An ill wind that no one blows good
January 10, 2019 2:25 PM   Subscribe

In 2010, musicologists and artisans from Oxford's Bate Collection of Musical Instruments teamed up and worked for months to faithfully recreate ten instruments depicted in Hieronymus Bosch's famous triptych, The Garden of Earthly Delights. The results were less than successful (though sadly, no audio or video exists), and since I know you're all wondering: it is not possible to play the flute with your bottom. posted by duffell (21 comments total) 14 users marked this as a favorite
 
Crap! All those links and I forgot the one that includes a picture of the instruments. Here it is, though the article is a tad mean-spirited.
posted by duffell at 2:27 PM on January 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


genius post title
posted by praemunire at 2:31 PM on January 10, 2019 [3 favorites]


I have no idea what it means that "the trumpet has been coiled so many times that it can't be played," and I can't find a hint of a coiled trumpet in the painting. (This is like a grown up Where's Waldo.)

But, everything else about this sounds like great fun.
posted by eotvos at 2:44 PM on January 10, 2019 [2 favorites]


and since I know you're all wondering: it is not possible to play the flute with your bottom.

I'll bet Ian Anderson could.
posted by Splunge at 2:50 PM on January 10, 2019 [8 favorites]


I assume that the harp with naked humans threaded onto the strings is something we're going to get post-singularity?
I can't wait!
posted by thatwhichfalls at 2:53 PM on January 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


it is not possible to play the flute with your bottom.

Of course not! For that you need a trumpet.
posted by Greg_Ace at 2:56 PM on January 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


and since I know you're all wondering: it is not possible to play the flute with your bottom

— I'll bet Ian Anderson could.


♪♫♬ Sit-ting on a pan flute ♪♫♬
posted by Atom Eyes at 3:10 PM on January 10, 2019 [8 favorites]


"Spitting out pieces from his frozen buuummm!"
posted by Abehammerb Lincoln at 3:15 PM on January 10, 2019 [5 favorites]


a harp with its base thrust violently through a lute

They really should have hired Linda Manzer to tackle the job.
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 3:45 PM on January 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


High resolution images of The Garden of Earthly Delights by nickyskye

I totally missed this back when it was posted. Thanks for re-upping it as a previously in the post!
posted by mandolin conspiracy at 3:46 PM on January 10, 2019


Saw the post title and a pedantic comment started forming in my head, all unbidden. Then I read a bit further.

Well played, sir.
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 3:55 PM on January 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


it is not possible to play the flute with your bottom.

I beg to differ. (NSFW)
posted by Anticipation Of A New Lover's Arrival, The at 3:58 PM on January 10, 2019 [4 favorites]


You can beg all you like....
posted by GenjiandProust at 4:49 PM on January 10, 2019 [2 favorites]


Technically that's a recorder, not a flute. I mean, if you want to be buttdantic about it.
posted by Greg_Ace at 4:51 PM on January 10, 2019


it is not possible to play the flute with your bottom

"Certainly not with *that* attitude!" -- Reverend Mother Gaius Helen Mohiam
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 4:58 PM on January 10, 2019 [8 favorites]


Technically that's a recorder, not a flute. I mean, if you want to be buttdantic about it.

Recorders are technically a type of flute, technically. Just like sharks apparently are technically a type of fish.

I've lost both these arguments before.
posted by Zalzidrax at 6:32 PM on January 10, 2019 [3 favorites]


Missing the JanuaryButt tag.
posted by filthy light thief at 7:36 PM on January 10, 2019 [1 favorite]


Wait, if they’re recorders, they should be playable by butt. I assume the problem with a side-blown flute is that you couldn’t get the right embouchure with your b-hole. But a recorder is a fipple flute, so it just needs a stream of air. The real challenge would be getting a tight seal on the mouthpiece.

In the centuries of people getting drunk, I would be astounded if no one had ever tried this.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 8:57 PM on January 10, 2019 [6 favorites]


And now I’ve written the best comment I could ever hope to write.
posted by shapes that haunt the dusk at 8:58 PM on January 10, 2019 [6 favorites]


The place we're staying has a Bosch dishwasher. Going into the kitchen is a nightmare, but it can do a buttload of dishes.
posted by under_petticoat_rule at 10:03 PM on January 10, 2019 [4 favorites]


Apropos Achewood.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 10:03 PM on January 10, 2019


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