I don't even...
March 19, 2012 7:15 PM   Subscribe

OneTinyHand.com - Not safe for sanity.
posted by blue_beetle (45 comments total) 21 users marked this as a favorite
 
On the plus side, these celebrities can use their one big hand to paddle for higher ground when the seas rise.
posted by mcstayinskool at 7:20 PM on March 19, 2012


Oh man, this might be the best thing ever. My buddy and I have a running small hand joke, thanks to a child-size oven mitt his roommate's mom sent them years ago. (Why would you send two adult men a child-size oven mitt? NO IDEA. Why would a child-size oven mitt be adorned with a picture of a ship and the word Norway? NO IDEA. But it gave us tons of great laughter material for years to come.)

Because of this, I've been collecting small hands on the internet. If you liked OneTinyHand, you'll love this chihuahua and the saga of the tiny-handed man.
posted by phunniemee at 7:27 PM on March 19, 2012 [12 favorites]


I feel like my sense of my body is shifted. Like it's hacked my cortical homunculus.
posted by mccarty.tim at 7:28 PM on March 19, 2012 [2 favorites]


It's like the opposite of Photoshop Disasters... Photoshop Triumphs!
posted by oneswellfoop at 7:29 PM on March 19, 2012 [3 favorites]


It's like a bizarro manbabies.com
posted by blue_beetle at 7:31 PM on March 19, 2012 [3 favorites]


I have the sudden urge to photoshop Peter Dinklage with one gigantic hand.
posted by R. Schlock at 7:34 PM on March 19, 2012


mccarty.tim, I've seen both cortex and homunculus, and they both have relatively normal-sized hands.
posted by oneswellfoop at 7:38 PM on March 19, 2012 [5 favorites]


Because of this, I've been collecting small hands on the internet.

Better than collecting them elsewhere, I guess.
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 7:46 PM on March 19, 2012 [9 favorites]


Take a look at these hands.
Take a look at these hands.
The hand speaks, the hand of a government man.
Well I'm a Tumblr, born under punches.
I'm soooo [tiny]...
posted by obscurator at 7:49 PM on March 19, 2012 [6 favorites]


Wait, this is a fetish site, isn't it?
posted by Slap*Happy at 8:00 PM on March 19, 2012 [2 favorites]


Something's wrong about those pictures, but I just can't put my tiny little finger on it.
posted by zippy at 8:01 PM on March 19, 2012 [2 favorites]


Fuck that is some hilarious shit.
posted by awfurby at 8:13 PM on March 19, 2012 [1 favorite]


Twelve comments in and no mention of 80's UK TV host Jeremy Beadle and Poland syndrome. And yes, I think I did just link to a website dedicated to celebrity hands.
posted by rh at 8:19 PM on March 19, 2012 [5 favorites]


The Kardashian one almost humanizes her.
posted by Burhanistan at 8:24 PM on March 19, 2012 [3 favorites]


I can only think of this.
posted by annsunny at 8:25 PM on March 19, 2012 [3 favorites]


I don't get it.
posted by cjorgensen at 8:26 PM on March 19, 2012 [2 favorites]


Metafilter: I've been collecting small hands on the internet.
posted by TheNewWazoo at 8:30 PM on March 19, 2012


It's like that Lawrence Welk sketch on SNL, which is also funny occasionally.
posted by not_on_display at 8:41 PM on March 19, 2012 [1 favorite]


Um... okay.
posted by zarq at 8:43 PM on March 19, 2012


I have the sudden urge to photoshop Peter Dinklage with one gigantic hand.

If you can somehow edit the embiggened Dinklage-hand into this video, you win the internet.
posted by Strange Interlude at 8:52 PM on March 19, 2012 [1 favorite]


The one from the Office is perfect.
posted by asnider at 8:54 PM on March 19, 2012 [1 favorite]


That is super disturbing.
posted by heyho at 9:08 PM on March 19, 2012 [1 favorite]


So, is this what LSD feels like?
posted by PhillC at 9:19 PM on March 19, 2012




These hands are small I know but they're not yours they are my own....
posted by The Whelk at 9:29 PM on March 19, 2012 [4 favorites]


Bono. *eyepalm*
posted by wallabear at 9:34 PM on March 19, 2012 [1 favorite]


I was briefly acquainted with someone who had one arm that was very underdeveloped, so he had this for real. Never had the urge to ask him about it; I used to wonder what would happen if he were arrested and fingerprinted, and someone came across the card later. Anyway, this doesn't strike me as particularly funny, maybe because I know that guy.

Except for the one of George Clooney, for some reason.
posted by Halloween Jack at 9:41 PM on March 19, 2012


this reminds me of how portraits by Ingres always seem to have creepy hands. Why could he not paint hands?

Check out this example or this one.
posted by chapps at 9:42 PM on March 19, 2012


No sir, I don't like it.
posted by mazola at 9:48 PM on March 19, 2012


Funny. But isn't that Saruman mislabeled as "Gandalf?"
posted by drjimmy11 at 9:51 PM on March 19, 2012


Missing a Picard face palm
posted by mulligan at 9:54 PM on March 19, 2012


I think the Oprah - Michael Jackson one is going to give me nightmares.
posted by Chaussette and the Pussy Cats at 9:59 PM on March 19, 2012 [2 favorites]


I used to wonder what would happen if he were arrested and fingerprinted

The last time I was at the California Department of Motor Vehicles, I asked this question of the line supervisor. There are, he explained, rules in place for these situations. If a guy a left hand, but no right hand, use the left hand. If the guy has no hands (yes, you can drive with dual prosthesis), you use the right or left toe.
posted by SPrintF at 10:04 PM on March 19, 2012 [2 favorites]


a left hand > has a left hand

(Doesn't have an edit window < Has an edit window)
posted by SPrintF at 10:05 PM on March 19, 2012 [1 favorite]


If the guy has no hands (yes, you can drive with dual prosthesis)...

...and now I feel really sorry for the car dealer who tries to upsell the hands-free kit.
posted by mikurski at 10:07 PM on March 19, 2012


Eh, it's no Birds With Arms. That one forever altered my mental impression of birds. Now they all look armless to me.
posted by maryr at 10:14 PM on March 19, 2012 [3 favorites]


I like to think this website was inspired by the written word of the Wayans brothers and the tore de force which was Chris Elliot's performance... definitely BOTW

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ny6tiH_GTE
posted by matimer at 12:06 AM on March 20, 2012


nobody, not even the rain, has such small hands
posted by chavenet at 3:14 AM on March 20, 2012


Sometimes, I just wanna give the Internet a tiny hand.
posted by kinnakeet at 5:16 AM on March 20, 2012




If you can somehow edit the embiggened Dinklage-hand into this video , you win the internet.

Someone please take him up on this challenge.
posted by rahnefan at 6:40 AM on March 20, 2012


I have a full-sized female mannequin with removable, life-like, but petite, female-sized hands. I'm a 6'5", burly man. It is great, freaky fun for me to wear a long-sleeved shirt and hold the hands--it looks just like these photos.
posted by MrMoonPie at 6:59 AM on March 20, 2012


I have a full-sized female mannequin with removable, life-like, but petite, female-sized hands. I'm a 6'5", burly man. It is great, freaky fun for me to wear a long-sleeved shirt and hold the hands--it looks just like these photos.

This sounds like a first dangerous step on the slippery slope that leads to 'masking'. Be careful, friend... there are unspeakable horrors at the end of that long, dark slide.
posted by FatherDagon at 7:57 AM on March 20, 2012 [2 favorites]


I laughed. I cannot explain why and will not attempt to do so.
posted by that's candlepin at 1:40 PM on March 21, 2012


Photoshop Disasters: I Hate Drawing Hands
posted by XMLicious at 6:01 AM on March 22, 2012


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