February 15, 2019 9:33 PM   Subscribe

How to make bread. Happy Friday Everyone!
posted by Freelance Demiurge (22 comments total) 14 users marked this as a favorite
This makes me excited and I don't know why. LETS BAKE BREAD.
posted by Homo neanderthalensis at 10:11 PM on February 15 [3 favorites]

Interesting. After it ended, YouTube suggested 'How to make French bread'. Fearing what that video might entail, prudish me closed the window.
posted by zaixfeep at 10:13 PM on February 15 [4 favorites]

that was awesome.
posted by suelac at 10:23 PM on February 15

Content Warning: The 80s. The really really bad part of the 80s.
posted by Revvy at 10:29 PM on February 15 [4 favorites]

This makes me excited and I don't know why

Like.. are you sure you don't know why?

(for anyone else who wants to make bread and has a dutch oven: 3 cups AP flour, 1 teaspoon fine salt, 0.25 to 0.5 teaspoon dry active yeast depending on how cold your apartment is, about 1.25 cup water - enough to make it all hold together and be kind of sticky/shaggy - and then mix and let rise for 8 - 18 hours. punch down, let rise for at least another hour. put dutch oven in regular oven for an hour at 450 degrees F. put loaf in dutch oven (still in regular oven) for 45 minutes with lid on, then 15 minutes lid off, then remove to wire wrack. voila: you have a bread. if you don't have a dutch oven same basic process is fine but put it on a baking sheet with a small pan of water in there as well and just keep an eye on it for a half hour, rotate it, check after another 10 minutes that it sounds hollow if you tap it on its bready bottom; if not, leave it in another 10 minutes and check again)
posted by curious nu at 11:32 PM on February 15 [7 favorites]

let rise for 8 - 18 hours

But I want bread nowwwwwww.

I quite like Jacques Pepin's Soda Bread, which takes an hourish.
posted by Alvy Ampersand at 12:10 AM on February 16 [3 favorites]

I mean what's the worst that could happen, you get biscotti?
posted by rhizome at 1:05 AM on February 16

Blocked in UK: This video contains content from Channel 4, who has (sic) blocked it in your country on copyright grounds.
posted by Lanark at 5:38 AM on February 16

Except for putting his filthy shoes on the work surface during his (admittedly impressive) vertical jump I have no complaints about this bread making technique. That being said, metric measurements would have been nice.
posted by SonInLawOfSam at 7:41 AM on February 16

Good lord, two slices of bread with every meal?
posted by Burhanistan at 8:08 AM on February 16 [1 favorite]

I lost it when he started slicing the bread 😂
posted by joedan at 8:27 AM on February 16 [1 favorite]

metric measurements would have been nice

I'm guessing 21cm, minimum.
posted by Nelson at 9:35 AM on February 16 [1 favorite]

I've been into baking and dipping my toes into breadmaking lately..... And now I know that I need to take off the last 4-6" off my shirt to really advance to the next level of baking skill.

(He really should look at what he's cutting. /safety police)
posted by Fig at 10:47 AM on February 16 [2 favorites]

just white bread, colored brown
posted by mbrubeck at 11:04 AM on February 16 [1 favorite]

I think Vig's video would go nicely with that, but sadly, the video has departed the internet.
posted by MtDewd at 11:36 AM on February 16

Happy Friday? More like Saturday Night Baker (and I'm in a timezone where it was still Friday when the post was posted)
posted by oneswellfoop at 12:13 PM on February 16

This is great. We're actually making multigrain bread for the first time today. Got started this afternoon, and it should be ready by dinner. We skipped the first rise, the recipe we are using didn't call for one. I hope it comes out OK. We're using bread flour and quick rise yeast. The first rise, which was for an hour, more than doubled the size of the loaf.
posted by domo at 12:59 PM on February 16

His cutting the bread is of course an amazing development, but what's up with her knife skills? She's doing a field amputation under fire to that loaf!
posted by rhizome at 3:14 PM on February 16

Bread turned out great! It was this multigrain bread from Epicurious. The seeds went everywhere when we started cutting into it, though. I have to find a way to get them to stick to the loaf better.
posted by domo at 5:00 PM on February 16 [2 favorites]

Fig: dipping my toes into breadmaking lately...

Wait... you knead it with your feet?
posted by evilmomlady at 6:48 PM on February 16 [1 favorite]

True fact: this was the original inspiration for the pottery scene from Ghost.
posted by peeedro at 7:14 PM on February 16

Wait... you knead it with your feet?

Well you know what they say: big feet, big loaf.
posted by rhizome at 7:20 PM on February 16 [2 favorites]

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