at a public library where we are constantly having to get rid of books to make room for new books, I have lost track of how many books I have placed, tossed or otherwise put in the bin, but it's a lot. I do occasionally rescue them and take them home, but I have to really really like it. I have even brought some of mine from home to do the same thing with. Nothing inures you to discarding books like working in a library.
posted by Athanassiel at 11:35 PM on September 2, 2018 [1 favorite]
The Celestine fucking Prophecy
posted by panama joe at 12:12 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by panama joe at 12:12 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
I literally threw Sarah Waters' Affinity, apparently, though I don't remember this, while making a hissing and growling noise somewhere between a tea kettle and a very annoyed cat. A more gratuitous case of cruelty to both main character and reader I have never encountered, and I am a professional book reviewer.
After that for some years we used our copy as a prop for tilting furniture, a weight, a wedge, etcetera, though eventually we stopped and got rid of it because I kept looking at situations and going 'oh no there's a book there we're damaging that book oh wait it's only the Sarah FUCKING Waters' and getting mad all over again.
posted by Rush-That-Speaks at 12:15 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
After that for some years we used our copy as a prop for tilting furniture, a weight, a wedge, etcetera, though eventually we stopped and got rid of it because I kept looking at situations and going 'oh no there's a book there we're damaging that book oh wait it's only the Sarah FUCKING Waters' and getting mad all over again.
posted by Rush-That-Speaks at 12:15 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks. Ugh what sappy drivel.
I would have thrown a lot more books at a wall since then but that’s another downside of Kindles.
posted by like_neon at 12:36 AM on September 3, 2018
I would have thrown a lot more books at a wall since then but that’s another downside of Kindles.
posted by like_neon at 12:36 AM on September 3, 2018
It was a library book so I didn't throw it but I remember slamming it shut and announcing loudly "it's the fucking French Revolution with fairies!"
really? qu'est-ce que c'est? I want to rubberneck at it.
This is surely Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell?
Despite being a Victorianist, I once threw Adam Bede while in graduate school. Not because I disliked Adam Bede, but because I had it as assigned reading four times in two years.
I strongly considered throwing The Rise and Fall of D.O.D.O., except that I was on an airplane en route to London.
Meanwhile, now I'm wondering if my students are hurling Jude the Obscure whenever I teach it. (ME: Good morning, everyone! So, you've reached that scene. STUDENTS: AARRRRGGGGH)
posted by thomas j wise at 12:49 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
really? qu'est-ce que c'est? I want to rubberneck at it.
This is surely Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell?
Despite being a Victorianist, I once threw Adam Bede while in graduate school. Not because I disliked Adam Bede, but because I had it as assigned reading four times in two years.
I strongly considered throwing The Rise and Fall of D.O.D.O., except that I was on an airplane en route to London.
Meanwhile, now I'm wondering if my students are hurling Jude the Obscure whenever I teach it. (ME: Good morning, everyone! So, you've reached that scene. STUDENTS: AARRRRGGGGH)
posted by thomas j wise at 12:49 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
Looking back on that thread, I have to ask in all seriousness: is there anyone out there that actually LIKED The DaVinci Code?
I for one got a healthy dose of LOOK AT THOSE IDIOTS from it, but it gets old pretty fast.
posted by each day we work at 12:50 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I for one got a healthy dose of LOOK AT THOSE IDIOTS from it, but it gets old pretty fast.
posted by each day we work at 12:50 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Secrets of the Baby Whisperer when my baby was a couple of months old. ‘Accidentally parent’ that, you smug guilt-tripping waste of wood pulp.
posted by Catseye at 1:07 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by Catseye at 1:07 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
A friend of mine refused to read any fiction for more than two years after Ian McEwan's Atonement. The book did not get thrown but she was so furious about his manipulation of the reader that she would have stabbed him had she the chance.
posted by humuhumu at 1:36 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by humuhumu at 1:36 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
This thread is an illuminating read. I don't think I've ever engaged with any fictional piece of media enough to become angry at it. If it's bad for some reason, I decide it's not worth my time and abandon it. But overall my stance towards all fiction in any media is "it's fictional things happening to fictional people, so IDGAF", which means that e.g. no matter what horrible things happen to or are perpetraded by the characters, it doesn't get to me. I assume I'm in the minority here. My wife engages heavily with a certain fandom, and we cannot see eye to eye on this point at all.
Example: people lost their shit over the ending of Mass Effect 3, but I laughed it off. (Minor spoilers follow.) The game making a point that none of what you did during the whole trilogy really mattered in the end, that the final choices available to you were basically set in stone a long time ago when the cycle started? I chose to read it as a ballsy move and a wonderfully cynical commentary on the futility of human life and endeavors. (Of course, in reality it was probably just lazy storytelling and the lack of time, resources or ideas to tie the ending into your actual gameplay actions in any meaningful way, but, as usual, IDGAF. The journey mattered more than the destination.)
posted by jklaiho at 1:44 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Example: people lost their shit over the ending of Mass Effect 3, but I laughed it off. (Minor spoilers follow.) The game making a point that none of what you did during the whole trilogy really mattered in the end, that the final choices available to you were basically set in stone a long time ago when the cycle started? I chose to read it as a ballsy move and a wonderfully cynical commentary on the futility of human life and endeavors. (Of course, in reality it was probably just lazy storytelling and the lack of time, resources or ideas to tie the ending into your actual gameplay actions in any meaningful way, but, as usual, IDGAF. The journey mattered more than the destination.)
posted by jklaiho at 1:44 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Looking back on that thread, I have to ask in all seriousness: is there anyone out there that actually LIKED The DaVinci Code?
*raises hand*
It was a fun page turner. I use to read a lot of Dean Koontz for the same junk food buzz. I'd take either author over Nicholas Sparks anyday.
posted by like_neon at 1:48 AM on September 3, 2018 [5 favorites]
*raises hand*
It was a fun page turner. I use to read a lot of Dean Koontz for the same junk food buzz. I'd take either author over Nicholas Sparks anyday.
posted by like_neon at 1:48 AM on September 3, 2018 [5 favorites]
Nicholas Sparks is mostly infuriating when you are combing used bookstores for Muriel Spark.
posted by lefty lucky cat at 1:58 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by lefty lucky cat at 1:58 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
Count me in for (metaphorical) Dan Brown wall-throwing.
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 2:02 AM on September 3, 2018
posted by Mr. Bad Example at 2:02 AM on September 3, 2018
Glamorama. Its become something of a personal vendetta too. On the London Tube before eReaders people were reading whatever Borders was trying to shift en masse - like "this week we're all reading Captain Corelli's Mandolin, next week; The Da Vinci Code!" and during Glamorama week I not only threw my own copy down in disgust I interrupted people reading it on the Tube and explained that it wasn't going to get better, they were fooling themselves, in fact it was only going to get worse and they would feel horrible for finishing it. How bad was it? So bad that I was breaking one of the cardinal rules of the Tube during rush hour and *talking* to strangers.
Now I find copies in second hand bookstores and buy them up so other people can't.
posted by Molesome at 2:05 AM on September 3, 2018 [5 favorites]
Now I find copies in second hand bookstores and buy them up so other people can't.
posted by Molesome at 2:05 AM on September 3, 2018 [5 favorites]
American Psycho, I did manage to finish it but I dumped my copy in the neighbour's dustbin so the dustmen didn't think I read that sort of book.
posted by epo at 2:10 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by epo at 2:10 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I didn't actually throw it, because I was visiting my parents at the time and smashing their shit wouldn't make for smooth family relations, but I did drop The Alchemist on the floor in disgust when I got to the end. What an absolute stinking pile of drivel. Also, once we needed some scrap paper to start a fire with, and whaddya know there's a copy of Firestarter just hanging around entertaining nobody. That was pretty satisfying.
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 2:11 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 2:11 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
I used to throw books professionally.
I mean, it wasn't a required part of my job, but it ended up being my de facto filing system. I was the submissions editor for a publishing company, during the days when electronic submissions were still a rarity, and books ended up in categories based on how far I flung them in anger. Good books --> carefully placed on the end table next to the couch. Meh books -- casually tossed about midway across the room. The worst of the worst --> hurled against the opposite wall.
I know that sounds cruel, but you didn't have to read "I'm Hungry", the Irish potato famine musical.
posted by kyrademon at 2:36 AM on September 3, 2018 [33 favorites]
I mean, it wasn't a required part of my job, but it ended up being my de facto filing system. I was the submissions editor for a publishing company, during the days when electronic submissions were still a rarity, and books ended up in categories based on how far I flung them in anger. Good books --> carefully placed on the end table next to the couch. Meh books -- casually tossed about midway across the room. The worst of the worst --> hurled against the opposite wall.
I know that sounds cruel, but you didn't have to read "I'm Hungry", the Irish potato famine musical.
posted by kyrademon at 2:36 AM on September 3, 2018 [33 favorites]
Just recently, A Piece of Cake, which is a book for preschoolers about how Mummy fucking Elephant is too fat and needs to go on a diet. Fuuuuccckkk that noise.
posted by threetwentytwo at 2:51 AM on September 3, 2018 [5 favorites]
posted by threetwentytwo at 2:51 AM on September 3, 2018 [5 favorites]
Can't remember it's name, but it was early on in my adult battle with depression and anxiety, and it was a book about dealing with depression from a "Christian" perspective. It was only a few pages in and I recall the book encouraged me to focus on what lesson God was trying to teach me through this "challenging season". Yeah, no thanks.
posted by parm at 4:25 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by parm at 4:25 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I hurled Tess of the d’Urbervilles and Jude the Obscure right across the room, and haven’t bothered with Thomas Hardy since. You can’t say I didn’t try.
Omg, fuck Thomas Hardy forever. Tess is also the only book I've physically thrown I've hated it so much and I've read Of Grammatology. I started Jude the Obscure to give him a second chance, got around twenty pages in, and knew this was just Who Hardy Was. If I had to choose between dating a dude who loved Kerouac and one who loved Hardy, I would pick the former. Fuck, if it I'd take the Palahniuk fan.
posted by dame at 5:02 AM on September 3, 2018 [7 favorites]
Omg, fuck Thomas Hardy forever. Tess is also the only book I've physically thrown I've hated it so much and I've read Of Grammatology. I started Jude the Obscure to give him a second chance, got around twenty pages in, and knew this was just Who Hardy Was. If I had to choose between dating a dude who loved Kerouac and one who loved Hardy, I would pick the former. Fuck, if it I'd take the Palahniuk fan.
posted by dame at 5:02 AM on September 3, 2018 [7 favorites]
I did not throw, but I did delete with great assertiveness, a copy of Joyce Carol Oates The Accursed off of my Kindle. Then I raged because I did not have a physical copy to launch across the room as well and had to talk myself out of buying a second hand copy just so I could throw it.
Omg, fuck Thomas Hardy forever.
Yesssssss.
posted by theBigRedKittyPurrs at 5:19 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
Omg, fuck Thomas Hardy forever.
Yesssssss.
posted by theBigRedKittyPurrs at 5:19 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I Will Fear No Evil by Heinlein. Ugh.
posted by elsietheeel at 5:37 AM on September 3, 2018
posted by elsietheeel at 5:37 AM on September 3, 2018
American Psycho, when I was in my sophomore year of college. I remember it with total clarity: the house we lived in, where I was sitting, the feel of the book in my hands, the weather outside.
Until that point I’d held, with a nearly religious fervor, that all books, regardless of whether or not I liked them, had something worthwhile in them, or something they could teach me.
After that point? Not so much. Except for maybe teaching me that even the most degraded, misogynist sexualized gore could be turned into The Next Big Thing if you were a white guy with the right background.
Still the only book I’ve ever directly experienced where I spontaneously thought “this book should be reviled, banned, and wiped from the face of the earth, the ground salted after it”.
Thinking that, that a book should be banned, was such a horrifying experience that it’s stuck with me for 27 years.
posted by scrump at 5:39 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
Until that point I’d held, with a nearly religious fervor, that all books, regardless of whether or not I liked them, had something worthwhile in them, or something they could teach me.
After that point? Not so much. Except for maybe teaching me that even the most degraded, misogynist sexualized gore could be turned into The Next Big Thing if you were a white guy with the right background.
Still the only book I’ve ever directly experienced where I spontaneously thought “this book should be reviled, banned, and wiped from the face of the earth, the ground salted after it”.
Thinking that, that a book should be banned, was such a horrifying experience that it’s stuck with me for 27 years.
posted by scrump at 5:39 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
I liked The DaVinci Code and, for that matter, pretty much all his books. I like Imajica too, but it’s been a while since I last read it and from what I recall, it would definitely not have aged well.
posted by Autumnheart at 5:43 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by Autumnheart at 5:43 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
I borrowed The Fountainhead from a college acquaintance/crush, somehow read through the whole thing, and was physically unable to return it. What could I possibly say to him? And even more importantly how could I live with myself releasing it back into the world so someone else would read it? I burned it.
posted by sacchan at 5:44 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by sacchan at 5:44 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
you didn't have to read "I'm Hungry", the Irish potato famine musical.
You say "Tomato" and I say "To-MAH-to"
You say "Potato" and I say "Where's the fecking potato? I'm hungry"
I see the problem.
posted by dannyboybell at 5:47 AM on September 3, 2018 [7 favorites]
You say "Tomato" and I say "To-MAH-to"
You say "Potato" and I say "Where's the fecking potato? I'm hungry"
I see the problem.
posted by dannyboybell at 5:47 AM on September 3, 2018 [7 favorites]
I was lying on a friend’s couch and picked up a copy of The Blind Knight by Gail van Asten. About 3 paragraphs in, my arms gave a convulsive jerk and tossed the book away. As I bemusedly watched it sail across the room, I realized that the writing was terrible. I like to think my subconscious realized this first and took emergency measures to protect my brain.
I also, when financially precarious, offered to pay a friend not to read Heinlein’s Number of the Beast. She refused my offer, because she took pride in finishing books. Later, she admitted that she had made a terrible mistake.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:51 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I also, when financially precarious, offered to pay a friend not to read Heinlein’s Number of the Beast. She refused my offer, because she took pride in finishing books. Later, she admitted that she had made a terrible mistake.
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:51 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
The Tale of Genji.
A single beautiful tear slides down my cheek. Next, someone is going to bring up Á la Recherche du Temps Perdu, aren’t you?
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:59 AM on September 3, 2018 [14 favorites]
A single beautiful tear slides down my cheek. Next, someone is going to bring up Á la Recherche du Temps Perdu, aren’t you?
posted by GenjiandProust at 5:59 AM on September 3, 2018 [14 favorites]
I saw A Secret History recommended over and over for years, always in relation to books I loved. It became so clear that I was going to adore it that I actually began to save it, for a time when I really needed a Pillar Book - those books that, once read, become a foundational part of you in a very real way.
Not only did I not love it, I loathed every goddamn minute that I grimly forced my way through it. I hated just about everything about it. I threw that goddamn thing from my living room into the kitchen, because that's where trash goes.
posted by pseudonymph at 6:23 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
Not only did I not love it, I loathed every goddamn minute that I grimly forced my way through it. I hated just about everything about it. I threw that goddamn thing from my living room into the kitchen, because that's where trash goes.
posted by pseudonymph at 6:23 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
The ones I definitely remember throwing:
Purity--Jonathan Franzen
Chronic City--Jonathan Lethem
All The Light We Cannot See--Anthony Doerr
I Am Charlotte Simmons--Tom Wolfe
The Bone Clocks--David Mitchell
Fates and Furies-Lauren Groff
A Little Life--Hanya Yanigahara
And seriously, I'm just going to say Purity by Jonathan Franzen again, because I actually yelled at the book and told it to go fuck off forever after throwing and kicking it. I actually owned the copy (gift), but I left it in a free library with a "You Should Not Read This Piece of Shit" note on it.
posted by thivaia at 6:24 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Purity--Jonathan Franzen
Chronic City--Jonathan Lethem
All The Light We Cannot See--Anthony Doerr
I Am Charlotte Simmons--Tom Wolfe
The Bone Clocks--David Mitchell
Fates and Furies-Lauren Groff
A Little Life--Hanya Yanigahara
And seriously, I'm just going to say Purity by Jonathan Franzen again, because I actually yelled at the book and told it to go fuck off forever after throwing and kicking it. I actually owned the copy (gift), but I left it in a free library with a "You Should Not Read This Piece of Shit" note on it.
posted by thivaia at 6:24 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
(Sorry if you love it! There's at least one book I adore mentioned in this thread so if it helps, I too am feeling the 'BUT SO GREAT?! I LOVE?!' sting.)
posted by pseudonymph at 6:24 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
posted by pseudonymph at 6:24 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
House of Leaves. 500 pages of someone’s junk mail to disguise the fact that nothing actually happens.
posted by Autumnheart at 6:31 AM on September 3, 2018 [7 favorites]
posted by Autumnheart at 6:31 AM on September 3, 2018 [7 favorites]
1. Because It Is Bitter, and Because It Is My Heart by Joyce Carol Oates, read for a book club, and referred to forever more as "that fucking book." I should have known then it was not the book club for me.
2. The Time Traveler's Wife, read because the guy I was dating at the time said it was so wonderful and not the sexist wankery it actually is. I should have known then he was not the guy for me.
I'm seeing a theme here, a theme fit for a book so annoying I could throw it across the room.
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 6:31 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
2. The Time Traveler's Wife, read because the guy I was dating at the time said it was so wonderful and not the sexist wankery it actually is. I should have known then he was not the guy for me.
I'm seeing a theme here, a theme fit for a book so annoying I could throw it across the room.
posted by Orange Dinosaur Slide at 6:31 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I loved Catch 22 so much, so when Something Happened came out I rushed to buy it. A few chapters in it was apparent that Nothing Happened and so I threw it. I was young but I might do the same thing today, though I now forgive Heller for not being able to write an even better book.
posted by Hobgoblin at 6:35 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Hobgoblin at 6:35 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I suddenly have the urge to go back and find everyone ever I told that I liked Atlas Shrugged in freshman year of college and assure them that I did eventually come to my senses in a big way.
Back on the subject: Red Rising by Pierce Brown. I think I got a third of the way through before I tossed it and spent the rest of my evening read negative reviews of it. I don't remember who recommended that sexist piece of trash to me, but I'm incensed that I read any of it, and that it's so well reviewed on Goodreads.
Also the second Discovery of Witches book, at the very end. I know who recommended that to me, and I'm still pissed.
posted by bridgebury at 6:54 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
Back on the subject: Red Rising by Pierce Brown. I think I got a third of the way through before I tossed it and spent the rest of my evening read negative reviews of it. I don't remember who recommended that sexist piece of trash to me, but I'm incensed that I read any of it, and that it's so well reviewed on Goodreads.
Also the second Discovery of Witches book, at the very end. I know who recommended that to me, and I'm still pissed.
posted by bridgebury at 6:54 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
At least nineteen books I quite like have so far been mentioned in this thread. But hey, it takes all kinds. I'm not going to apologize for enjoying The Princess Bride, but I can understand the objection raised. And the same for the others.
posted by kyrademon at 7:05 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by kyrademon at 7:05 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
> "Also the second Discovery of Witches book, at the very end."
Oh man, I hated those SO MUCH. My spouse made me read and review the second book because she thought my review of the first was so hilariously angry. I haven't been convinced to read the third yet.
posted by kyrademon at 7:05 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
Oh man, I hated those SO MUCH. My spouse made me read and review the second book because she thought my review of the first was so hilariously angry. I haven't been convinced to read the third yet.
posted by kyrademon at 7:05 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
Ariel, by Steven Boyett.
posted by xedrik at 7:12 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by xedrik at 7:12 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
> "Oh man, I hated those SO MUCH. My spouse made me read and review the second book because she thought my review of the first was so hilariously angry. I haven't been convinced to read the third yet."
I have a group of friends who are OBSESSED with the series to the point where a couple of them have started a podcast going through the books chapter by chapter. I don't understand it at all, but have so far restrained myself to posting a scathing review and going quiet every time the books come up in conversation.
But, just, seriously. The first is not good, and the second gets SO baby-focused and then (spoiler) kills off half of the only couple not popping out babies to save the pregnant lady because apparently if you're not having kids it's your job to sacrifice yourself to save those who are? Because your life isn't as important? It's absolute shit.
posted by bridgebury at 7:14 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
I have a group of friends who are OBSESSED with the series to the point where a couple of them have started a podcast going through the books chapter by chapter. I don't understand it at all, but have so far restrained myself to posting a scathing review and going quiet every time the books come up in conversation.
But, just, seriously. The first is not good, and the second gets SO baby-focused and then (spoiler) kills off half of the only couple not popping out babies to save the pregnant lady because apparently if you're not having kids it's your job to sacrifice yourself to save those who are? Because your life isn't as important? It's absolute shit.
posted by bridgebury at 7:14 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
I got the audiobook of Discovery of Witches because it seemed to be about a bunch of things I enjoy. However, it turned out that those things were done very badly and wrapped around a bunch of stuff I don’t enjoy, like a cruel present. It’s hard to throw an audiobook without smashing my phone, which makes it all worse.
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:17 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by GenjiandProust at 7:17 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
I am here for all the Bret Easton Ellis hate.
For Glamorama I devised a particular punishment for books that didn't deserve to exist: Placement under a window that had a very less than zero chance of getting rained on. All that volume could do was look up at the sky and despair as the clouds rolled in and soaked it into oblivion.
posted by Cold Lurkey at 7:17 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
For Glamorama I devised a particular punishment for books that didn't deserve to exist: Placement under a window that had a very less than zero chance of getting rained on. All that volume could do was look up at the sky and despair as the clouds rolled in and soaked it into oblivion.
posted by Cold Lurkey at 7:17 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
The last time I bought a book from Barnes and Noble, it was “Judaism: A Way of Being,” by David Gelernter. I had just been on an LGBT birthright trip, and was interested in exploring my Jewish heritage further. I was reading this book, and I had come to some whole entire paragraph about the sanctity of marriage being specifically between one man and one woman, and I was so furious that I had been dumb enough to buy such an innocuous seeming book by such a poisonous author that I ripped the book in half and threw it across the room. I later looked the guy up on Wikipedia and my feelings were then further calcified after seeing some of the names of the other books that this author was famous for writing.
I will exclusively be using the internet or independent bookstores to buy my books after having that experience, thank you very much.
posted by oceanjesse at 7:22 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I will exclusively be using the internet or independent bookstores to buy my books after having that experience, thank you very much.
posted by oceanjesse at 7:22 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
A couple for me out of the YA genre:
posted by Rash at 7:33 AM on September 3, 2018
- House of Stairs by William Sleator
- The Giver by Lois Lowry
posted by Rash at 7:33 AM on September 3, 2018
I mostly read ebooks now, so I delete with extreme prejudice but the last physical book I chucked across a room was Atomised by Michel Houellebecq.
posted by halcyonday at 7:45 AM on September 3, 2018
posted by halcyonday at 7:45 AM on September 3, 2018
Me:
>Great Expectations (I would have thrown it if it wasn't part of a larger, school-assigned textbook)
>Memnoch the Devil
>Atonement
misterussell:
>Gift of the Magi ("couldn't they just ...talk to each other?")
>Five People You Meet in Heaven, thoughtfully given to him after his father died.
posted by kimberussell at 7:47 AM on September 3, 2018
>Great Expectations (I would have thrown it if it wasn't part of a larger, school-assigned textbook)
>Memnoch the Devil
>Atonement
misterussell:
>Gift of the Magi ("couldn't they just ...talk to each other?")
>Five People You Meet in Heaven, thoughtfully given to him after his father died.
posted by kimberussell at 7:47 AM on September 3, 2018
A Little Life--Hanya Yanigahara
The worst thing about that turd of a book was that I was kind of riveted while I was reading it because, I have to admit, I was curious in a totally gross way about what was up next in the parade of the ludicrous. Would one of the characters have his leg gnawed off by a hippo? Or maybe the same character would have his leg gnawed off by a hippo and then immediately win the Nobel Prize for economics? And then when I was finished I looked up and said “WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?!?” I didn’t throw it anywhere but I slammed it down on my husband’s desk and insisted that he remove it from my personal space.
posted by holborne at 7:50 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
The worst thing about that turd of a book was that I was kind of riveted while I was reading it because, I have to admit, I was curious in a totally gross way about what was up next in the parade of the ludicrous. Would one of the characters have his leg gnawed off by a hippo? Or maybe the same character would have his leg gnawed off by a hippo and then immediately win the Nobel Prize for economics? And then when I was finished I looked up and said “WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK?!?” I didn’t throw it anywhere but I slammed it down on my husband’s desk and insisted that he remove it from my personal space.
posted by holborne at 7:50 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
I threw The Tommyknockers after half way, and banned Mr. King from my reading list for about 15 years. I didn't relent until he released 11/22/63, which I quite enjoyed, after which I binge listened to The Dark Tower (about 145 hours....).
However, I've also hate read a bunch of books, I think maybe most notably Blackout by Connie Willis in recent years. A few others too, but I hated that one so much that I'm pretty sure my wife got tired of me ranting about it. It still pisses me off. The characters were just so fucking dumb, but were supposed to be scientists etc. Ok, if I don't stop now I'll go off again. Alas, that book was an e-book. Kindle needs a "Throw this book" button.
I've thrown a bunch others, but have forgotten them. They weren't good enough to hate.
posted by Bovine Love at 7:56 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
However, I've also hate read a bunch of books, I think maybe most notably Blackout by Connie Willis in recent years. A few others too, but I hated that one so much that I'm pretty sure my wife got tired of me ranting about it. It still pisses me off. The characters were just so fucking dumb, but were supposed to be scientists etc. Ok, if I don't stop now I'll go off again. Alas, that book was an e-book. Kindle needs a "Throw this book" button.
I've thrown a bunch others, but have forgotten them. They weren't good enough to hate.
posted by Bovine Love at 7:56 AM on September 3, 2018 [4 favorites]
Perpetual War for Perpetual Peace by Gore Vidal. A pile of conspiracy-theory horse shit.
posted by Optamystic at 8:13 AM on September 3, 2018
posted by Optamystic at 8:13 AM on September 3, 2018
For Glamorama I devised a particular punishment for books that didn't deserve to exist: Placement under a window that had a very less than zero chance of getting rained on.
I see what you did, there. Excellent.
posted by Optamystic at 8:17 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I see what you did, there. Excellent.
posted by Optamystic at 8:17 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
Oh, I love hating Gift of the Magi. Every time someone cites it in earnest, I just collapse laughing. Also every time I walk past that O. Henry plaque on Irving Place, I imagine him in that bar thinking he is so wise, and I feel the delight of history. That piece of shit.
posted by dame at 8:22 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by dame at 8:22 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Or maybe the same character would have his leg gnawed off by a hippo and then immediately win the Nobel Prize for economics?
While composing and performing an aria, while making a batttenberg cake with one arm after the other rots off mid baking, suffering in perfect sublime beauty as literal God appears in corporeal form to nurse him back to health, pay off his law school debt and clear things up with the co-op board.
posted by thivaia at 8:27 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
While composing and performing an aria, while making a batttenberg cake with one arm after the other rots off mid baking, suffering in perfect sublime beauty as literal God appears in corporeal form to nurse him back to health, pay off his law school debt and clear things up with the co-op board.
posted by thivaia at 8:27 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I guess I am not very violent. When I read "Atlas Shrugged", I was possessed by a deep hatred that was only quenched by me taking notes as I read it and devising a multiple choice quiz. I recently read "Inherent Vice" and was deeply irritated, but not enough to devise a quiz.
The first book to deeply disappoint me was the last volume of "The Lion, Witch and the Wardrobe" series by C.S. Lewis. I know you will disbelieve this, but I was raised an atheist, so it was only with the last volume that I realized the whole thing was a Christian Allegory. I never trusted authors entirely again, so I guess after that I never was disappointed enough to hurl a book.
The "Da vinci Code"? I bought it when I had to spend the day waiting for the Futon delivery truck to arrive and I was expecting a juicy good read. Boy, was that a long day.
posted by acrasis at 8:39 AM on September 3, 2018 [7 favorites]
The first book to deeply disappoint me was the last volume of "The Lion, Witch and the Wardrobe" series by C.S. Lewis. I know you will disbelieve this, but I was raised an atheist, so it was only with the last volume that I realized the whole thing was a Christian Allegory. I never trusted authors entirely again, so I guess after that I never was disappointed enough to hurl a book.
The "Da vinci Code"? I bought it when I had to spend the day waiting for the Futon delivery truck to arrive and I was expecting a juicy good read. Boy, was that a long day.
posted by acrasis at 8:39 AM on September 3, 2018 [7 favorites]
There was a point when personal blogs were officially a Thing that publishers decided to mail copies of new books to like thirty bloggers at once and have them all write reviews, publishing one every couple days, in the hopes that this would drive sales.
I participated in exactly one of these, for Hothouse Flower and the Nine Plants of Desire (Margot Berwin), hated every second of the book, and would have stopped well before the ending had I not made a commitment to review it. The review was . . . unkind. Though my readers also seemed to think it was one of the best posts I've ever produced for the blog, so overall I guess the experience was kind of a wash.
(The review says that I didn't actually throw the book, though I have a fairly specific memory of doing so, and definitely wanted to. It may be that waited to do so until the review was completed, for the closure.)
posted by Spathe Cadet at 8:43 AM on September 3, 2018
I participated in exactly one of these, for Hothouse Flower and the Nine Plants of Desire (Margot Berwin), hated every second of the book, and would have stopped well before the ending had I not made a commitment to review it. The review was . . . unkind. Though my readers also seemed to think it was one of the best posts I've ever produced for the blog, so overall I guess the experience was kind of a wash.
(The review says that I didn't actually throw the book, though I have a fairly specific memory of doing so, and definitely wanted to. It may be that waited to do so until the review was completed, for the closure.)
posted by Spathe Cadet at 8:43 AM on September 3, 2018
The Celestine fucking Prophecy
someone recommended that to me in earnest seriousness, did not mention it was a creepy cult recruiting book, and then wanted to Talk About It afterwards and i have not been able to respect her since. i had thought perhaps it was a gloriously crafted long con of a diss, like the time i told my cousin he would probably enjoy TBBT more if he was smarter, but no, she was serious and it was painful.
posted by poffin boffin at 8:54 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
someone recommended that to me in earnest seriousness, did not mention it was a creepy cult recruiting book, and then wanted to Talk About It afterwards and i have not been able to respect her since. i had thought perhaps it was a gloriously crafted long con of a diss, like the time i told my cousin he would probably enjoy TBBT more if he was smarter, but no, she was serious and it was painful.
posted by poffin boffin at 8:54 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
acrasis: I know you will disbelieve this, but I was raised an atheist, so it was only with the last volume that I realized the whole thing was a Christian Allegory.
Oh, I believe you entirely. I grew up in a place where religion just...wasn't really a substantial part of the societal fabric. More in the vein of 'some people are into it, they're a bit eccentric but if they're nice, it's fine?'
And like you, me and my friends who read it as kids had no idea until the end (or in the case of my friend Catherine, an aunt pointing it out) that those were religious allegories. It was an actual shock.
posted by pseudonymph at 8:55 AM on September 3, 2018 [9 favorites]
Oh, I believe you entirely. I grew up in a place where religion just...wasn't really a substantial part of the societal fabric. More in the vein of 'some people are into it, they're a bit eccentric but if they're nice, it's fine?'
And like you, me and my friends who read it as kids had no idea until the end (or in the case of my friend Catherine, an aunt pointing it out) that those were religious allegories. It was an actual shock.
posted by pseudonymph at 8:55 AM on September 3, 2018 [9 favorites]
Gödel, Escher, Bach: an Eternal Golden Braid
During one of the dialogues I launched it against my hotel room wall in Utrecht. Patronising twaddle.
Even though it was the only book I had with me on the trip I didn't return to it. The hotel spa guide was marginally more profound and certainly less derivative.
posted by AillilUpATree at 9:10 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
During one of the dialogues I launched it against my hotel room wall in Utrecht. Patronising twaddle.
Even though it was the only book I had with me on the trip I didn't return to it. The hotel spa guide was marginally more profound and certainly less derivative.
posted by AillilUpATree at 9:10 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I didn’t get a good read of Tommyknockers until I recently listened to the audiobook (which I was only doing because it was available at the library and I was waiting for my Audible credits to replenish). The latter half of the book and all the characters blithely being transformed into genius-inventor telepathic aliens was honestly pretty great. But in order to get there, you had to get past the utterly obnoxious, way-too-long scene of Drunk Writer Whatshisnuts (Gard) going on a bender, being a complete travesty at a dinner party, and then hitchhiking his rock-bottom hobo ass up to Maine in time for the action to take off. I don’t enjoy secondhand experience/cringing at someone else’s behavior AT ALL, in books or movies, and that whole chapter certainly makes it clear that Gard’s a fucking asshole with a couple redeeming qualities, but Jesus Christ.
Maybe one day King will re-edit that book, summarize that whole section as “Gard went on a poetry tour and disappeared into a week-long bender, waking up in the back of a passenger van driven by a bunch of Dead fans” and give the rest of the book a decent shot at being read.
posted by Autumnheart at 9:16 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Maybe one day King will re-edit that book, summarize that whole section as “Gard went on a poetry tour and disappeared into a week-long bender, waking up in the back of a passenger van driven by a bunch of Dead fans” and give the rest of the book a decent shot at being read.
posted by Autumnheart at 9:16 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Yeah, there have been at least 5 books in this thread I have *loved* and now I can’t ever reread them for fear my older self will see whatever y’all did.
posted by greermahoney at 9:26 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by greermahoney at 9:26 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
(Secondhand embarrassment, I mean)
posted by Autumnheart at 9:26 AM on September 3, 2018
posted by Autumnheart at 9:26 AM on September 3, 2018
I secretly tossed The Alchemist. Then I picked it up, pretended to finish it, and hid it behind and under the worst books on my shelves. It was a gift and I didn't want to appear ungrateful. (I was ungrateful but I didn't want to appear ungrateful. People should not give me books. I almost never like them.)
But I try not to scorn other people for liking throwable crap. I like some throwable crap. So do you.
posted by pracowity at 9:44 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
But I try not to scorn other people for liking throwable crap. I like some throwable crap. So do you.
posted by pracowity at 9:44 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I am here for all the Bret Easton Ellis hate.
Don't know much about Glamorama. But between American Psycho (which I also haven't read but know about) and certain scenes from Less Than Zero (which I did unfortunately read), one has to wonder if Ellis might have some ...issues to work out.
posted by gtrwolf at 9:46 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Don't know much about Glamorama. But between American Psycho (which I also haven't read but know about) and certain scenes from Less Than Zero (which I did unfortunately read), one has to wonder if Ellis might have some ...issues to work out.
posted by gtrwolf at 9:46 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I was once reading an un-remarkable but enjoyable period romance sort of book, and then, ON THE LAST PAGE, the guy dies for no reason in a boat accident. No reason at all. I was so angry I threw the book, retrieved it, and then tore the last page out so it would no longer have such a stupid ending.
Actually, I also threw a book about somebody getting lost in the wilderness, nearly starving, surviving, eventually returning home and finding a wife and then BAM last three pages they all fall through the ice and die.
Basically I don't like books where people die at the end for no particular narrative reason. It is very, very unsatisfying.
posted by stillnocturnal at 9:51 AM on September 3, 2018 [6 favorites]
Actually, I also threw a book about somebody getting lost in the wilderness, nearly starving, surviving, eventually returning home and finding a wife and then BAM last three pages they all fall through the ice and die.
Basically I don't like books where people die at the end for no particular narrative reason. It is very, very unsatisfying.
posted by stillnocturnal at 9:51 AM on September 3, 2018 [6 favorites]
(Also, I'm not dissing anyone who actually liked The Da Vinci Code, was just musing considering how many times it was brought up in the previous thread. Probably should have emphasized "anyone" instead of "liked".).
posted by gtrwolf at 9:54 AM on September 3, 2018
posted by gtrwolf at 9:54 AM on September 3, 2018
Angels and Demons for mischaracterizing atheists, again. He does that a lot. And how is Joseph Conrad not on here anywhere that I can find? Heart of Darkness is so foul.
posted by debgpi at 10:06 AM on September 3, 2018
posted by debgpi at 10:06 AM on September 3, 2018
Basically I don't like books where people die at the end for no particular narrative reason. It is very, very unsatisfying.
Ditto that and when movies throw in a "downbeat" ending seemingly for "realism", shock value, or apparently just for the heck of it instead of said ending actually fitting the narrative.
posted by gtrwolf at 10:09 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
Ditto that and when movies throw in a "downbeat" ending seemingly for "realism", shock value, or apparently just for the heck of it instead of said ending actually fitting the narrative.
posted by gtrwolf at 10:09 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I read Lord of the Flies at 11. Got as far as Simon's death scene and flung the book away in horrified tears. My mum, who'd given me the book, says she thought it was like a Boys Own adventure thing "A bit like Swiss Family Robinson"...
posted by rhamphorhynchus at 10:41 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by rhamphorhynchus at 10:41 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I've...never done this, but I did attend Reed College for two years and they had an annual "Iliad Toss" to celebrate completion of HUM 110. Wonder if this is still a thing.
posted by The Ardship of Cambry at 10:59 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by The Ardship of Cambry at 10:59 AM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
My Grade 13 finite textbook. Had to pay to replace it!
posted by The Card Cheat at 11:00 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by The Card Cheat at 11:00 AM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I listened to the audiobook of the novel We Were Liars on my daily commute a couple of years ago when it was a hot title. I got to the end and vividly remember thinking that if I had been reading the physical book I would have thrown it out my car window.
Man, I HATED the ending of that book!
posted by bookmammal at 11:13 AM on September 3, 2018
Man, I HATED the ending of that book!
posted by bookmammal at 11:13 AM on September 3, 2018
1984. I didn't dislike it but the ending was so distressing that I threw it across the room, glared at it, then walked over and threw it back the other way again.
posted by emeiji at 11:30 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by emeiji at 11:30 AM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
also i would like to take piers anthony's entire oeuvre and launch it into the sun whilst burning him in effigy
posted by poffin boffin at 11:37 AM on September 3, 2018 [16 favorites]
posted by poffin boffin at 11:37 AM on September 3, 2018 [16 favorites]
I have not thrown one across a room. But I have drowned Dan Brown in my bathtub.
posted by flabdablet at 12:04 PM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by flabdablet at 12:04 PM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
Book 6 of The Wheel of Time series was the first book that angered me enough to throw at the wall. I felt vindicated when Robert Jordan died rather than finish that fucking series and all of its goddamned braid-tugging and eyebrow-arching bullshit characterization. Jesus fuck I hate that series. (Though the existence of Terry Goodkind makes me think of the WoT series fondly, sort of like being nostalgic about a snakebite while being eaten by badgers.)
posted by malthusan at 12:06 PM on September 3, 2018 [8 favorites]
posted by malthusan at 12:06 PM on September 3, 2018 [8 favorites]
I'm not dissing anyone who actually liked The Da Vinci Code
I am.
What the hell is wrong with these people?
posted by flabdablet at 12:06 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I am.
What the hell is wrong with these people?
posted by flabdablet at 12:06 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
Also: I disagree with people hating on Jonathan Strange but am perversely impressed by the upper body strength it would take to throw said tome, especially the hardback edition.
posted by The Ardship of Cambry at 12:48 PM on September 3, 2018 [8 favorites]
posted by The Ardship of Cambry at 12:48 PM on September 3, 2018 [8 favorites]
Also: I disagree with people hating on Jonathan Strange but am perversely impressed by the upper body strength it would take to throw said tome, especially the hardback edition.
As they say, where there's a will.....
posted by gtrwolf at 1:06 PM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
As they say, where there's a will.....
posted by gtrwolf at 1:06 PM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
American Psycho... Until that point I’d held, with a nearly religious fervor, that all books, regardless of whether or not I liked them, had something worthwhile in them
Why do you hate Phil Collins?
posted by rokusan at 1:11 PM on September 3, 2018
Why do you hate Phil Collins?
posted by rokusan at 1:11 PM on September 3, 2018
the existence of Terry Goodkind makes me think of the WoT series fondly, sort of like being nostalgic about a snakebite while being eaten by badgers.
Oh god, this. I wonder what Ayn Rand would have thought of Goodkind's weird plagiaristic fanboyishness. 🙄
posted by Secret Sparrow at 1:41 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
Oh god, this. I wonder what Ayn Rand would have thought of Goodkind's weird plagiaristic fanboyishness. 🙄
posted by Secret Sparrow at 1:41 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
The Summer Tree
I think I read this because of a metafilter thread and even though I can't remember your name, I hate you, person who recommended this.
posted by pickinganameismuchharderthanihadanticipated at 2:00 PM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I think I read this because of a metafilter thread and even though I can't remember your name, I hate you, person who recommended this.
posted by pickinganameismuchharderthanihadanticipated at 2:00 PM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
“How To Lose Friends And Alienate People” by that toff
I actually found this book at a yard sale or something and bought it on a whim.. While I did not throw it, i just... stopped reading it because yeah, what a doofus.
posted by some loser at 2:06 PM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I actually found this book at a yard sale or something and bought it on a whim.. While I did not throw it, i just... stopped reading it because yeah, what a doofus.
posted by some loser at 2:06 PM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
Count me in on Team Game of Thrones. After The Red Wedding that book spent two weeks in a lonely corner.
posted by Cyrano at 2:34 PM on September 3, 2018
posted by Cyrano at 2:34 PM on September 3, 2018
JT Leroy, The Heart Is Deceitful Above All Things was, despite all the praise it was getting at the time, such nauseatingly gratuitous spew that I was convinced it was a work of total fiction slapped together with the deliberate intent of making the reader vomit, like I could practically see the author smirking at me, page after page, looking at me like "can you handle this? how about THIS?" and I was furious because no, I absolutely could not handle it and got about halfway through before throwing it violently at the wall, picking it up and then dropping it down my building's garbage chute. That the whole persona of the author turned out to be pure invention made me feel like filing a suit against the publisher for punitive damages.
posted by Aya Hirano on the Astral Plane at 2:36 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by Aya Hirano on the Astral Plane at 2:36 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I've come to feel that way about a couple of Alan Moore's latest works. (Specifically, Providence and Crossed: 100.) I haven't written him off completely, but the only thing forthcoming from him that I'm still interested in is The Moon and Serpent Bumper Book of Magic, if he ever even finishes it.
posted by Halloween Jack at 3:38 PM on September 3, 2018
posted by Halloween Jack at 3:38 PM on September 3, 2018
I can relate to many of these tosses. There are a few selections that might be worth another look if you are in the right mood. I don't toss because I'm jaded from much of the dreck from my childhood. (Okay, I came really close with Celestine!) The only time that I threw something in a critic rage context was at a screen playing the second Steve Jobs movie because of egregious miscasting and script mushing. Sorry for the derail.
posted by ovvl at 4:40 PM on September 3, 2018
posted by ovvl at 4:40 PM on September 3, 2018
Closer by Dennis Cooper. I was so mad about the manual disembowelment that I wanted to make papier-mâché with the book.
posted by pxe2000 at 5:13 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by pxe2000 at 5:13 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
Ohhhhhh, I forgot about this one. C. S. Lewis, "Mere Christianity". Hooo boy. What a sanctimonious self-congratulatory pile of utterly ignorant shit. Speaking of which, M. Scott Peck, "The Road Less Traveled."
posted by smcameron at 7:15 PM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by smcameron at 7:15 PM on September 3, 2018 [1 favorite]
I think I also put John Kennedy Toole's A confederacy of dunces in the recycle bin. Not that I finished reading it; I tortured myself with 100 pages of it because it was a bookclub book but I loathed it so much that it was either stop reading it or kill myself.
posted by Athanassiel at 7:17 PM on September 3, 2018
posted by Athanassiel at 7:17 PM on September 3, 2018
A philosophical side-note, if you will: If you toss one P. J. O'Rourke book across the room, you are actually tossing all his books, because he keeps on writing the same damn book.
posted by Chitownfats at 8:05 PM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by Chitownfats at 8:05 PM on September 3, 2018 [3 favorites]
Oh, I remembered an adult book-tossing incident. It was a Chinese translation of Albert Camus's The Myth of Sisyphus. I loved the content of the book, but the translation was awful. Absolutely terrible. It was so ignorantly messed up it defied common-sense.
Later I read some chapters from the French edition and it was an easier read.
posted by runcifex at 9:08 PM on September 3, 2018
Later I read some chapters from the French edition and it was an easier read.
posted by runcifex at 9:08 PM on September 3, 2018
Seveneves. I threw it across the room when it became clear Stephenson was essentially on about eugenics. I'd already had enough of tech bros fawning over the bad parts of his books. Basta ya.
posted by gusandrews at 11:13 PM on September 3, 2018 [8 favorites]
posted by gusandrews at 11:13 PM on September 3, 2018 [8 favorites]
I had already burnt my shitty ex's copy of Cryptonomicon.
posted by gusandrews at 11:15 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by gusandrews at 11:15 PM on September 3, 2018 [2 favorites]
I thought I'd buried all memory of the horrors I've launched across a room but mention of Nicholas Sparks reminded me - One Day by David Nicholls deserved far worse than colliding with the wall then lurking in a charity shop. Low-level misogyny and a self-involved male protagonist with a disposable pining cardboard cutout as the female love interest are not what I read romance novels for.
All in Deeply Significant Prose, as well. My god I hated that book.
posted by Otto the Magnificent at 12:48 AM on September 4, 2018
All in Deeply Significant Prose, as well. My god I hated that book.
posted by Otto the Magnificent at 12:48 AM on September 4, 2018
This thread makes me want to preface my book recommendations with an "I've thrown______ , with that in mind, I think you'd like _________"
posted by thivaia at 6:18 AM on September 4, 2018
posted by thivaia at 6:18 AM on September 4, 2018
I threw Orson Scott Card's Xenocide into a canyon once on a golf trip. Not wanting to litter, I climbed down, grabbed it, and threw it back up.
posted by holmesian at 6:35 AM on September 4, 2018 [3 favorites]
posted by holmesian at 6:35 AM on September 4, 2018 [3 favorites]
Man, all my DNFs and one-star reviews on Goodreads are the ones that have kept acquiring likes for half a decade. It kinda bums me out. The one I didn't review, though, was a recent fantasy-western so bad I have blotted its name from my memory. I made it about thirty pages in before I was overcome by the misogyny.
posted by restless_nomad at 7:37 AM on September 4, 2018
posted by restless_nomad at 7:37 AM on September 4, 2018
The Six-Gun Tarot! That was it.
posted by restless_nomad at 7:39 AM on September 4, 2018
posted by restless_nomad at 7:39 AM on September 4, 2018
There are a lot of books I wish I'd thrown across a room but the only one I know I did was The Sound and the Fury because I was reading a sentence so long I couldn't find the end of it.
posted by tangosnail at 12:59 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by tangosnail at 12:59 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
The Woman Upstairs by Claire Messud. Hefted it once for a satisfying clunk, picked it up and lobbed it again. Good lord but I hated that book. One of the few works of art I'd consider an acid test for someone's personality, e.g. if you thought it was great I'd struggle to ever take you seriously.
posted by Gin and Broadband at 2:29 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Gin and Broadband at 2:29 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
A single beautiful tear slides down my cheek. Next, someone is going to bring up Á la Recherche du Temps Perdu, aren’t you?
I've never thrown Proust across the room, but I did glare disapprovingly at the screen when the narrator creeped on Albertine while she was asleep. It was like that scene in End of Evangelion, but with the apocalypse or giant robots in the background.
posted by betweenthebars at 3:04 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
I've never thrown Proust across the room, but I did glare disapprovingly at the screen when the narrator creeped on Albertine while she was asleep. It was like that scene in End of Evangelion, but with the apocalypse or giant robots in the background.
posted by betweenthebars at 3:04 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
An Amanda Quick novel, title unremembered and irrelevant because, based on the other two I read, all her books are identical. I was in a public library reading room and already irritated because identical book, and then I got to the heroine and hero talking about "Miss Austen's" latest novel, Pride and Prejudice. I hurled it. Hard. Across the room.
WHAT PART OF PUBLISHED EVERYTHING ANONYMOUSLY IN HER LIFETIME DID YOU NOT BOTHER TO RESEARCH?
(Not to mention S&S wasn't exactly a bestseller, so her second book was not likely to be first-meeting conversation fodder, but that's second level research fail.)
Yes, I got in trouble with a librarian. I didn't return to that branch for 20 years.
posted by Quasirandom at 3:04 PM on September 4, 2018 [3 favorites]
WHAT PART OF PUBLISHED EVERYTHING ANONYMOUSLY IN HER LIFETIME DID YOU NOT BOTHER TO RESEARCH?
(Not to mention S&S wasn't exactly a bestseller, so her second book was not likely to be first-meeting conversation fodder, but that's second level research fail.)
Yes, I got in trouble with a librarian. I didn't return to that branch for 20 years.
posted by Quasirandom at 3:04 PM on September 4, 2018 [3 favorites]
And I'm pretty sure that Albertine faked her own death. Best response to that situation.
posted by betweenthebars at 3:09 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by betweenthebars at 3:09 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
There seem to be a distinct subset of people who have thrown books not because the book was bad, but because the subject matter was horrific or painful or whatever.
That's always interesting to me.
posted by aspersioncast at 3:48 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
That's always interesting to me.
posted by aspersioncast at 3:48 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
Way back in my younger days, when I got to the end of Stephen King's It. "the supreme evil being is a damn spider?" Man I was pissed. Still kind of am.
posted by jkosmicki at 4:00 PM on September 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by jkosmicki at 4:00 PM on September 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
It was like that scene in End of Evangelion, but with the apocalypse or giant robots in the background.
I feel that either there is a word missing or that you read a different translation than I did....
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:45 PM on September 4, 2018
I feel that either there is a word missing or that you read a different translation than I did....
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:45 PM on September 4, 2018
i came here specifically to see if anybody else had mentioned A Little Life, by Hanya Yanigahara.
it will go down in history as the book i threw across the room, AND the only book to ever give me an anxiety attack (in two separate incidents).
posted by isaacq at 5:10 PM on September 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
it will go down in history as the book i threw across the room, AND the only book to ever give me an anxiety attack (in two separate incidents).
posted by isaacq at 5:10 PM on September 4, 2018 [2 favorites]
He’s watching her sleep with his hand down his pants.
(Sometimes I like to imagine the narrator and Albertine writing to Ask MetaFilter. Obviously it would be a DTMFA pile-on.)
posted by betweenthebars at 5:36 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
(Sometimes I like to imagine the narrator and Albertine writing to Ask MetaFilter. Obviously it would be a DTMFA pile-on.)
posted by betweenthebars at 5:36 PM on September 4, 2018 [1 favorite]
Anne Rice, The Witching Hour, somewhere around the 400th page.
posted by zeusianfog at 10:42 AM on September 5, 2018
posted by zeusianfog at 10:42 AM on September 5, 2018
> It was a library book so I didn't throw it but I remember slamming it shut and announcing loudly "it's the fucking French Revolution with fairies!"
really? qu'est-ce que c'est? I want to rubberneck at it.
It took a couple of days to remember, because I had firmly blocked it from mind, but it was Illusion by Paula Volsky.
This is surely Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell?
No, Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell is set during the Napoleonic Wars, not the French Revolution.
The secret to Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell, I think, is to watch the dramatization first, then read the book. And even then, it requires a definite fondness for archaic writing styles and voluminous (excessive, some would say) footnotes. It's a Vegemite book.
posted by Lexica at 10:59 AM on September 5, 2018 [2 favorites]
really? qu'est-ce que c'est? I want to rubberneck at it.
It took a couple of days to remember, because I had firmly blocked it from mind, but it was Illusion by Paula Volsky.
This is surely Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell?
No, Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell is set during the Napoleonic Wars, not the French Revolution.
The secret to Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell, I think, is to watch the dramatization first, then read the book. And even then, it requires a definite fondness for archaic writing styles and voluminous (excessive, some would say) footnotes. It's a Vegemite book.
posted by Lexica at 10:59 AM on September 5, 2018 [2 favorites]
Ah, the Volsky book. Such a pretty cover, inside quite disappointing.
posted by tavella at 3:11 PM on September 5, 2018
posted by tavella at 3:11 PM on September 5, 2018
Twilight. I love YA fiction, including romances, and enjoy some supernatural and fantasy fiction. I just had a visceral reaction to trying to get through Twilight. I still feel bad that I threw it though, because it was a library book. I also eventually tried to read it again, with vastly lowered expectations, and got through the whole series. It was handy when I was working as a school librarian and as a cultural reference, but that's about all it had going for it.
posted by Margalo Epps at 7:07 PM on September 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by Margalo Epps at 7:07 PM on September 10, 2018 [1 favorite]
"There was no hope for him this time: it was the third stroke."
The above is the first line of James Joyce's 'Dubliners' and it just get worse from there on in.
My English teacher at the time had assigned it as revenge for me persuading the class to vote for Maya Angelou's 'I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings' as the next book from the syllabus list. "Enough modern rubbish by women it's time for some real literature!" Such an evil weasel of a man.
I don't think I've ever hated an assigned reading text as much as I hated - and still hate James Joyce's Dubliners.
I had a cushion next to my desk on the floor, precisely so I could hurl it violently to the floor and not destroy the book.
It is the only text from my entire academic career that I never kept. That same year we read Truman Capote's In Cold Blood.
posted by Faintdreams at 7:00 AM on September 11, 2018
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We know, you hate Twitter. You hate the format. You hate that this posts backwards. Feel free to move along to a different story.
posted by Etrigan at 6:35 PM on September 2, 2018 [22 favorites]