MetaFilter

Oh, friend, you are certainly in a place to pursue therapy! You are worthy of the therapist's time! I've been in therapy for years and have continued to be in therapy despite many of the problems I was having in the past having since been resolved.

Like, you wouldn't say, "I have very high blood pressure, but I am not going to pursue medical care because someone else is having a stroke."

I don't want to say you are overthinking,... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by bluedaisy at 2:46 PM on November 3, 2023

Please don't worry about "taking resources away from someone else who really needs it." You will benefit from therapy. Tell them if you're a danger to yourself and follow their guidance. Tell them if you don't believe you're a danger to yourself. You are not wasting anybody's time. Everything you told us here is good to take with you to your first session. Consider printing it out or showing it to them on your phone even. You may wish to ask for tools for not feeling like you are now.... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by knile at 2:30 PM on November 3, 2023

You're describing a series of absolutely textbook reasons to go to therapy. Yes, your bullshit counts. Yes, this is worth talking about (and possibly also getting medication support for.) No, everyone does not think about suicide every day, not even unseriously. You sound unhappy in ways that therapy might be able to help, and that's what it is for.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by restless_nomad at 2:25 PM on November 3, 2023

(I should add as a former stay at home parent, in some social circles "I'm a realtor" or "I'm a consultant" or "I have an Etsy store" is more respectable than "I'm a homemaker.")
posted to Ask MetaFilter by muddgirl at 6:42 AM on November 1, 2023

Raise the head of your teen's bed using books or blocks, or risers made specially for this purpose. It is an important step to take for helping mitigate GERD, if this does indeed turn out to be GERD.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by ojocaliente at 7:39 AM on October 30, 2023

It is really common not to test positive for COVID the first couple of days or even not to test positive at all with any of those home tests. My partner came home with symptoms, tested positive and it took me three days to test positive even though I felt sick by then. Sadly, a lot of bosses and people don't believe that but I'd not assume from one test the very first day that it's not COVID. If you have symptoms in line with the current version of COVID, you could tell your boss that.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by BibiRose at 6:40 AM on October 30, 2023

I would wear a mask to protect others and go.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by DarlingBri at 6:38 AM on October 30, 2023

How do you deal when your partner can’t or won’t manage their blood sugar issues?

"Partner" implies that both people are putting in a comparable degree of commitment to the cause.

Something to think about, you might not actually be "partners" in this effort.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by mhoye at 8:46 PM on October 30, 2023

I had to leave the partner who refused to control their diabetes. His rage at the disease and refusal to do anything to help himself turned into abuse aimed directly at me.

In your shoes I guess I would start by asking yourself what your pie-in-the-sky, most ideal outcome is and then find out what your partner's ideal outcome might be. If they have features in common you can work together to create a plan to reach those goals. If there is little in common it might be... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by MagnificentVacuum at 8:06 PM on October 30, 2023 marked best answer

Your partner is behaving immaturely and unreasonably. Maybe he legitimately cannot feed himself, shop for himself, or regulate his blood sugar and mood, but regardless... he could participate in finding a solution that is workable. It doesn't sound like he has done any of that besides sometimes have a snack.

I'll skip further editorializing, but the picture you've painted is not a sustainable relationship dynamic.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by so fucking future at 8:03 PM on October 30, 2023

He’s an adult. He is responsible for feeding himself.

If he’s too much to be around when he hasn’t eaten, then you need to be elsewhere. Study at the library, silence your phone.

My partner had unmanaged food issues and while it wasn’t the reason we separated, it was one of the top 3.

You can support him by getting him a new dietitian that deals with disorders in eating and can deal with executive dysfunction around... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by shock muppet at 7:39 PM on October 30, 2023 marked best answer

To answer your top-level question: Mr. Blah and I both have some dietary restrictions, and we generally keep them in mind when making a grocery list via an app we both have access to. Whoever's doing the marketing picks up what we both want. But if either of us finds ourselves without something we want to eat, it's on us to figure out a workaround or get the thing we need.

To answer the question you didn't ask: This seems totally unsustainable and it puts way too much of... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by BlahLaLa at 7:14 PM on October 30, 2023 marked best answer

Or put the rice in small Ziploc bags of say 50ml each and see how many fit inside the glass.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by any portmanteau in a storm at 9:35 AM on October 30, 2023

Your other local epidemiologist (me) says that a lot of people in my field are still taking whatever vaccines are available. If you have a wealth of choice, I'd go with switching modalities between doses. This probably only makes a difference that's relevant at the population scale rather than the individual scale, but hey! A rising tide raises all ships.

And no, no need to overdose. You're not going to glean remarkable increases in immune response... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by late afternoon dreaming hotel at 6:21 PM on October 29, 2023

slight derail but seems like an opportunity to insert a gentle reminder that buying groceries specifically at Target undermines union grocery workers in your area. Groceries are one of the last areas of the American private sector where you can choose union labor, if there are union grocery stores where you live.
(I believe Target is specifically an American retail experience but either way can't speak to union status in other countries.)
posted to MetaFilter by kensington314 at 5:53 PM on October 28, 2023

If you see someone shoplifting, mind your own fucking business. Let Batman handle it. Consequences for such a small thing can be stupidly overboard - maybe even prison. Let it go.
posted to MetaFilter by adept256 at 4:18 PM on October 28, 2023

I'd also be curious how much self checkout is contributing to shrink. Just a few days ago, I got some reasonably pricey windshield wiper blades for nothing at Walmart because I forgot they were under the dog kibble at self checkout. I realized when I got out to the car, and debated doing the right thing by standing in the always long return/customer service line, staffed by some amusingly indifferent employees, or just leave.

I left.

Even though... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by 2N2222 at 2:28 PM on October 28, 2023

I understand the desire to not limit personal freedom, but smoking & vaping are things that, even if people are doing them inside their own homes, affect other people living near them. It's not just the gross butt-litter, which will continue as long as there are people smoking cigarettes, but also the smell and the health effects of smoking & vaping, both of which permeate outside individual condo units.

Units belonging to smokers also require a lot more cleanup... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by rhiannonstone at 1:19 PM on October 27, 2023

Etsy has Godzilla favor boxes, birthday banners, plushes, cupcake and cake toppers, stickers, cups, stickers etc.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by DarlingBri at 4:47 AM on October 28, 2023

I'd rent or buy one of those dinosaur costumes and just as the party is in full swing, make my appearance...
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Czjewel at 4:08 PM on October 27, 2023

Hm...A little city is probably doable. We have a large amount of cardboard around at the moment.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by The Elusive Architeuthis at 3:22 PM on October 27, 2023

I love phooky's idea - would birthday kid and his older brother be up for making the little city? We used to have to make mini "cities of the future" for class projects around that age. It seems like shoeboxes, paint and glue could make a lot of this.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by queensissy at 2:34 PM on October 27, 2023

If you're feeling crafty and have a little time and leftover boxes, you can make a little city for decoration and end-of-party stomping. (Edit: sorry, just saw the low-time constraint.)
posted to Ask MetaFilter by phooky at 2:18 PM on October 27, 2023

How about the Mrs Murphy series by Rita Mae Brown? I don't know the most recent books, but enjoyed the first twenty or so. There are a few recurring characters, so reading a new book feels like meeting old friends again. (You have to be ok with animals talking to each other, though.)
posted to Ask MetaFilter by amf at 1:08 AM on October 28, 2023

Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents is a book that may be relevant.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by wicked_sassy at 7:17 AM on October 28, 2023

What was your first concert?

1974 - Frank Zappa and The Mothers - “10 Years of The Mothers” tour.

And which ones stick most in your mind...

The Ramones live. It was a non-stop audio buzzsaw. Amazing. The band live was nothing at all like their records. Just gloriously loud and fast.
posted to MetaFilter by Thorzdad at 12:32 PM on October 24, 2023

BRB, gotta go change into some flannel and Docs.
posted to MetaFilter by wenestvedt at 10:39 AM on October 25, 2023

"...That's the news for now, stay tuned for more throughout the day, here on MTV" — Kurt Loder

👨‍🚀🇺🇸🎶📺
posted to MetaFilter by Ivan Fyodorovich at 10:21 AM on October 25, 2023

This feels like eponysterical bait and I love it
posted to MetaFilter by Cogito at 9:45 PM on October 25, 2023

Man, the jeepney is such a big part of Filipino identity, it will be very hard to let that go culturally. I know they keep saying that they are relics from WWII and converted once the war was over and the US finally left us alone. Maybe they started out as such, but there the ones on the road these days are newer and purpose-built to be a jeepney for transportation. One of the most well-known manufacturers when I was growing up was Sarao Motors.

They are not all clunkers... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by tinydancer at 11:57 PM on October 25, 2023

Assuming you aren't downplaying what he did to present a rosier picture of your relationship than what really is...

Yeah. You're waaaay overstepping by even having these conversations with him. If my partner talked to me like this about normal shit I'm doing, I'd be questioning whether they even like me and I'd also be pretty offended by their sense of entitlement, where the fuck do they get off thinking they can control me and make me self conscious about myself etc.... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by MiraK at 4:16 AM on October 24, 2023

You can get a 50 pack of tiny glow in the dark ducks for about 5 bucks.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by phunniemee at 2:11 PM on October 23, 2023 marked best answer

Consider how much more time flogging will take from you.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by trig at 12:34 AM on October 22, 2023

I know it’s a cliche, but: the best time to plant a tree is twenty years ago; the second best time is today. You deserved to be diagnosed as a child; you have that diagnosis now

I don’t know what you consider “a late age” for your diagnosis but I was an adult, old enough to have had adult children, when I was diagnosed. I was well into my career and had developed a lot of coping mechanisms to cover for it.

I have looked back decades and raged... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Francies at 9:53 PM on October 21, 2023

The Playing For Change group has a sister foundation that works with arts education programs for kids worldwide. One of those groups is Turnaround Arts, a group devoted to developing arts education in the US, with different artists devoting themselves to promote arts education in their own communities. And - by "artists", I don't only mean, like, the local juggling troupe or whatever; Cameron Diaz is overseeing the program at a Florida school, Josh Groban has a school in Chicago,... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by EmpressCallipygos at 7:57 PM on October 20, 2023

On some level I wish we'd have never left the era of self-hosting ["self-hosting", as often you were paying an ISP for disk space] and web rings and stuff like that.

I mean, that's what Mastodon is, right?
posted to MetaFilter by grumpybear69 at 2:41 PM on October 18, 2023

I'm a firm believer in the opposite of whatever Anil Dash says.
posted to MetaFilter by dobbs at 2:35 PM on October 18, 2023

The idea that we could have avoided all of this if we had just paid for platforms rather than rely on ads is false: the corporations would have just added ads in anyway. They already do this with streaming services: you pay because you don't want ads, and then they put ads back in unless you pay more.

Why would capitalists leave money on the table?

As technology gets better at behavioral surveillance, they get a more and more granular idea of the... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by AlSweigart at 1:11 PM on October 18, 2023

The Empire Builder (Chicago to Seattle) is generally regarded as ‘better’ from west to east based on passing prettier scenery at convenient times, but it also matters what time of year.

I have only ridden the Coast Starlight as far south as Oakland, but on the Oakland to Portland leg, the Oregon cascades are in daylight northbound (but mostly not southbound, at least not in November).

Kansas City is a good stop - there is good transit from... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by janell at 9:59 PM on October 18, 2023 marked best answer

Wearing an N95 or better mask. Talk to the school about air filters and ventilation. There are some groups pushing for this, and if you try searching in your area you may find one. Have they had Covid? It can affect the immune system. This is all likely related to Covid and the lack of fresh air.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Crystalinne at 10:37 AM on October 18, 2023

Tossing vinegar in can mean you fill a cup or two with vinegar and run a wash cycle with just those, no soap or other dishes.

Are you using a rinse agent like Jet Dry?
Is there a filter and have you cleaned it out?



For a tea kettle, I treat with white vinegar from time to time. Soak for a bit, rinse a lot, and then heat water and dump it. Also, if you can dry out the kettle and not let drops linger, that may help.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by soelo at 11:26 AM on October 18, 2023

Wowwww, that photo of Diane Baird made me exclaim out loud, "Jesus, I bet this is Diane," before I saw the caption underneath. I have goosebumps about how uncannily she resembles the person I imagined, especially that smug, supercilious expression on her face.
posted to MetaFilter by MiraK at 11:35 AM on October 17, 2023

How is the compensation package (by which I assume you mean benefits)? You may still have room to negotiate here. Nothing obligates you to follow their "rules" about providing paystubs, especially considering that their "rules" are illegal.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by heatherlogan at 5:03 PM on October 16, 2023

I recently got an Acer Swift for about $450 on sale, and I just got my kid an Acer chromebook for about $220. I think they're solid devices. You don't need to spend $500+ to get a decent machine for basic everyday tasks like word processing, internet, streaming, etc.
posted to Ask MetaFilter by gnutron at 6:38 AM on October 17, 2023

It's not like making this collection optional is going to mollify any of these people in the least. They want these themes and characters and people gone. Just plain gone. Because they're bigots.
posted to MetaFilter by brundlefly at 9:37 AM on October 16, 2023

I can't deal with Blown Away at all; they kick good people off way too early to the point that I'm screaming at the TV.

Junior Bakeoff is really good, but... there are problems. The kids losing makes me cry worse than regular bakeoff people losing, which also makes me cry more than I like to be made to cry by a stupid gameshow about baking. Junior... Oh, God, it's giving me pain even now. Okay, the other issue there is that there are kids of all... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by Don Pepino at 2:30 PM on October 16, 2023

Have you seen Face Off? It's the best reality TV show, even better than Bake Off, yeah I said it.

It's a competition show from the SyFy channel for SFX makeup. Unlike cooking or whatever, which I alas cannot eat through the screen, I have 100% of the faculties required to judge if makeup intended for screen viewing is indeed good to view on screen.

The judges and guest hosts are all industry professionals with actual hands on experience. The... [more]
posted to Ask MetaFilter by phunniemee at 7:35 AM on October 16, 2023

250 - Andy Summers
249 - Brittany Howard
248 - Robby Krieger
247 - Ricky Wilson
246 - Paul Simon
245 - Leslie West
244 - Edilio Paredes
243 - Aaron Dessner and Bryce Dessner
242 - Lindsey Jordan
241 - Keith Urban
240 - Erin Smith
239 - Duane Eddy
238 - Doug Gillard
237 - Jennifer Batten
236 - Greg Sage
235 - Laura... [more]
posted to MetaFilter by The Tensor at 12:45 AM on October 15, 2023

Is there a simple list somewhere, so that I don't have to wade through umpteen ads and browser crashes on my tablet to be properly infuriated as to how many people are ahead of Jan Akkerman?
posted to MetaFilter by delfin at 11:35 AM on October 14, 2023

Is Allan Holdsworth really not on this list? Or Paco de Lucia?

Nile Rodgers in the top ten?

Did they actually talk to any guitarists?
posted to MetaFilter by swift at 11:02 AM on October 14, 2023