In lieu of a year in review...

January 2, 2022 9:37 AM

In lieu of a year in review, here’s 12 months of Foods My Cat Thought Were For Her, But Weren’t: A twitter thread. Threadreader version. The final picture really is the winner.
posted by hippybear (24 comments total)

One of my previous cats, Miss Maggie, would steal individual French fries so fast it was impossible to stop her.
My lovely cat Phoebe covets ham. Sometimes her little cat-breath smells like ham. It’s…disconcerting.
Cats are the best. Thanks for sharing this!
posted by bookmammal at 9:43 AM on January 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

This is fantastic! No cats in my house due to allergies, but I love them so much. Reminds me of the New Year's Eve dinner we were at a while ago where the hosts had a 6 month old lab puppy. They put the steaks out on the counter to rest, as they had always done pre-puppy....and before we could even blink, three of them were gone--puppy had herself a feast that year!
posted by TheFantasticNumberFour at 10:03 AM on January 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

One of my cats has been trying to get into the box of Vegemite and Cheese Shapes I have open at the moment.

She's a nutter butter.
posted by Your Childhood Pet Rock at 10:04 AM on January 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

I have to say, from the look on that cat's face, in particular the squinting eyes, I get the feeling they don't really think that food's for them. Indeed, it seems the epitome of feline "got no shits to give about your human food" that's on full display.

The Vermeer cat at the end though, totally worth it.
posted by chavenet at 10:09 AM on January 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

Wiep, Wodan and Kruimel approve.
posted by Too-Ticky at 10:12 AM on January 2, 2022

what a cute sweet kitty, waiting so patiently for the food she knows she deserves. sitting so politely in her chair. part of the problem is: so much C-food. C is for Cat, so obvs the food is for kitty, duh.

we had Eggs Benedict yesterday. the hollandaise came out Amazing!!!! we let Herbert try a little and the look on his face! tragically I did not get a photo. he definitely found god yesterday. his little mind was blown.
posted by supermedusa at 10:19 AM on January 2, 2022 [5 favorites]

One of my previous cats, Miss Maggie, would steal individual French fries so fast it was impossible to stop her.

Even at the age of twenty, my dear departed Samantha would do the same with broccoli stalks out of Chinese takeout.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 10:26 AM on January 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

Our last cat loved bacon. Not raw. Cooked. If you so much as turned your back just for a second on the bacon (the strips sitting on a paper towel after cooking), he would leap to the counter, grab a slice or two, and run away with it before you had turned back to it. Fast little sucker.
posted by Thorzdad at 10:42 AM on January 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

Besides the predictable likes of chicken and turkey and tuna, our cat Perry loves peanuts (we only let him have roasted unsalted peanuts) and cooked broccoli. Our Christmas eve dinner was ham, and he managed to snag a whole slice of ham and pull it off Mr. gudrun's plate and onto the floor when he wasn't looking. We only figured it out when we could not see the cat, who had been begging previously, and realized he was under the table frantically trying to eat the whole slice before we caught him.
posted by gudrun at 11:15 AM on January 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

And this is how you know your cat is not Jewish or Muslim!
posted by hippybear at 11:21 AM on January 2, 2022

I felt that in some of those pictures the cat was just keeping an eye on events rather than angling for the food - you can really see a different, more interested expression in, for instance, the picture of the shrimp dish on the bench.

Our cat doesn't like human food very much, even foods that most cats like. Sometimes she'll be in the mood for a little plain chicken or fish, and she really likes bison. I usually offer her a little bite of things when she's interested, partly because very often she'll sniff them, decide they're weird and stop pestering me.

One time she did knock down a whole really delicious specialty pizza because she was trying to eat the bacon off it - but that doesn't mean she likes bacon in the ordinary course of events.
posted by Frowner at 11:53 AM on January 2, 2022

I once had a cat that, whenever she heard eggs being cracked open, would come into the kitchen and sit next to the egg-cracker. No begging, no meowing, no leg-brushing, she just quietly waited for the Queen's Share of the bounty. Her stoic patience was always rewarded by being given the bowl to lick out once the raw eggs were decanted.

She also liked the occasional small saucer of milky tea, though milk by itself not so much.
posted by Greg_Ace at 12:00 PM on January 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

I've been meandering through the Great Art Explained in 15 mins series by James Payne; I am mentally enjoying his background information and attention to the great discovery of Vermeer's undoubted masterpiece, Cat Covets Whole-Ass Duck.
My shining prince enjoys banana bread, raw chicken, beef, pork, and select fish (escolar but NOT shrimp) but most especially potato chips.
posted by winesong at 1:47 PM on January 2, 2022 [4 favorites]

"Vermeer's undoubted masterpiece, Cat Covets Whole-Ass Duck" is my first most favoritest (and / or favouritest) thing so far in 2022.
posted by taz at 2:00 PM on January 2, 2022 [13 favorites]

Also, Melanie the blind CH kitty would not be denied her rightful share of the canned green beans.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 2:03 PM on January 2, 2022

That is a good cat. She looks suspicious of the boiled eggs though. Has possibly heard that if you don't crush the shells with a firm paw, witches can use them as boats.
posted by paduasoy at 2:28 PM on January 2, 2022 [7 favorites]

One of my cats loves salad. He prefers spiky leaves, like rocket.
posted by Braeburn at 2:29 PM on January 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

The whole thing is just wrong. Not even sharing the birthday cake. wrong. WRONG. WRONG I say!
And I suppose the homen expects their allotment of invisible mice.
Hummph

Just wrong!
posted by BlueHorse at 3:51 PM on January 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

When I was in high school a fully grown calico with a flat persian face walked in the front door one day, ate some cat food, and decided to stay with us. We put an ad in the paper and posters around the block and no one called, so she was ours (I think she brought our total to 4 at the time). Within a few days she had scratched me to get at the peanut butter sandwich I was eating, dug between couch cushions for a peanut my sister had dropped, and begged for peanut butter cookies. So we named her Peanut. She kept that love of peanuts for life but would eat nothing else but kibble. Not even tuna water, if we drained a tuna can onto the kibble she would refuse to eat until we put out fresh dry kibble.

Before that we had a cat that ate pickles. that was the weirdest.
posted by buildmyworld at 6:04 PM on January 2, 2022 [3 favorites]

One of ours likes sliced black olives from pizza.
posted by kirkaracha at 6:28 PM on January 2, 2022 [1 favorite]

Before that we had a cat that ate pickles.

There's a children's book contained in that sentence, really.
posted by hippybear at 8:12 PM on January 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

Pickles the Fire Cat perhaps?

One of our cats loves cheezies, or really anything with powdered cheese on it. The other cat just wants whatever you're eating. Our previous cat liked dark ales.
posted by giltay at 9:42 PM on January 2, 2022 [2 favorites]

Cats can have a little Whole-Ass Duck, as a treat.
posted by AlSweigart at 8:26 AM on January 3, 2022

Mine is very patient and well mannered until it's clear we're done eating, and then, no matter what was on them before, they're rinsed enough to go into the dishwasher.

She's especially a fiend for pastries and sweets, like syrup left over after pancakes or remnants of frosting from cake.
posted by mikesch at 8:55 AM on January 3, 2022 [2 favorites]