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Eel slap.
October 4, 2009 5:06 AM   Subscribe

Eel slap.
posted by slater (70 comments total) 20 users marked this as a favorite

 
This is strangely sensual.
posted by stavrogin at 5:08 AM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


as advertised.
posted by atchafalaya at 5:09 AM on October 4, 2009


Needs sound.
posted by atchafalaya at 5:10 AM on October 4, 2009


Seal clap.
posted by milquetoast at 5:13 AM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


Teal Flap
posted by HuronBob at 5:14 AM on October 4, 2009


Biel Fap
posted by poppo at 5:20 AM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


Steel Cap.
posted by louche mustachio at 5:24 AM on October 4, 2009


This is strangely sensual.

It's that trail of jism that the eel leaves in it's wake that makes it so.
posted by PeterMcDermott at 5:25 AM on October 4, 2009 [2 favorites]


Um:

GET FLASH YOU MOFO.

Not a terribly friendly site ...
posted by cstross at 5:35 AM on October 4, 2009


Now do it with a large trout
posted by yoHighness at 5:35 AM on October 4, 2009 [2 favorites]


Meal nap

(I really enjoyed that, slater.)
posted by Rumpled at 5:36 AM on October 4, 2009


Veal nap.
posted by minimii at 5:39 AM on October 4, 2009


Deal Map
posted by Blazecock Pileon at 5:41 AM on October 4, 2009


What a strange coincidence! Just last night on the euphamismator I rolled "Jerry spent too much time on the Internet watching people slapping the electric eel."
posted by drlith at 5:55 AM on October 4, 2009


Beale Rap
posted by horsemuth at 5:57 AM on October 4, 2009 [2 favorites]


I like to do it backwards, and pretend that the point is for the nice eel to wipe the man's face clean.
posted by dephlogisticated at 5:59 AM on October 4, 2009 [9 favorites]


Is this site owned by a vengeful Gorton's fisherman?
posted by HeroZero at 6:02 AM on October 4, 2009


Kiel snap.
posted by Admiral Haddock at 6:06 AM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


I had hoped that this was some sort of charming video in which a hyperactive sushi chef slammed down delicious unagi onto the waiting tongues of various participants, but alas, it was not so. Mmmm, unagi.
posted by adipocere at 6:06 AM on October 4, 2009


Deal crap.
posted by Astro Zombie at 6:18 AM on October 4, 2009


Heel fap
posted by knave at 6:19 AM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


Foolscap
posted by permafrost at 6:28 AM on October 4, 2009


Deal lap.
(run Bob run!)
posted by Mizu at 6:33 AM on October 4, 2009


Knee slap
posted by PlusDistance at 6:36 AM on October 4, 2009


C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!!!!!!!
posted by Henry C. Mabuse at 6:41 AM on October 4, 2009 [8 favorites]


Heal crap
posted by Secret Life of Gravy at 6:41 AM on October 4, 2009


The tensing up of the victim's face prior to impact is serene in reverse; in slow motion we see shock and pain gradually yield to relief and relaxation. It is so satisfying to watch a transition normally lost in an eye blink's time with all its complexity and nuance, and to see just how granular the gradation between expressional and expressionless truly is. Pan as slowly as possible from left to right and try to become aware of the exact moment that his face communicates nothing at all—you'll find this eerie, frozen moment that can only exist outside of linear time is the optimal starting place to begin reclaiming the process of relief. Whack the fucker as quickly as you can move the mouse. Now repeat, and ponder the cyclical nature of the human experience.
posted by Mr. Anthropomorphism at 6:47 AM on October 4, 2009 [14 favorites]


This is what the internet is for. Thank you.
posted by jimmythefish at 6:56 AM on October 4, 2009


CUH CUH CRUMBLE BAKER
posted by tehloki at 7:06 AM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


Eel's lap (no link; eels don't have laps).
posted by crazylegs at 7:09 AM on October 4, 2009 [2 favorites]


shock and pain gradually yield to relief and relaxation

Perhaps we could MRI the eel afterward and see if he can detect these emotions!
posted by tractorfeed at 7:20 AM on October 4, 2009


This is what the internet is for.

Eponysterical
posted by PeterMcDermott at 7:23 AM on October 4, 2009


righteous
posted by mistersquid at 7:27 AM on October 4, 2009


atchafalaya: Needs sound.

Just let this play in the background instead.
posted by Greg_Ace at 7:36 AM on October 4, 2009


Does precisely what it says on the tin. A++++ would buy again.
posted by blixco at 7:37 AM on October 4, 2009


Thanks, I needed that.
posted by whatzit at 7:46 AM on October 4, 2009


I moved my mouse in the wrong direction so that poor sticky man had his composure restored by that eel. Win!
posted by jessamyn at 8:13 AM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


Fish Slapping Dance
posted by mr.marx at 8:23 AM on October 4, 2009


What is bad front page posts on metafilter, Alex.
posted by Ironmouth at 8:49 AM on October 4, 2009


Lacks hovercraft.
posted by hawthorne at 8:52 AM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


That was awesome. Thanks.

And this is a fantastic thread.
posted by Lutoslawski at 9:15 AM on October 4, 2009


The cursor moves back and forth between the ear and the eyebrow.
The cursor moves back and forth between the ear and the eyebrow.
The cursor moves back and forth between the ear and the eyebrow.
The cursor moves back and forth between the ear and the eyebrow.
The cursor moves back and forth between the ear and the eyebrow.
The cursor moves back and forth between the ear and the eyebrow...
posted by Decimask at 9:26 AM on October 4, 2009


heel tap
posted by a womble is an active kind of sloth at 9:49 AM on October 4, 2009


I move away from the eel to breathe in
posted by m0nm0n at 9:49 AM on October 4, 2009 [3 favorites]


EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL SLAP!

SQUISHY!
posted by The Whelk at 9:54 AM on October 4, 2009


If the stock market goes down, does he take off his clothes, a la Puma Index?
Because I would watch
posted by msbutah at 10:14 AM on October 4, 2009


Metafilter: Move away from the eel to breathe in.
posted by Lipstick Thespian at 10:18 AM on October 4, 2009


Preposterous.
posted by From Bklyn at 10:24 AM on October 4, 2009


It certainly is.
posted by jquinby at 12:14 PM on October 4, 2009


Heel crap
posted by applemeat at 12:24 PM on October 4, 2009


Neil's snap!
posted by wendell at 1:08 PM on October 4, 2009


It is so satisfying to watch a transition normally lost in an eye blink's time with all its complexity and nuance, and to see just how granular the gradation between expressional and expressionless truly is.

Without the forward-reverse, but I enjoy the subtle tension in a few of these. Probably instructed not to tense up but under the circumstances... Previously
posted by Durn Bronzefist at 1:24 PM on October 4, 2009


Blue crap
posted by Kloryne at 1:32 PM on October 4, 2009


Fish Slapping Dance

That took much too long. Come on, Metafilter, you can do better.
posted by neuron at 1:53 PM on October 4, 2009


Tennille + Cap
posted by ...possums at 2:36 PM on October 4, 2009


Congealed sap
posted by applemeat at 2:54 PM on October 4, 2009


The tensing up of the victim's face prior to impact is serene in reverse; in slow motion we see shock and pain gradually yield to relief and relaxation. It is so satisfying to watch a transition normally lost in an eye blink's time with all its complexity and nuance, and to see just how granular the gradation between expressional and expressionless truly is. Pan as slowly as possible from left to right and try to become aware of the exact moment that his face communicates nothing at all—you'll find this eerie, frozen moment that can only exist outside of linear time is the optimal starting place to begin reclaiming the process of relief. Whack the fucker as quickly as you can move the mouse. Now repeat, and ponder the cyclical nature of the human experience.

I cannot believe you managed to make that meaningful.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 3:31 PM on October 4, 2009


I'm deeply concerned for the well-being of this eel. I didn't see any disclaimers stating that it wasn't hurt during the filming of this video. (Insert nonexistent irony emoticon here.)
posted by cowpattybingo at 3:58 PM on October 4, 2009


If you move the cursor back and forth just a bit, right between the impact and a little after, you can imagine that the eel is snuggling up to the fellow in a loving gesture.

I promise you will view eels differently after doing this.
posted by orme at 5:09 PM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


I cannot favourite this post enough. Truly BOTW!!
posted by pompomtom at 6:40 PM on October 4, 2009


Poor eel.
posted by djduckie at 7:48 PM on October 4, 2009 [1 favorite]


Squeal, trap!
posted by Joseph Gurl at 7:56 PM on October 4, 2009


Peal crap.
posted by FormlessOne at 9:52 PM on October 4, 2009


This goes back quite a ways, really.
posted by Kronos_to_Earth at 12:56 AM on October 5, 2009


What is that white speck going up behind him right as he gets hit by the eel?
posted by fizzzzzzzzzzzy at 5:16 AM on October 5, 2009


Two for flinching!
posted by wenestvedt at 6:27 AM on October 5, 2009 [1 favorite]


eel schmutz.
posted by boo_radley at 6:28 AM on October 5, 2009


Don't Threaten Me With a Dead Fish!
posted by nfg at 9:14 AM on October 5, 2009


MMM unagi!
posted by sciurus at 11:11 AM on October 5, 2009


DATELINE -- THE FUTURE! It is late in the year 2009, and after years of feverish work, scientists at a top-secret government laboratory have, for the first time in human history, isolated the look on a man's face the very moment before being slapped with an eel.

"They say science will never discover the human soul," said Professor Lars von Trist, speaking to an assembled crowd of reporters. "And yet, gentlemen, I give you this. Tell me this expression does not reveal the hand of God?"

Scientists have long known that men wear one expression before being slapped with an eel, and another, markedly different expression immediately afterwards. This led to conjecture that there was a missing, transitional expression that has yet to be detected.

To conduct the experiment, scientists built an underground Large Eel Collider that would impact the front end of an eel with the face of a subject, and capture the fleeting photoic emissions that resulted.

"What this image shows us is that the man is about to be slapped with an eel, at the exact moment prior to impact, looks like a man who knows that he is about to be slapped with an eel, and is not looking forward to it," said Professor von Trist, cleaning his glasses.

The professor paused a moment, and added "Science!"
posted by bicyclefish at 3:55 PM on October 5, 2009 [1 favorite]


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