Capitalism is evil, give me money so I can protest it.

April 26, 2009 7:58 PM

I STEAL YOUR MONEY.Not for the easily-color-blinded. Plenty of good insane here. Click the big green X and go exploring. TORMENT is particularly busy.
posted by Devils Rancher (36 comments total)

It is a very fine line between good and bad graphic design; some of these pages actually look -- or almost look -- well-designed.
posted by davejay at 8:09 PM on April 26

It's Time Cube cubed.
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 8:09 PM on April 26

also: color-blind does not mean what you think it means
posted by davejay at 8:09 PM on April 26

0_o



Wow.





Wow.
posted by schyler523 at 8:11 PM on April 26

Capitalism is thievery, now buy some shit. Everything about that site is fake and on-purpose. Just more garbage commerce.
posted by nanojath at 8:11 PM on April 26

also: color-blind does not mean what you think it means

No, you're right-- it's much, much worse -- like snow-blindness, but so blindy there's no known word for it.
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:12 PM on April 26

DILUTE! DILUTE!
posted by Countess Elena at 8:16 PM on April 26 [5 favorites has favorites]

I call shenanigans. The layout is artfully "zany", but too cohesive and consistent for a truly insane site. I can see a professional designer at work here, trying to make a crazy site, making lots of consciously garish choices but unable to abandon their core instinctive design skills. The grammar is perfect, links are clear and well structured.

It looks like someone trying to make a point about wealth imbalance, and choosing the medium of "crackpot website" to do so.
posted by CaseyB at 8:16 PM on April 26 [6 favorites has favorites]

Wow. The cats are super pissed I had the speakers on when I clicked the "futile," "despair," or "pain" buttons.
posted by Graygorey at 8:18 PM on April 26

Smells fishy.
posted by Night_owl at 8:18 PM on April 26

CaseyB: "I call shenanigans."


COPYRIGHT © 2008 - Present
posted by Joe Beese at 8:20 PM on April 26

Wait… did I just pay $900 for a t-shirt?
posted by vertigo25 at 8:23 PM on April 26

I call shenanigans. The layout is artfully "zany", but too cohesive and consistent for a truly insane site.

I thought the same, but it seemed plenty entertaining, & someone put a lot of work into it, either way.
posted by Devils Rancher at 8:27 PM on April 26

> It's Time Cube cubed.

Has anyone had a look at Time Cube recently? His nutty exegeses have been pushed onto back pages to make room for insane racist screeds. Just sad.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:28 PM on April 26

It's not insanity, it is artfully presented propoganda, in this case.

"At Midday on April 1st you can wiggle like a fish for 1 minute. Silly FISHY WIGGLING will highlight the ridiculousness of monetary inequality. Capitalist society is very silly. Embrace your absurdity via a 1 min FISHY WIGGLE. There is something very fishy about rich parasites. The absurdity of life must be recognised."

Furthermore, I like this propoganda.
posted by not_on_display at 8:30 PM on April 26

It's like a satire of a batshitinsane site. The corporate world really does gouge consumers and most people are wage-slaves. I'm not sure how sending this guy money will help that.

It seems slightly better than the infomercials that promise $1 x 10^{how ever many zeros you want} per hour on your computer while you sleep scams.

I'm going to put a bag of frozen peas on my eyes now.
posted by double block and bleed at 8:36 PM on April 26

Capitalism is thievery, now buy some shit. Everything about that site is fake and on-purpose. Just more garbage commerce.

It's been fun to try my damndest to buy something from this site, but I don't think it's actually an option, nanojath. There's the rub.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 8:46 PM on April 26

A nutter didn't make this. Just look at it. Or look at the source code.
posted by sonic meat machine at 9:03 PM on April 26 [1 favorite has favorites]

Nah. I think this is legit. The deeper you go (i.e., the later the timestamps on the individual pages) the more progressively weird it gets, until your looking at big, giggling pages filled with photos of dogshit.

Smacks of some kind of progressive, degenerative illness. The pages also become less creative, less engaging, and follow a more linear, formulaic design.

I vote for genuine crazy on this one. Kind of amazing how a belief system (whether it be Christian zionism, communism in the UK, timecubery or whatever) when mixed in equal parts with schizophrenia or some other illness produces eerily similar cocktails of animated .gifs, all-caps screeds and background music. Something something patterns in the brain something something.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 9:04 PM on April 26

but I don't think it's actually an option, nanojath. There's the rub.

It does seem that I must accede that my perceptions are awry. Back to my banal plebeian robotic nonsense toy existence.
posted by nanojath at 9:23 PM on April 26

"THE VASTNESS OF MY MIND IS PHENOMENAL"

That would be fun to put on a business card.
posted by Kattullus at 9:33 PM on April 26

Burhanistan: Has anyone had a look at Time Cube recently? His nutty exegeses have been pushed onto back pages to make room for insane racist screeds. Just sad.

Buh... it's true. How sad. At least he throws in some unexpected racist sentiments (I think he's railing against people who live on the southern hemisphere when he mentions "antipodes" but I'm not entirely sure). But yeah... very sad.
posted by Kattullus at 9:39 PM on April 26

color-blind does not mean what you think it means

It has a lot of 50% saturation green links that turn into 50% saturation red on hover.

That's pretty color-blind hostile right there.
posted by rokusan at 9:56 PM on April 26

► I want to change the world.

comrades, look! look! the passage i quoted proves that i steal your money is not crazy. *they have good intentions*. they are making ART utilizes the ignored form of irony to point out the flaws of capitalism in a way reminiscent of the second international.
the understanding of their intelligence...
the conviction of their anger...
the lucidity of their thought...

this is very challenging work. if you make fun of this work, it is obviously because you just do not get it.
posted by the aloha at 10:02 PM on April 26 [1 favorite has favorites]

I refuse to call shennanigans. There are two alternative possibilities:

1. Even crazy people can be good (or at least competent) at some things, this guy might just be good at coding, or maybe he's really OCD and meticulous about his code, but still crazy.

2. He (or she?) is so crazy, he's incapable of making a website himself, so he paid some kid (or convinced some poor relative) to build him one.
posted by Jon_Evil at 10:28 PM on April 26

<meta name="description" content="Morons are everywhere. The world is a dangerous festering pit populated by savage retards.">

So where on the screen do I insert my credit card?
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 10:44 PM on April 26 [1 favorite has favorites]

He can steal my money... but that money is still on "skillful and deliberate pastiche of mania" rather than sincere schizophrenia.

The visual style is actually an analogue of gonzo, counterintuitively effective direct mail sales copy; actually, I've been wondering for a while if there's some system through which eye-stabbing font/layout/color can be cranked up a notch-- above those mundane levels of ugliness direct marketers call home-- so as to better retain visitor attention and steal more money.
posted by darth_tedious at 12:35 AM on April 27

ALL SERVE THE GRAND COG
posted by Chionophilia at 1:12 AM on April 27

nanojath: Capitalism is thievery, now buy some shit. Everything about that site is fake and on-purpose. Just more garbage commerce.

Jesus, did anybody actually read the site? Right under the big green 'x' that Devils Rancher mentioned is a 'MISSION STATEMENT':

I require funding to exist... but using deception to con idiots out of their “hard-earned-cash” would be immoral... I simply want your money. You will receive NO gimmicks. My enormous consciousness never lusts after vast riches. Arising from my awesome-unrequited-intellect my socially-induced-depression compels me to follow this relatively painless route for my income. My mission to acquire your money is truly honourable.

Geez, folks, it's obviously a joke/parody of scams by a guy who'll probably take the money if it comes to him, but will probably laugh about it either way. Christ, do you think a guy who's selling a 'FREE MUG'—free, of course, with a minimum donation of £500 ($730)! "This free mug offer is not a gimmick." The whole thing's actually rather funny.

People who think this is serious or even intended to be taken seriously for profit should be strapped to a chair and forced to listen to Gang of Four for several hours straight.

Ambrosia Voyeur: It's been fun to try my damndest to buy something from this site, but I don't think it's actually an option, nanojath. There's the rub.

Well, you could always go for that mug.
posted by koeselitz at 2:59 AM on April 27

sonic meat machine: A nutter didn't make this. Just look at it. Or look at the source code.

If your metric for sanity is the quality of source code that a person produces, I'd gently suggest that perhaps you should spend some time coming up with a new system for assessing whether someone is a nutter.
posted by koeselitz at 3:11 AM on April 27 [2 favorites has favorites]

A nutter didn't make this. Just look at it. Or look at the source code.

I dunno. Internal CSS and thatsa lotta divs. Some site coders would call him crazy no matter the content.
posted by Devils Rancher at 5:12 AM on April 27

GIVE ME YOUR FUNDING MONEY NOW
posted by nola at 5:36 AM on April 27

I just sent them all of my money. I think we all should.
posted by ColdChef at 5:52 AM on April 27

X - Liberation
buried treasure
posted by Navelgazer at 7:53 AM on April 27

You guys can mock all you want, but the "Futile -> Despair | Futile -> Decay | Futile -> Misery | Futile * Pain -> Donate" model he has created is clearly the path to making a fortune off of the suffering of Emo-kids.

It's nothing short of genius.
posted by quin at 9:14 AM on April 27

there's always the day of sharing, which coincides nicely with buy nothing day.
posted by msconduct at 9:22 AM on April 27