MetaFilter

Never mind the rap lyrics, you won't be able to discern any of them. This show is going to be unbelievably loud and intense, and as someone who doesn't like modern rap you are going to hate it a lot.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by East Manitoba Regional Junior Kabaddi Champion '94 at 1:41 PM on April 22, 2012

Where is the inflatable auto-pilot?
posted to MetaFilter by munchingzombie at 2:51 PM on March 15, 2012

Metafilter is a community weblog, with user generated links collected into "posts". There is a space for comments and discussion. Both posts and comments are regulated by "mods", paid employees. While not visible to a site visitor, they are presumably wearing pants. The entrance fee ($5) also grants posting and commenting rights to several subsites, including Ask Metafilter, MetaTalk and Metafilter Music. New users must comment before they are allowed to post. The main... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Orange Pamplemousse at 10:27 AM on March 8, 2012

You have to really understand Scandinavian Lutherans to get why this review is scathing. Motherfuckers will smile at you, serve you up a plate of hot dish and all the while be shivving you with their eyes. You won't know it, but the rest of the people in the church basement will. Oh, you'll still get invited to the picnics and the swap meets and all that. But the smiles. They'll be...tighter. The eyes will be...harder.

Ok, fuck it. You'll never know.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by R. Schlock at 10:27 AM on March 8, 2012

This is a dick post, made to laugh at folks in North Dakota for being far away from everywhere and not knowing where they ought to eat. There's not much in Grand Forks, and you ought not begrudge folks for eating somewhere like the Olive Garden when it's available.

And speaking as someone with family from North Dakota: fuck you.
posted to MetaFilter by barnacles at 10:13 AM on March 8, 2012

Not so negative that she won't go back on a warm day for the raspberry lemonade.
posted to MetaFilter by DU at 10:08 AM on March 8, 2012

I will admit that using the latin for "speed kills" is cute in a callous, military sort of way.

Too bad they couldn't conjucate the verb correctly (eradicat). Never mind the fact that eradico means "to pull up by the roots" instead of "kills"....
posted to MetaFilter by zeugitai_guy at 6:38 PM on February 28, 2012

FJT: "Or how Pabst Blue Ribbon is marketed in China vs. the US."

I so, so, so hope this involves Dennis Hopper.
posted to MetaFilter by Joakim Ziegler at 12:09 PM on November 26, 2011

An American Jew was shopping on Regent Street in London. He entered a posh gourmet food store. A sales representative, in a long morning coat with tie and tails, approached.

"May I be of help to you, sir?"

"Yes. I'd like a pound of lox."

"Sorry, sir - do you mean smoked salmon?"

"Okay, a pound of smoked salmon."

"Anything else,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by growabrain at 9:58 PM on June 24, 2011

I'm guessing they play Borderlands on a console because the answer wouldn't have been so positive otherwise.

Snark aside, this was really cute.
posted to MetaFilter by Memo at 9:48 AM on April 24, 2011

This seems as good a place as any to tell the cautionary tale of what happened to my sister (a legitimate Harvard grad!) when, as a TA, she discovered one of her student's own acts of plagiarism.

It was the fall of 1989, and my sister was a Ph.D. student in history at Berkeley, specializing in 18th-century Britain. For one of her class's assignment, a student turned in work that seemed... familiar. Strangely familiar. Indeed, personally familiar... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by scody at 3:06 PM on May 18, 2010

shothotbot: "Anything a random MySQL user needs to worry about?"

Data integrity?
posted to MetaFilter by pwnguin at 7:30 AM on April 18, 2011

What if you tried to construct motivations for the Libya intervention that ignored oil. How likely would they sound?
posted to Ask MetaFilter by telstar at 5:07 PM on March 23, 2011

> The President should 100% be fucking around with whether people who make comments about suicide go on suicide watch.

No, we're talking about the man being deprived of all his clothing and being forced to stand to attention naked outside his jail cell every morning in front of male and female guards.

We're talking about someone being punished if he speaks to guards, but being forced to reply every few minutes when the guards talk to him.... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by lupus_yonderboy at 7:45 AM on March 12, 2011

How's that hopey changey thing workin' out for ya?
posted to MetaFilter by clarknova at 7:21 AM on March 12, 2011

If Lady Gaga posts are outlawed, only outlaws will have Lady Gaga.
posted to MetaTalk by lukemeister at 11:08 AM on February 28, 2011

What'd be awesome would be if Illinois state workers union members were to show up with pizza and possibly human wall building potential if required.

Could you imagine, after all the various 1-day marches in DC over the past year or three, suddenly the Middle East starts showing what truely effective demonstrations are and how they work and what they do, and it sparks a full-on worker movement here in the US?
posted to MetaFilter by hippybear at 2:22 PM on February 17, 2011

The worst thing I can possibly wish on Republican voters is that they actually get the country they apparently want.
posted to MetaFilter by Legomancer at 10:21 AM on February 17, 2011

Well, Straw College Professors do, sure....
posted to MetaFilter by Kyol at 10:09 AM on February 17, 2011

"Re-reading the Republican Contract With America"
posted to Ask MetaFilter by timsteil at 3:58 PM on January 18, 2011

"Rubbing bacon" (which dates back at least five centuries before you scenesters arrived on the scene with your smoked-pork fetishes)
posted to Ask MetaFilter by drlith at 1:15 PM on January 18, 2011

We refer to that in our house as "reading the Bible." But then, we're terrible, terrible people.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by JoanArkham at 12:43 PM on January 18, 2011 marked best answer

"fucking" but not "fucking the shit out of".
posted to Ask MetaFilter by booknerd at 12:32 PM on January 18, 2011 marked best answer

We could solve all of this economic segregation by increasing the price of gas to $9/gallon.
posted to MetaFilter by The Giant Squid at 10:52 AM on January 17, 2011

"Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in arms is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children. The cost of one modern heavy bomber is this: a modern brick school in more than 30 cities. It is two electric power plants, each serving a town of 60,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by entropicamericana at 2:19 PM on January 10, 2011

Fighter jets are a doomed species. The limits on their weight, acceleration, cost, and agility are all due to having a big squishy sack of water inside a suit inside a glass bubble at the front. Why we spend billions on fighter jets when fighter UAVs are just around the corner is beyond me.

The water sacks eventually get big and/or squishy enough to become generals who then make decisions about what kind of war machines to buy.
posted to MetaFilter by Hiding From Goro at 10:09 PM on December 31, 2010

In Seattle you got volunteer park. It's really hip. A drinking water reservoir is there, nice view of Mt. Rainier, Puget Sound and the skyline plus a killer botanical garden. The lady I was with at the time lived within walking distance and after dinner we would always pass thru the park. Because it was a notorious gay pick up spot, it was always good for some mindless distraction. Now the way it works in this park, the lonely half will take their pets for a walk, the more exotic, the better a... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by I love you more when I eat paint chips at 8:19 PM on December 27, 2010

Well, as long as Julian Assange promises that releasing this latest round of information will prevent wars and terrorist attacks and more death, I guess everything is okay.

Why do grown adults say things like this?
posted to MetaFilter by Blazecock Pileon at 11:02 AM on November 28, 2010

Oh man, please please please Baby Allah send him to the slammer.
posted to MetaFilter by bardic at 8:06 PM on November 24, 2010

There once was a dude nicknamed hammer
A notorious political scammer
A lumbering ass
Found laundering cash
And (hopefully) thrown in the slammer
posted to MetaFilter by googly at 6:47 PM on November 24, 2010

Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit.
posted to MetaFilter by hutta at 6:44 PM on November 24, 2010

It's only a problem if you're using federal research funds.

I could probably pull that off. I write a mean proposal.
posted to MetaFilter by muddgirl at 3:53 PM on August 25, 2010

My baby niece died of cancer. Other babies will die, real living human beings not 5 cells clumped together, because of these idiots delaying research because they have to shove their religion into our government. Fuck off and die you pieces of garbage.
posted to MetaFilter by furiousxgeorge at 3:34 PM on August 25, 2010

Well, I'm against it.
posted to MetaFilter by TwelveTwo at 11:42 PM on August 21, 2010

It's an E-Meter!
posted to MetaFilter by Artw at 9:52 AM on June 25, 2010

Change your phones antenna. Not that big of a deal.
posted to MetaFilter by koeselitz at 9:09 AM on June 25, 2010

...DEVICE THAT GIVES EVERYONE BONERS!

Don't believe every piece of spam you receive.
posted to MetaFilter by Babblesort at 9:02 AM on June 25, 2010

Fuck Gary, anyway. He is dead and she is here with an alien pressed against her cervix.

Band name or album name, I can't decide.
posted to MetaFilter by Durn Bronzefist at 11:55 AM on May 17, 2010

^ eponysterical ^
posted to MetaFilter by goodnewsfortheinsane at 7:29 PM on May 15, 2010

If you make Steve Jobs look like less of an asshole than you, you have a serious asshole problem.
posted to MetaFilter by dirigibleman at 2:54 PM on May 15, 2010

This guy is HARDCORE when his wife is out of town.
Creme de menthe cocktails and emails to Steve Jobs.
Was Sex in the City not on?
posted to MetaFilter by chococat at 1:59 PM on May 15, 2010

This was inevitable; it all went to shit after Ben Stone left.
posted to MetaFilter by mosk at 11:37 AM on May 14, 2010

'Boldness and self linking: The keys to my failure' by Reed de Guidelines.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by biffa at 7:13 AM on May 14, 2010

If they are identical twins, I'd suggest setting up single persona that they both play. This way you have two people sharing a job that usually can't be shared, making production easier, workloads less, and vacations easier to arrange. They can take turns going to trade shows, etc.

If they get popular, you can start seeding rumors of an "evil twin" or "cloning experiment", then set up a "super-premium" area of the site (above and beyond the... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by mikepop at 5:24 AM on May 14, 2010

I think you're probably a bit too charming for most on-line dating sites. You should avoid them.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by bondcliff at 1:16 PM on May 5, 2010

Apple went though the effort of building their own damn office suite rather than just shipping OpenOffice or something because they really really believe that native programs are better than cross-platform ones. And on the Mac, which is a powerful enough platform to be able to handle the overhead of things like XUL and AIR, this is still obvious when you put a Cocoa app beside one built with a cross-platform toolkit. On the iPhone the platform is much more limited. Having the shiniest Twitter... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by Space Coyote at 7:44 AM on April 29, 2010

Every time I've been at a party where deep-dish is being served, if it's got meat, you can pretty much guarantee it's going to be a lot of meat. More meat than a small village could eat in a week.

I hereby cordially invite you to a Sunday afternoon at Pequod's with myself, my wife, and several pitchers of Goose Island.
posted to MetaFilter by shakespeherian at 2:41 PM on April 20, 2010

I guess this just means for us non-USians that we must all pucker up and be nice to the US, or one day they'll come with their fancy gunships and aircraft carriers and artillery and blow us all to kingdom come.

This is inflammatory and alarmist. We're only going to blow away brown people with oil and you know it.
posted to MetaFilter by Mayor Curley at 8:29 AM on April 5, 2010

The Evils of "Socialism"
Author Unknown

This morning I was awakened by my alarm clock, powered by socialist electricity generated by the public power monopoly regulated by the US Department of Energy. I then took a shower in the socialist clean water provided by the municipal water utility. After that, I turned on the socialist radio to one of the FCC regulated channels to hear what the socialist National Weather Service of the National... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by jannw at 12:50 AM on March 23, 2010 marked best answer

Boston's great! I don't know why people think it's inhospitable.

Don't move to Pittsburgh; I couldn't wait to move out of there. It was a nasty place.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by reddot at 5:11 PM on July 5, 2009