Damn it, all over myself again!
November 3, 2011 8:47 PM   Subscribe

 
INVISIBLE MONEY SHOT
posted by Strange Interlude at 8:49 PM on November 3, 2011 [13 favorites]


Is this one of those things where they use photoshop to make porn SFW?
posted by villanelles at dawn at 8:50 PM on November 3, 2011 [3 favorites]


Stock photography is thirsty work.
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 8:51 PM on November 3, 2011 [2 favorites]


Previouslier
posted by schmod at 8:51 PM on November 3, 2011 [1 favorite]


It isn't funny. They have a serious drinking problem, Shirley.
posted by stavrogin at 8:56 PM on November 3, 2011 [28 favorites]


"It was at that moment that I first realized Elaine had doubts about our relationship. And that, as much as anything else, led to my drinking problem."

is the new

"Suddenly Salad!
Is standing beside you
You don't need no makeup
Don't have to pretend
Suddenly Salad!
Is here to provide you
Sweet understanding
Salad's your friend"
posted by Naberius at 8:59 PM on November 3, 2011 [9 favorites]


Is this one of those things where they use photoshop to make porn SFW?


Nope, more odd stock photo choices that seem to happen way too much. ;)
posted by usagizero at 8:59 PM on November 3, 2011


needs NSFW tag.
posted by sweetkid at 9:00 PM on November 3, 2011 [1 favorite]


its almost like a metaphor for something else
posted by Curious Artificer at 9:09 PM on November 3, 2011 [14 favorites]


Not Safe For Water?
posted by mannequito at 9:10 PM on November 3, 2011 [1 favorite]


These are creepily sexual.
posted by Threeway Handshake at 9:11 PM on November 3, 2011 [4 favorites]


Never has pouring water on one's chin given so much joy to so many...
posted by lesbiassparrow at 9:11 PM on November 3, 2011


A seminal moment in advertising.
posted by SPrintF at 9:14 PM on November 3, 2011 [26 favorites]


what is this I don't even
posted by empyrean at 9:19 PM on November 3, 2011 [3 favorites]


bukkaguake?
posted by ericost at 9:20 PM on November 3, 2011 [4 favorites]


HO, HOE, H20
posted by anothermug at 9:22 PM on November 3, 2011 [1 favorite]


sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
posted by bottlebrushtree at 9:26 PM on November 3, 2011


Cigarette?
posted by stavrogin at 9:26 PM on November 3, 2011 [2 favorites]


lulz :D
posted by tumid dahlia at 9:28 PM on November 3, 2011


Without.
posted by kneecapped at 9:30 PM on November 3, 2011


better than the salad one.
posted by mrgrimm at 9:30 PM on November 3, 2011


Waiting for the photo showing a light-skinned curly-haired black woman, a white woman with blond hair, and an Asian woman, all pouring water on their chins at the same time.
posted by elmwood at 9:33 PM on November 3, 2011 [8 favorites]


So salads make us laugh and we have trouble consuming liquids. That's cool.
posted by functionequalsform at 9:42 PM on November 3, 2011 [1 favorite]


You don't win friends with salad.
posted by blaneyphoto at 9:46 PM on November 3, 2011


Oh, COME ON! That is just ridiculous.
posted by Evernix at 9:48 PM on November 3, 2011 [4 favorites]


OH YEA BABY TAKE ALL THAT HYDRATION! TAKE IT ALL!
posted by basicchannel at 9:52 PM on November 3, 2011 [6 favorites]


Meanwhile, virtually all of the men have their lips planted firmly around the bottle. Make of that what you will.
posted by The Card Cheat at 9:56 PM on November 3, 2011 [3 favorites]


Men don't escape entirely, although they seem to prefer taking it on the hair or forehead for some reason.
posted by yellowbinder at 10:02 PM on November 3, 2011 [1 favorite]


I think the site is shilling for the bottled water industry. Or maybe a viral anti-bottled water campaign. I can't tell.
posted by 6550 at 10:03 PM on November 3, 2011


Is now the time to find a clip of Madonna fellating an Evian bottle from Truth or Dare? She really was ahead of her time back in the day.
posted by mandymanwasregistered at 10:09 PM on November 3, 2011 [1 favorite]


Men don't escape entirely

Nah, not nearly as porny.
posted by sweetkid at 10:22 PM on November 3, 2011


Man, remember when Evian was cool?
posted by Threeway Handshake at 10:23 PM on November 3, 2011


Was?

I mean, yes! I remember!
posted by obiwanwasabi at 10:43 PM on November 3, 2011 [1 favorite]


they also do those pictures but with semen. you can find them on the google image search.
posted by planet at 10:44 PM on November 3, 2011 [8 favorites]




Card Cheat, that's a search term issue - when you search "women drinking bottled water" you get the same amount of lip-wrap as with "men drinking bottled water".
posted by gingerest at 10:50 PM on November 3, 2011 [2 favorites]


See men don't have this problem.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 11:06 PM on November 3, 2011 [2 favorites]


Don't know why, but I half expected something contrasting first-worlders angsting out over a salad with third-world women struggling to provide clean drinking water to their families.

Silly me though, it's Metafilter- which means the comments are jokes about ejaculating on a woman's face, with a little otherization of gay men thrown in.
posted by hamida2242 at 11:18 PM on November 3, 2011 [5 favorites]


Ha ha, yeah bros! Chicks can wrap their lips around my...

HAMBURGER.
posted by stinkycheese at 11:27 PM on November 3, 2011


Q: You like water? You are a person who likes the water product that we are currently advertising?

A: Yes! I am! I like water!

Q: You like water! In fact, you are a person who likes water as much as an amphibian loves water!

A: YES I LIKE WATERY WATER AS IF IT WERE MY ECOLOGICAL NICHE!! TELL ME MORE ABOUT IT

Q: YOU ENJOY THIS WATER YOU THIRSTY THIRSTY PERSON etc.
posted by Rhaomi at 11:34 PM on November 3, 2011 [49 favorites]


Oh, COME ON! That is just ridiculous.
posted by Evernix at 9:48 PM on November 3 [+] [!]


I see what you did there.
posted by chavenet at 11:43 PM on November 3, 2011


And they will safely recycle those unnecessary plastic bottles to save the oceans, right?
posted by Cranberry at 11:48 PM on November 3, 2011


See men don't have this problem.

Huh hu huh hu. You said 'semen' huh hu huh.
posted by sharpener at 11:57 PM on November 3, 2011 [2 favorites]


It'd be less of a struggle if they didn't hold the bottle like a foot away. Jeez.
posted by Mister Moofoo at 12:08 AM on November 4, 2011


It's pronounced Sea Man!
posted by mannequito at 12:19 AM on November 4, 2011 [2 favorites]


Silly me though, it's Metafilter- which means the comments are jokes about ejaculating on a woman's face, with a little otherization of gay men thrown in.

I thought the jokes were more about the fact that even a woman drinking water is being sexualized for eyeball-drawing purposes? (Somebody's eyeballs; I wonder whose?) Because it really seems to be a little bit deliberate.
posted by Adventurer at 12:38 AM on November 4, 2011 [8 favorites]


Some of the bottles are BIG.
posted by telstar at 1:54 AM on November 4, 2011


If you think this is bad, you should see what goes on at a typical day spa. Women are literally paying money to receive facials!
posted by ShutterBun at 2:25 AM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


Opened two minutes to early. Love that the sealing was this small string.
posted by Foci for Analysis at 2:58 AM on November 4, 2011


The laughing women thing really is getting ridiculous. Whether the medium is print or video, if it's a food product, you can rest assured that the adult women in the ads will be laughing/giggling like mad over the morsel on their fork.

My current worst-offender is that obnoxious Laughing Cow cheese ad. Women grinning ear-to-ear and giggling madly, as if the acid is just starting to kick-in, spinning in chairs, etc. all over this tiny piece of bland cheese. The whole message seems to be "OMG, I can't believe I'm getting-away with eating cheese!!!" It's just so idiotic.
posted by Thorzdad at 3:22 AM on November 4, 2011 [6 favorites]


Smack the Pony was prescient as usual.
posted by Diablevert at 4:36 AM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


I'm pretty fond of this one, where the stream is drooping and the poor girl doesn't even look like she wants water. Who is the target audience for this picture?

...Must have been made by the pop industry, pushing their anti-water agenda upon us... SEE? HYDRATION IS BAD. CORN SYRUP BEVERAGES MAKE YOU SO MUCH HAPPIER! JOIN THE DIABETES CLUB, AND WE'LL SEND YOU A FREE 2 LITER!
posted by genekelly'srollerskates at 4:36 AM on November 4, 2011


Son, back in my day women actually poured water into their mouths, none of this trying to absorb it through their skin business. Now get off my lawn.
posted by tommasz at 5:16 AM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


The only reason they do this is so they can prove they're really drinking water and not just simulating it. Obviously it's more satisfying to take that stuff right in your mouth and swallow. Unfortunately, now we've got a generation of girls raised to believe that this is perfectly normal, healthy behavior.
posted by pjaust at 5:25 AM on November 4, 2011 [9 favorites]


Who is the target audience for this picture?

14 year-old boys. They're the target audience for everything these days.
posted by octobersurprise at 6:07 AM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


Men apparently have similar issues with milk.

Milk was a bad choice.
posted by Kabanos at 6:14 AM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


Water out of a glass can be just as messy.
posted by Kabanos at 6:36 AM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


I often laugh to myself when someone is tossing my salad.
posted by stormpooper at 7:00 AM on November 4, 2011


I'd say that the target audience for this one [sorta NSFW] is a bit more specific.
posted by Halloween Jack at 8:44 AM on November 4, 2011


I often laugh to myself when someone is tossing my salad.
posted by stormpooper at 7:00 AM on November 4 [+] [!]


Epony-scary.
posted by chavenet at 8:53 AM on November 4, 2011


So men are supposed to see water splashing all over attractive women's faces and think, "boy, I sure could go for some of that on my face right now"?
posted by Stagger Lee at 9:01 AM on November 4, 2011


Cigarette?
Yes, I know.
posted by whuppy at 9:31 AM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


But, that's not important right now.
posted by stavrogin at 10:06 AM on November 4, 2011


I speak jive.
posted by cereselle at 10:20 AM on November 4, 2011


Water out of a glass can be just as messy.

What is going on there? I have seen dogs drink with more composure.
posted by chemoboy at 11:22 AM on November 4, 2011


Those poor, thirsty women. We need to establish a charity of some sort to help train women to hydrate themselves more accurately.

ALTERNATE RESPONSE (patent pending): WE LIKE BUK-KA-KE!!! WE LIKE BUK-KA-KE!!! WE LIKE BUK-KA-KE, I'M A LUCKY FOR YOUR LOVE!!!
posted by deusdiabolus at 11:48 AM on November 4, 2011


omg...please please please internet make "women struggling to drink salad" the next meme!
(mefi photo challenge?)

either that or "women laughing AT, not WITH, yogurt"
posted by sexyrobot at 12:11 PM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


See, this is why men write those hateful things to women, I mean Females, on the computers. Because they’re so stupid! They can’t drink water without pouring it all over themselves, and you know what they’re trying to make you think of there, don’t you? Plus they sit around and giggle over food.
posted by bongo_x at 12:34 PM on November 4, 2011 [1 favorite]


To be fair, some of those salads are pretty funny.
posted by chemoboy at 12:46 PM on November 4, 2011 [2 favorites]


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