Let me be frank
May 22, 2015 3:45 AM   Subscribe

It's a short read, but Food Republic's Ultimate Hot Dog Style Guide may take you a while to digest.
posted by drlith (72 comments total) 12 users marked this as a favorite
 
I wholeheartedly endorse the Baltimore style of including fried bologna. I believe it was invented by Baltimore Jews in the twentieth century. It turns out that if you fry sliced beef bologna on a hot grill, it crisps up into something not entirely unlike bacon.
posted by Faint of Butt at 4:10 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


The Carolina dog is real; the Vietnam thing (a hot dog banh mi, basically) is not.
posted by sonic meat machine at 4:16 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]


Danish hot dog represent! A visit to a pølsevogn (hot dog cart) is one of the first things on my itinerary whenever I'm back. The traditional accompaniment is chocolate milk in a glass bottle (hot in winter, cold in summer is ideal), which seems strange but totally works.

A lot of the other varieties sound bloody tasty as well, and I may have to use summer barbecues as an excuse to try and replicate some of them (where I can get the relevant sausages).
posted by Dysk at 4:20 AM on May 22, 2015


Enjoyed this, but I have one correction: ain't no way the "Norway"'s wrapped in anything but lefse.
posted by Songdog at 4:24 AM on May 22, 2015 [5 favorites]


I visited Chicago for a few days in 2007, and it was the first time I'd encountered a proper Chicago hot dog.

There was a point sometime on that trip when I suddenly realized I'd gone an entire 36-hours eating nothing but hot dogs.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:26 AM on May 22, 2015 [11 favorites]


Iceland. Represent.
posted by parki at 4:39 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]


Aren't Chicago dogs great? I know Shake Shack serves them in NYC, but I'm reluctant to try them.

Actually, I've not had a hot dog in at least a decade. Not even at BBQs. Not even from the street vendors, nor at sporting events. Not even a veggie-dog with a Twinkie bun.

I may actually have to go to Chicago.
posted by droplet at 4:39 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Brats of the web!
posted by chavenet at 4:39 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]




All of the buns look like they're side-cut. This is, of course, unacceptable. Top-cut is the only way.
posted by Jessica Savitch's Coke Spoon at 4:44 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


The Carolina dog is great, but if you ever find yourself in eastern North Carolina, try our regional hot dog variety: a fried red hot link with mustard and spicy horseradish chili on a white bread bun.

Bill's in Little Washington is the best known and is right by the waterfront, but Warren's in Greenville (outside of town by the last of our manufacturing plants) is my favorite.
posted by Ian A.T. at 4:56 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Iceland +1
posted by DZ-015 at 5:00 AM on May 22, 2015


Tell me more about spicy horseradish chili.
posted by hwestiii at 5:01 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]


Also, I must be way more of a Carolina boy than I am comfortable admitting, because before this morning it never occurred to me that the Carolina dog on this chart was a regional thing. I just assumed it was the default hot dog arrangement.

(I wish I could tell you more about horseradish chili but it's a "secret recipe"...hell, I'm not even sure it's horseradish, but that's the prevailing theory here in town. I can tell you that, mysteriously, it's not a red chili but rather a pale white that's almost clear, like the old SNL skit about Crystal Gravy.)
posted by Ian A.T. at 5:09 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


Mustard.

Next Question.
posted by AlonzoMosleyFBI at 5:19 AM on May 22, 2015


Its missing Washington DC's characteristic half smoke.
posted by Blasdelb at 5:25 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Also, I must be way more of a Carolina boy than I am comfortable admitting, because before this morning it never occurred to me that the Carolina dog on this chart was a regional thing. I just assumed it was the default hot dog arrangement.

We always did mustard in addition to chili and onions, but yes, this is the natural hot dog order. I don't even like cole slaw (I know, I know), but it's still the normal way of being for a hot dog. You're also making me really nostalgic for my mom's hot dog chili.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 5:36 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Wait, no Texas Weiner? Is this not as ubiquitous as I thought? I know it isn't from Texas but it should be on here.
Edit: upon further research it seems that the "Michigan" dog would count for this...carry on.
posted by Busmick at 5:49 AM on May 22, 2015


I appreciate the variety, but I like Hawk Krall's hot dog illustrations better.
posted by zamboni at 5:50 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


I simple do not believe that the Korean one -- a corndog wearing a jacket of crinkle-cut fries -- wasn't invented at the Minnesota State Fair.
posted by wenestvedt at 6:00 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


They forgot the Not Dog! Tofu is involved. I have had some that are pretty good.
posted by internet fraud detective squad, station number 9 at 6:03 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


No, no, no. Proper German dog is a simple wurst (style depending on what city you're in - rotewurst in the south, currywurst or weisswurst north) in a hard Kaiser roll with ketchup. The sausage should stick out at least three inches from each end of the roll.

Sausage plate with sauerkraut and all that is for a sit-down meal. Wurst in a roll is eaten on the go.
posted by backseatpilot at 6:15 AM on May 22, 2015


I believe that the word "cole" does not appear in a Carolina dog, or at least, never did when I was there. It was just slaw. Then again, being from Chicago, I didn't eat many hot dogs down there, you guys just didn't know. You just didn't know.

Plus, you had that fucking awesome barbecue and those biscuits, why would I be wasting time with those hot dogs? NOM NOM NOM NOM.

Aside: No matter how drunk you are, Cheerwine and vodka is *not* a good idea. No sir, it is not.
posted by eriko at 6:21 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


Cheerwine and bourbon, obviously.
posted by Bulgaroktonos at 6:24 AM on May 22, 2015 [4 favorites]


No, no, no.

I'm not entirely sure how they selected their dogs, but it's clearly not what you'd get by default if you go to a place and order a "hot dog" (the reddit thread had a swedish subthread where everyone was going "what is that thing and where in Sweden do people eat that?")
posted by effbot at 6:24 AM on May 22, 2015


Had the Czech one in Brussels. They had a heated post like a curling iron to skewer the buns, heating them from the inside before inserting the condiments and wiener. Never seen that anywhere else, and I'm surprised it's not more popular.
posted by GhostintheMachine at 6:31 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


I prefer mine on a stick with school bus mustard...
posted by jim in austin at 6:36 AM on May 22, 2015


sonic meat machine beat me to it, but yeah there's no such thing as a Vietnamese hot dog. They don't exist in Vietnam (source: I was born there). The most Asian style of hot dog that most Vietnamese I know likes to eat in America is the Chinese style, which is sold at a lot of Vietnamese pastry stores.

I was recently at a Mexican bar and had a Tijuana style hotdog for the first time. I can't believe it took me so long to had a bacon wrapped hotdog but now I want it all the time.
posted by numaner at 6:36 AM on May 22, 2015


Really though, a Vietnamese hotdog would be in a half french roll and smothered with sriracha. I would even wrap it with some fried Vietnamese pork.

... I guess I know what I'm gonna try at my memorial day bbq!
posted by numaner at 6:42 AM on May 22, 2015


And then there's The Boomstick.
posted by Fuzzy Monster at 6:52 AM on May 22, 2015


wait wait…is every once missing the GLORY that is that Korean one?
a hot dog coated in french fries…let me repeat that
A.HOT DOG. COATED. IN. FRENCH. FRIES!!!

excuse me booking flight to Korea
posted by ShawnString at 7:27 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


I'm from NY, the wife is from Seattle. Those first two hotdogs explain so much.
posted by Splunge at 7:41 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


When I clicked, somehow I was expecting the latest hot looks and trends in warm-weather dog fashion. Being (theoretically) more of a cat person, I am mostly pleased by this turn of events, but damn, now I want some All-Dressed chips.
posted by The Master and Margarita Mix at 7:44 AM on May 22, 2015


I'm glad they included salchipapas, aka Peruvian style, but I would have liked to see them go even further and mention pique macho, which is Bolivian for Manly Mountain of Meat. It generally includes home fries, hot dog chunks, stir-fried beef, tomatoes, onions, hot peppers, hard boiled egg, and olives (and if you're lucky, some tripe and udder), all drizzled with ketchup, mustard, and mayonnaise like some artery-clogging edible Mt. Vesuvius.
posted by drlith at 7:45 AM on May 22, 2015


They forgot the Not Dog! Tofu is involved. I have had some that are pretty good.

They're not full not dogs but the Hebrew National 90-whatever percent fat free are really good. You can kinda tell that they're TVP dogs with a leeeeeeedle beet of beef thrown in, but they're like no sat-fat and some absurdly low number of calories and still tastier than most normal hot dogs.
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 7:57 AM on May 22, 2015


What about Hot Dogs Bat Masterson?

From Extremely Old Recipes:

Out of the old west comes this recipe, from a stubby gunfighter named Bat Masterson, who was a close friend of Wyatt Earp during the heyday of Dodge City, KS. Later on, he moved to New York City and became, of all things, a sports writer. This recipe was one he invented that became popular all over cowboy towns of the western expansion.

Prairie Dog

Take a wiener and split it lengthwise. Rub the insides of the wiener with ground sage, and broil until done. On one side of a bun, spread mustard and cover with thinly sliced dill pickle. On the other, sprinkle with Worcestershire. "It makes the usual catsup and mustard wiener sandwich taste very poor in comparison"

http://www.tommcmahon.net/2005/08/the_bat_masters.html
posted by thelonius at 8:13 AM on May 22, 2015 [5 favorites]


Michigan is incorrectly labeled. That is not a hot dog, it's a Coney Dog. You get it with a Greek salad that has pink dressing.

It's the best.
posted by leotrotsky at 8:13 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Also, I'd point out that a Chicago Dog would actually better served by a New England Style bun. Due to the number of ingredients, you already need to rotate the Chicago Dog to vertical to prevent topping leakage. The New England Style bun does this by default. You'd only need to add the poppy seeds.

Keep it in mind.
posted by leotrotsky at 8:16 AM on May 22, 2015


Hello, I am person who eats an ungodly amount of hot dogs. I really truly love them. All varieties. My default state is "thinking about hot dogs." And a hot dog taxonomy that calls itself "the ultimate" but leaves off the charbroiled footlong with mustard, onions, and a pickle is just not credible.
posted by everybody had matching towels at 8:17 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Lastly, they're called 'sport' peppers. Get it right, nameless internet person.
posted by leotrotsky at 8:19 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


All-beef, no ketchup, or GTFO.

Having grown up in Chicago -- and, moreover, a very Jewish part of Chicago where half the stores didn't bother carrying pork hot dogs because nobody bought them for kosher reasons, I was honestly horrified the first time I had a regular old pork hot dog of the sort people buy at the store. I almost gagged, not because it was so gross but because my mouth was so SHOCKED by the unexpected flavor and texture. I hadn't realize all-beef dogs were that unusual, nor had I understood why hot dogs got made fun of as gross and bad food for kids who eat Wonder bread. After a couple more bites I was like, yeah, okay, this is pretty rotgut stuff and extremely processed. All beef franks 4eva!
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 8:30 AM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]


So is there a hot dog that is not Hebrew National that is worth eating?
posted by Bee'sWing at 8:37 AM on May 22, 2015


I always assumed that what's called a Michigan Dog came from California.
posted by ZeusHumms at 8:39 AM on May 22, 2015


Lately I've been hooked on Papaya King dogs with bacon, mustard and their "hula hula" pineapple-pepper sauce.
posted by jonmc at 8:47 AM on May 22, 2015


So is there a hot dog that is not Hebrew National that is worth eating?

I am partial to Sahlen's, but I have a strong bias towards anything upstate. They grill like nothing else out there (don't sleep on Zwiegle's, also a tremendous dog, especially when split down the middle).

The general hot dog rule is to stick with a local producer if possible, but HN is a good national standard supermarket dog.
posted by everybody had matching towels at 9:00 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Well, dang it, I know what I'm having for lunch tomorrow, and the local hot-dog joint better not fark 'em up, or I'm not going to be responsible for my actions.
posted by rankfreudlite at 10:31 AM on May 22, 2015


I was never big on slaw so a proper Carolina dog for me is onion, mustard and beef chili. That's it. Preferably from Hap's in Salisbury. I'll eat 2-3 no problem.

Oh and with a freezing cold glass bottle of Cheerwine.



There was a PBS doc a while ago about hot dogs. I especially enjoyed the place in Chicago which refused to put ketchup on for you. If you demanded it, they had ketchup packets you could have, but they sure as hell we're going to ruin a dog with it.
posted by thecjm at 10:47 AM on May 22, 2015


GhostintheMachine, I had one of those in Dusseldorf once, exactly as you describe with the bun warmer. It was a thing of beauty.
posted by slogger at 10:54 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


So is there a hot dog that is not Hebrew National that is worth eating?
Yeah, I committed to the orthodoxy of the Hebrew National long ago - even before my year with a Jewish Girlfriend (although it DID impress her that this Goyem Guy KNEW). Then I discovered Costco's 'food court' dogs ... $1.50 for a 1/4 pound dog PLUS a soda... Vienna brand beef dogs recently replaced by a house brand you can also buy inside the store (in 14-packs)... served plain on a sesame seed bun with a basic condiment bar where you can shovel on all the onions, relish, yellow mustard, brown mustard and/or ketchup you want. Costco's best bargain and comparable to the HN dogs. Yes, they have their own internet fan page.

The Dodger Dogs are an L.A. tradition (which doesn't say much), made by Farmer John's Pork Products, long advertised on the Dodger games with Vin Scully saying about their hogs raised elsewhere then trucked in live to the local plant to be butchered: "the Eastern most in quality, the Western most in flavor". And the foot-longs are sold in the L.A. area supermarkets, but I don't know anyone who puts any of Farmer John's products (even bacon) in their top three brands.

Then there is Pink's, which is one of those "L.A. things", which returned to my radar when they had a big ceremony for a Betty White "Naked Dog" (because she LIKES them plain), which has sadly been since dropped in favor of other celebrity menu items (TODAY SHOW DOG? Way to suck up for publicity). Compared to Costco, atrociously overpriced, and recently named "America's Number One Hot Dog Stand" by FOX NEWS so their credibility is TOTALLY lost.
posted by oneswellfoop at 11:13 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Oh man, now I want Street Meat (the Toronto term for a hot dog from a cart).

Grilled over a flame, sesame bun, mayo, bbq sauce, hot mustard, onions, sauerkraut, pickles. Maybe some fake bacon bits for crunch. Some carts have shredded cheese, which obviously.

Best consumed at about 3am after stumbling out of a bar. Second best while walking along Queen West on a sunny afternoon.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:14 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


My reaction was that hotdogs aren't really a huge deal in Canada. I've had far more donair (oh god Halifax donairs) or poutine than dogs as street food, in the east, and tacos/late night slices in Vancouver.
posted by bonehead at 11:27 AM on May 22, 2015


I'm surprised there aren't more negative comments in here about the prevalence of ketchup in these hot dogs. What is WRONG with you people?
posted by Purposeful Grimace at 11:30 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Ha, that was going to be my comment. Ketchup on dogs is wrong wrong wrong.

To be fair, German ketchup is spicy, so those get a tiny pass.
posted by oneirodynia at 11:33 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


bonehead, unfortunately it's only in the past couple of years that Toronto street food has started lurching from hot dogs only to a wider variety of options. There's the Chinese food truck with the improbably large menu parked outside Robarts a lot, and the burger-and-fries trucks that cluster outside City Hall; until recently that's literally all there was. We're seeing different food trucks come up now, though the city council has implemented the regulations poorly to say the least.

I'll never understand the antipathy towards ketchup on a hot dog.
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:37 AM on May 22, 2015 [2 favorites]


Hot dogs are a food of joy, I don't think it's in the spirit of hot dogs to get weird about how someone else eats their lunch.
posted by everybody had matching towels at 11:38 AM on May 22, 2015 [4 favorites]


sometimes I doubt your commitment to hotdogmotion
posted by feckless fecal fear mongering at 11:39 AM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


"To be fair, German ketchup is spicy, so those get a tiny pass."

Curry ketchup, (or, better yet, fried onions and tomatoes and curry on top of hot dogs or bratwurst is the best innovation in fast food since pho.
posted by Bee'sWing at 12:06 PM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Poppy seed bun. Beef dog. Some kind of mustard. Some kind of pickle relish.

All else is negotiable.

The first time I had a good beef dog + poppyseed, (the "Chicago style" from a drive-in hotdog place now sadly out of business) the sad whitebread buns and mealy Oscar-Meyer dogs of my youth were never going to be good enough again. They are only suitable for drowning in chili and cheese and eating quickly without thinking too much because you're hungry and have lowered your standards.

I am not a fan of slaws or peppers, they just clutter up the dog.

(I am intrigued by the Seattle cream cheese addition though. Hmm.)
posted by emjaybee at 12:51 PM on May 22, 2015


Chicago is the best, but I do like all of the Mexican varieties. Recently had a Colombian one, although it didn't come with egg. It was delicious although a but too saucy for me.
posted by cell divide at 12:59 PM on May 22, 2015


Ketchup on dogs is wrong wrong wrong.

Nonsense. A Bullens pilsnerkorv (first introduced in the fifties to provide a trustworthy canned meat product after a massive salmonella outbreak and not changed since) in a fifties-style bun with ketchup and a spicy mustard is the perfect baseline. Top off with some roasted onions and "Boston" relish if you want to get fancy. Serve with a Pucko.
posted by effbot at 1:17 PM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


Hebrew Nationals are okay. Zwiegles are okay. But if you can find them, Boars Head All Beef Frankfurters are better than okay.

They gotta be the ones that are weirdly shrink-wrapped in a kind of roundish bundle, and when you open the package, each, very long, thin frank is attached to the next, which I have only seen in movies and cartoons.

They are awesome grilled and served with Beano's Heavenly Horse Radish Sauce.
posted by valkane at 1:31 PM on May 22, 2015 [1 favorite]


The one labeled 'Czech Republic' is the one Texans would call a kolache (apparently it's actually not kolache but rather klobasnek in Czech cuisine).

I really actively dislike hot dog-filled kolache: picture a halved hot dog of indifferent quality cooked inside a lackluster bun that now tastes exclusively of half-cooked hot dog. No doubt there are better quality ones out there, but ugh. Give me a Chicago dog or Dodger dog any day.
posted by librarylis at 2:30 PM on May 22, 2015


There are no street carts in Montreal, so you have to go into a restaurant to buy a dog. The Montreal Pool Room is the classic place to buy "deux steamé all-dressed, frites-sauce." I went to CEGEP in St-Laurent, so we tended to go to Decarie Hot Dog.
posted by sfred at 3:07 PM on May 22, 2015


Good luck ordering that in the United States. "I said a Chile dog! Chile!"

Of those pictured, the Coney dog is the canonical dog for me; Vietnam seems like it'd be good; Norway seems like probably a lot of stoned people with mostly empty fridges have independently invented it at various times in the past half-century or so.
posted by Wolfdog at 5:21 PM on May 22, 2015


Vienna Beef. I don't know from any Hebrew National whatever.
posted by Chitownfats at 8:43 PM on May 22, 2015


I wouldn't eat a hot dog that had ketchup only, but combined with other condiments it's fine -- even necessary, if you don't have any relish or sauerkraut available. You need something acidic and a little bit sweet on a hot dog. If all you have is mustard, it's all bass and no treble.
posted by rifflesby at 10:49 PM on May 22, 2015 [3 favorites]


Vienna Beef. I don't know from any Hebrew National whatever.
posted by Chitownfats

Eponysterical
posted by drlith at 5:13 AM on May 23, 2015


If all you have is mustard, it's all bass and no treble.

And every inch of it is perfect from the bun up to the top.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:35 AM on May 23, 2015 [1 favorite]


Sonoran here, living in AZ where all over they like to call hot-dogs "Sonoran-style", meaning "it has bacon". One needs to actually have them in Sonora (México, bordering state with Arizona), preferably in Guaymas. In AZ they still americanize them by what people believe "authenticates" mexican: adding beans, or guac, or cream or, worse, shredded cheese (Colby-Jack, multicolor!).

No. There's something to the bread, something to the Mayo (no lo-fat shit), a real salsa, cebollitas either raw or cooked (which I prefer) and of course the dog itself. Is it beef really or… horse? hmm, then again, around carnaval time (you guys know it as Mardi-Gras) street cats and dogs seem to mysteriously disappear all over town.
posted by tremendo at 7:28 AM on May 23, 2015


See also Lucy Knisley's Hot Dog print. Unfortunately, she doesn't label the ingredients and only delves into some major US hot dog traditions.

I'd love to see more localized variations. Where's the sauerkraut & ketchup onna potato bun from my childhood in CT? (And it was Hummel's skinless hot dogs at home, though I've broadened by horizons now.)
posted by carrioncomfort at 12:53 PM on May 23, 2015


"Vienna Beef. I don't know from any Hebrew National whatever.
posted by Chitownfats

Eponysterical"

Indeedo. If you want to put on a lot of weight quickly and pleasurably, Chicago is your city. Lardage by the yardage.
posted by Chitownfats at 5:32 PM on May 24, 2015


One of the local places here does a dog split down the middle and fried, then filled with whatever you want. Never had it before eating there - now don't want hot dogs another way (thought the Hawaiiian looks awesome).
posted by Deoridhe at 6:11 PM on May 24, 2015


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